Cardinal Love

I host many song birds,
but never enough.

I steal them from neighbors
with lavish tax-relief offers,
free food
and housing
in exchange for their relocation
and entertainment.

I love them all
but especially red cardinals,
him with her.

They hang and fly together.
An integrity couple
more than the robins
and sparrows
and bluejays
and finches I have flinchingly noticed.

I’m not so sure how mourning doves might compare
with red rapturous cardinals,
him flashy patriarchal
and her graceful matriarchal
sharing worms and seeds
with a bilaterally grateful kiss.

watching them carry on
from tree
to garden sea
to nested night to be,
I feel alone
longing to belong
mutually beloved,
and not so autonomously impaired.

Kissing oneself
and our own past life investments
in mistrust of goodbye
without farewell
is better than no healing kiss at all,
yet falls awesomely short
of cardinal couple kisses.


UnPublished Thoughts


Yes dear.

Have you ever had an unpublished thought?

What does that mean?
Is this about my profligate tendencies?
Of course
You know perfectly well I’ve never been published.

No, I mean
Have you ever had a thought
that included the thought
that maybe you need not actually say it
out loud?
or even whisper it to yourself?
Whether there are other ears to eagerly listen in
or not.

why would anyone think that?

Oh, I don’t know.
Maybe so those around you
would have more time and space to think
their own unpublished thoughts?

Not to change the subject,
but I have a more interesting question for you.
Have you ever had an unpublishable thought?

Oh my yes!
All my favorites.

So what would make your favorites
without value for promulgation?

If you have to ask
then I know you could not afford to buy them.

I have no idea what that even means.
Maybe an example.
What would be a favorite thought
you have never shared with anyone?

How lovely it would be
if you had more unpublished thoughts.

I’m not sure what to say.

But that didn’t stop you from saying something
did it?

Is this about me thinking out loud too much?

But I’m sure it’s about not listening enough.

To you?

but certainly not listening enough to yourself.

Well that’s how I listen to myself,
by talking to myself,
or whispering, maybe, sometimes.

So then, yes,
I guess it’s about not listening enough to the silence
of my favorite unpublishable thoughts and feelings.

That sounds deeply provocative.

Only if you listen right.
Is that a silencer in your pocket?