I remember feeling special
hoping for a path beyond the Law of reason
with shamanic powers
to grasp and change
and save myself,
my family from death,
uninvited decay and dissonance.
Owl came to whisper
“Shaman-child, be born again”
I was afraid to die with Her.
Purgation feels wrong and putrid,
an offense to creating hope and faith.
This death would be too common
for my Self-potential Shaman.
Bear came to teach me
hibernation’s coincidental embrace,
and not death.
My cave of fear is where I sleep
until spacetime is ready
to call forth one of her eternal pearls.
One among all, each with our place
and time to shine
smooth-structured
fluid,
a reincarnating pearl
well-strung strong
in harmonious round octave
to carry forth our future
pearl of paradise.
Yet still I want and wait and balk and fear
disgraced ungrateful,
ungraced disgrateful,
wishing victory for my silent cave
of dark potential integrity.
If I could make it so
I would,
to call out Spring of hope at last
our season of regenesis,
but are we ready?
So still I wait and balk and fear.
I confuse my faith
with our self-consciousness.
Raven calls the Shaman call
within Elder cave’s cell-consciousness;
regenesis is always near
between tomorrow and right now.
We are only this integrity,
Eternal Moment’s potentiality
toward vast polyculturant affection
through present’s winnowing comparison
with past negative effects.
Shared black silo of fearful smothering
alone without relationship to space or time.
Turn around.
Our positive pilgrimage rises convexly,
together toward expanding solidarity.
With obedient trepidation
I face about to face the face
Other knows about,
with timid voice, I hesitate,
“Does the Shaman assembly accept your verdict?”
It’s not my place to speak this way
but silence screams back to me
“Okay.”
More confident with building hope
“Does our shamanic assembly accept our verdict?”
Again the reconnecting cave of reconciliating
silent wisdom string
stretching back through cultured history of pearls.
Incarnating faith,
with graceful dance of presence,
“Do we accept present integrity
of future’s positive promise?”
I sing our dance
reechoing strings of eco-normic pearls
toward future’s present past.
Permacultured pearls prance prescient presence.