I was interviewing the Head Poobah
of our Norwick Public Utility CoOperative
and asked him
Where did the 22 percent goal come from
for acquiring renewable energy?
As compared to 78 percent from nonrenewable
and guaranteed increasingly costly electricity sources
like burned-out oil and gas and coal,
with their concomitant stinky smokestacks.
“As I recall
when we needed a number
for our report on future numbers,
that was a number
we had nearly achieved
so we found this number
a realistic one to report now
about our future goal,
now basically attained.”
Is that how you derive all your health and safety goals
for our future health and safety?
“Without having thought about it,
and retaining the right to change my Head Poobah mind,
I guess that would be about right
22 percent of the time.”
I was hoping for 100 percent,
or as close to it
as your mind might derive
through deeper and wider contemplation,
not to mention higher.
“As concerns my health and safety
and truth-telling goals,
although I cannot say 100 percent for sure,
I believe I am currently at about 78 percent
about suboptimizing choices
for future health and safety.”
Do you recall
if anyone asked
what a 100 percent green energy goal
might look like in Norwick?
I’m sure I would remember
something so unimaginable.”
And why is a 100 percent ecological healthy and economic safety goal
so unimaginable to our Head Poobah?
“That would really require
of using only greener renewable energy
and incorporating that focal point
over all our
cooperative v BusinessAsUsual competitive
and WinLose budgeting
and strategic planning
for achieving super-saturating
WinWin health and safety goals
for the entire Norwick CoOperative Utility.”
isn’t that what one would cooperatively expect
if one were handsomely paid
to become Head Poobah
of something called
Norwick CoOperative Efficacy, Incorporated?
I am at least 78 percent certain you have that nonrenewably wrong,
we are the Norwick Public Utility Corporation.”
Oh, I see.
How silly of me,
confusing efficacy with utility
and public ownership with cooperative
“Not a problem.
When you’ve been in the public and personal sector businesses as long as I have,
you don’t realistically expect to hit 100 percent
on health and safety and truth-remembering.”
That’s extremely disconcerting.
“Good news for you.
Disaster sells more papers.”
but paper still comes from trees
cooperating with clean air and water
and just-right solar rays
to avoid future climates of public,
at least 78 percent of local Head Poobah times
and incorporating places.
I didn’t actually say that last part out loud,
but I was most self-righteously thinking it.