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RE-Birthday Reflection

At about age (0) I probably began to recognize there was Other, surrounding Self, and that together we made up my entire WeSelf Universe.

By age 20:

I had a severe case of Negative Sexual Deviance Complex, being gay and kind of not really seeing the physical and metaphysical world the way everyone around me, and in my past, saw the world (with the exception being Robert Norton, whom I met when I was 19 or 20).

How can there be a just WeSelf Universal Intelligence who would tolerate such evil, and still be omnipotent in the sense of all the power I could imagine to rectify the wronged; apparently from birth?  Why would God create what God would intelligently comprehend as “waste” rather than recyclable nutrients?

By age 40:

My Deviance is now neither Positive, nor Negative. It just is.  It has its own natural rationality, however mysterious this may be to me. Sensory-message deviance is simply the thinner air swirling around a hetero-confluent, yet still quantitatively gender bi-polar, norm. So, there cannot be any such thing as an Intelligent Omnipotent Universal WeSelf.

Power cannot be intelligently understood and used efficiently, there could be no shared learning of information patterns, relationships, difference, if all we could rationally say about Universal Power is that it is “polynomial”–everywhere, equally related, random, entropic; equally capable at all times, regardless of the place, regardless of the time, my time, our time, cause-effect relationship could not be cognized.  If this were all we knew about In-Formative Power.

Yet, somehow, for some reason, we appear to be able to deductively predict the continuance of some relationships across space and time, and even when others will end, and why.  It is these deductively predictable trends that we comprehend as “polynomial” memes, metrics, patterns, analogies, logical relationships, paradigms, information systems.

At age 60:

The evolution of metrics, language, religion, natural and spiritual systems primally regenerates. E-volution appears bi-polar organized and cognized with mindful and gratuitous SuperEco-Equity. Plus/Minus energy, function, and 4-SquareRooted Prime Relationship pattern frequency (“fractal” and Fuller’s ‘tetrahedrally isometric spin-wave, symmetrically and synergetically forming) is really not such a new thermodynamically balanced Law of Nature, I seem to recall from Chemistry, and Physics classes, too long ago, and yet too soon to recognize the symmetry of Geometric Group Theory and Biological Group Theory and Religious Group Theory, and Cell Group Theory, and Small Group Theory and String Theory; between evolution and revolution; between eco-equity and resolution as this regenerative Great Turning.

What is In-formation suddenly reverses and exforms, returning as promised, exforming toward tipping optimizing potential of this Eternal Moment. My greatest effect with least effort is to recognize our sublimation, our absolute fullness to satiation through the purgative hope that we will always gratefully notice and care for each other’s suffering, the future suffering of our children, the past suffering of our elders. For this mutual care is why we needed to create this mess we share with Grace.

Mistakes become sins when not mindful of what they can teach us.

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