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ReCentering Domestic NonViolence

This brisk, sunny March morning, I return from delivering my son to his adult daycare van.

Upon opening The Norwich Times, I delight to read the new Center for Safe Futures “will be taking a huge step forward in how well we can serve the growing number of our neighbors who need help with domestic violence…”

After reading the article, I am delighted about this significant half-step toward a more integrated and holistic service structure to improve safety and well-being outcomes for victims and survivors of violence, assault, stalking, physical and verbal hate-crime abuse, black-market sale pricing for using powerless and unheard and unseen and uncared for human bodies commodified to provide third party capital profits, and other disturbing forms of predative trauma.

Violently polarizing drama threatens trust in neighborhood-felt survival, and our civil, compassionate community thrival, every time we hear, and, god forbid, exhaustively watch depressing, national history-making news brought to us by our uncivil, wounded and wounding retributive criminal justice systems; uncaring, unhealthy, and certainly not holistic empowerment systems for nonviolent reconciliation.

My colleagues on the Norwich Youth, Family, and Recreation Advisory Board have become used to my eagerness to celebrate half-steps toward win/win strategic restorative peace while simultaneously sternly reconsidering our missing nonviolent communication step away from retributive win/lose justice systems. World wide webs pitching prey against predator, cultivating my despair about polarizing dissociative drama rooted in divisive demonizing trauma systems that do not empower resilient health and safely resonant domestic wealth.

Down near the bottom of the first front-page column I read, “Service providers and community partners will work together to break the [systemic trauma] cycle of violence and abuse.” Wow! Now this is an unexpected good news mission statement!

On second thought, it does echo messianic scriptured messages about the Christian Prince of Peace’s salvific mission, and that, so far, feels like an aging, poor in spirit, and increasingly despairing half-empty step toward downsizing EarthJustice expectations for global nonviolent peace and justice.

In my wild decaffeinated morning meditations, this eagerly anticipated aspiration, to break the win/lose bonds of systemic trauma, reminds me of a huge covenant change proposed for discussion at All Souls UU, in New London.

“We covenant to dismantle racism and all forms of systemic oppression.” I wonder how we would practice such powerful “Beloved Community” passion. How could our faith communities help break the vicious cycle of violence, abuse, and emotional neglect fueling neurosystemic trauma?

Perhaps Restorative Justice and Peace Reconciliation practices of nonviolent communication could empower transparent and vulnerable dialogue between defendants and predators, so often brought together and stuck together by addictive codependence–which feels safer, and economically healthier than aching loneliness, emptiness, hopelessness, despair of punishment, shame, blame, Othering judgments that we do not merit unconditional warm regard.

My own therapeutic feelings of hope, informed by Multicultural Community Mediation, focusses on safer and healthier and emotionally wealthier compassionate relationships. Empowering intention and win/win designed retention I cannot find in this article. It misses a redemptive half-step that could prophetically declare we will not tolerate the “vengeance is mine” heresy that perpetuates future victimization. Excommunication brought to us by judicial and police systems inciting weaponized trauma among those voted least likely to succeed by disassociated peers.

Is it reasonable to hope this Center for Safe Futures, and all the best intervention and prevention practices advertised by an expanding Family Justice Center model may be fully baptized in the peace-making waters of Restorative Justice?

Will domestically healthy and safe mission statements survive the ribbon cutting to become resiliently saved from past systemic trauma sins of our Straight White Patriarchal fathers?

I guess I’m still waiting, as my acidic coffee stomach turns cold with impatient curiosity, for some other brilliantly brighter good news front-page article announcing the multiculturally grand virtues of neurosystemic trauma-informed therapeutic projects to ReCenter Healthy Bodies and Safe Mind Wellness Futures.

Compassionate futures that restore virtuous communion circles of therapeutic repair–and not viciously retributive, accountability trauma hierarchies continuing to promise more efficiently enlightened from-above services, still half-stepping toward managing a universally disunitarian pandemic of dissociative despair.

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Tao of Resilience

Better together
than falling apart.

Inside I sigh
between sad traumas,
mad bad dramas
fading together
when not
not
not thought and felt glad

Better left together
than falling
falling
falling right wing apart

Outside we cry
for health balanced justice
restoring wealth
amongst resilient us,
becoming enlightened
and left-right co-empowered.

Better communion together
healthier together
wealthier yang-strong union
together co-passionate becoming
learning
knowing
feeling

Better together
than falling
falling
failing Sun’s spirit
reversing Earth’s nature,
bright light
slighting shadow showers
of EarthTribe powers,
roots failing
despairing apart

Inside against outside
ego against eco…
apartheid

Returns better together
better inside together
better outside together
than falling inside
against outside
apart.

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Morning Rounds

I woke up this morning
wondering where I was last night
when this morning,
a glint in my mind,
before wandering how I last got home
here from last night
again

Hoping
without probable gumption
maybe if I figured transport out
and in
I might have a clue about why
I woke up yesterday morning
wondering where I would end up last night

And just before last night’s end
when this morning couldn’t yet answer
any endtime circling questions
I wondered how I arrived
at this tomorrow
differently
and the ecocidal same

Approaching win/win play
and avoiding win/lose AnthroSupremacist work

Before becoming fully present
to yesterday’s disempowering promise
once curiously engaging
resilient win/win more

Sacred listening nighttime deeper
and multicultural trauma-prevention
daylight wider
long-term cooperative
co-invested ego resilience
following my most resonant
win/win sacred ecosystemic
re-entry Tao of brilliant
nonviolently communicating
inside/outside balance

Of morning rounds
perilously in-between lose/lose
nightmare traumatic despair
and win/win delight
daytime therapeutic repair.

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Orthodox Experiences

I was bruised by dogmatically non-evangelical
Christ monotheistic Jehovah judgmental bad faith
of divine powers
equally entitled
to generously create love
and selfishly act out of jealousy
divine punishment for unfaithful sins
of worship omission
and secularizing commission

Prescribed by the inspired
and kleptocratically negotiated
Greek
and Latin
and English transubstantiations
of AnthroSupremacist visions
speaking
and singing
and dancing
in white male dominant translations

Royal capital is holy
next to divine monopolistic inspiration
of presumably omniscient sacred values
captured by scribes
and conserved by councils
of presumably straight white orthodox
literate males
representing ecclesial royalty

Featuring Jewish Saul
turned Christ Active Revivalist Paul
writing self-governance purification letters
suggesting that ecclesial rituals
of a polytheistic sensual nature
are the opposite
of our most monotheistic spiritual
yet HolySpirit EarthMatriarchal mindful
sacred panentheistic experiences.

I am also more metaphysically resonant
as a YangNatural/YinSpiritual co-passion Taoist
believing through deep listening
to my (and possibly our)
deepest restorative regenerous justice
Yang/Yin co-operative communication intentions
throughout male/female co-investing reproductive
cause-effect linear days
and co-empathic
regeneratively resilient
lunar recircling nights

CoPassioning
yintegral humane sexuality
as our deepest,
highest
and best sacred sensory practice
positive synergy practice
health wealthing practice
till we get ourselves
Yang in and Yintegral out
depolarizing balance
resiliently Left/Right
co-empathic
resonant dialogical praxis

Bodhisattva
co-messianic
co-passionate Left/Right
internal/external communionation
practice
verbally positive thoughts
and metaphysical theories
about nonverbal healthy felt
nonviolent physical feelings.

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Growing Healthier Hopes

For measuring fleeting successes
of punishing policing justice,
we have overly relied on recidivism rates
in response to curiosity about
How to decrease crime.

For enjoying compassion
of restorative
healing justice,
we rely on win/win mediation
to grow deep resonance
and widely resilient integrity

In response to curiosity about
How to increase health
and safety
and happiness
locally egotherapeutic
and globally ecotherapeutic.

Retributive justice
fails a healthy and safe
wellness society
as it continues to punish
and excommunicate wounded
win/lose damaged criminals.

Meanwhile
community-based visions
for restoring wellbeing
equity
justice
become increasingly effective
and resilient
as parents
and teachers
and leaders
shift our victimization focus
from CRIMES, violent and/or financial,
to healing victims of TRAUMA

Personal
and systemic,
political
and economic,
locally genocidal
and globally ecocidal.

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Lessons Partially Learned

Parents
and teachers,
economic program
and social service leaders,
government administrators
and legislators,
listen up
and downstream

We too often act
and feel
the reverse is more quickly
and convenient
through rigid control,
or at least should
or could
or would like to be enlightened true
more than disempowering false:

Empowering cooperative ownership
arrives slowly
but resonantly
and more resiliently
through enlightened cooperative management
experience
and win/win resonant tenure

And not so much the other
entitled
and self-righteous
stress
and vindictive trauma
competitive way around
treading heavy capitalism’s survival
of the wealthiest
defeating thrival
of our healthiest
trusted ways abound
to cooperatively manage peace
that we would justly hope
to EarthTribe own
into safest perpetuity

A trusted indigenous wisdom franchise
to retrain
and re-educate parents
and teachers,
empower economic programs
and enlighten social service leaders,
self-governing cooperative administrators
and legislators,
listening up
and downstream
for cooperative management systems
supporting lives never autonomously owned
and always sacredly zoned
for interdependent trust

Empowering cooperative management
systems
for enlightened cooperative
organic network peace
and restorative justice
building
inviting
engaging
immersion

In win/win joyful play
all night
and day.

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Wounded World

I’ve seen Earth’s epitaph:
S/He did more than Her share
to heal a broken world

Which sometimes seems to invoke anger
because I can touch what’s broken
and other times provoke merely sad
because I can only feel inside
who is also wounded

Earth’s living magic,
watered fertile soil,
red-blooded organic
green clean soul
is not broken
like a worn-out clock
or formerly animated toy
or obsolescent urban block
now gone inevitably bad.

EarthTribe is not so much broken
as win/lose perpetually wounded
Paradise Lost
for our lapse
of good-humored Golden Rules
win/win re-found
happy healthy bodhisattva
rebound.

What is already broken
requires outside messianic agency,
too objectively disabled
to stimulate subjective healing salvation,
personally feeling better

Emergent internally vital
growing positively viral,
stealing from toxic claustrophobic disarray,
tomorrow’s voices redeemed
by choices erupting therapeutic promise
today.

Organic wounds,
unlike mechanical brokenness,
give internal notice
warnings of disenabling trauma
also enable therapeutic opportunity
to pull and push risk,
to massage and stretch ambiguous feelings
touching each Other’s sinews
and straps,
moral lapse,
dancing mental songs
and embodied raps

Filling in our anti-social lapse
our monoculturing elapse
of warm
and wet
and wild compassion,
integrity’s redemptive fashion.

Brokenness shrouds despair
alone
where wounds invite
our active healthy care
together happiness vocationed
for EarthTribe’s ecstatic day
by faithful contenting way
inclusively inviting
inspirational repair
with those who dare
to share Earth’s communal difference
to heal this wounded world.

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Another Storm

Another storm threatens to come in,
feeling my responsibility
for uncaring
and unresponsive history

Fearing you
more than loving us

Setting out your pails
and plastic tubs
to catch cold
and dreary drips

Impaled remembering
past wet enemies
becoming darker spots
as moisture threatens,
building mold untold
as yet
by angry lips

Dripping windowed frames
and ceiling fixtures
of your felt losses
not equally carried
by more comforted me
opaque with tender crosses

Buried
in how lonely
love can feel
hidden in Earth’s evolving top,
improbable to see

Our together threatening
leaky roof may drown,
which you would have fixed
some months ago,
if you could do so
on your own.

This storm pauses
and brighter rays suggest
a sun still shining
behind dark uncivil distress

Clouds could uncover
our disassociation,
poor and hovering
coveting a sun-drenched nation

Calculating our cost in cash,
but not in minds and bodies
to stop stormy smothers
of inside raining
draining issues,
deep core tissues
thundering crash

Warning we must get this done
before another wild wet storm
fearing you
more than loving us,
undone

Darker clouds build to leak again
while I explain why
you still can’t trust me
to invest in unstormed peace

A contenting roof
unconditionally done

So all EarthTribe
can safely put away our pails
and nails,
defensive weapons,
buckets,
overflowing pans
and spans of climate panic

Now rumbling receding thunder
of fearing you
more than loving us

Turns toward replacing damaged health,
repriming stains repainting wealth
of more warmly wild respect
while together musing
about who is bare surviving
and is not thriving
with what prestorming care,

Remembering who is dry
and fair
and prosperous
and why
we fear this tragic storm
more than loving weathered warm.

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Bruising Words

Words too often have rough edges,
bloody histories,
lines more defined
than relentlessly imaged cliffs,
worshipping sacred sunlight shades
of high hazards

Coveted risks
more than needed opportunities
to hard wall wail against wild creations
unmoved by words
without animated calling
longing
belonging
or wooing wilderness

Offending worded weapons
seducing well-schooled tools

Sounds with edges
and without

Opening and closing
edgeless sighing pause

Slowly awaiting surf’s slow
slurried
soft
slavish turn
to reach for shores
absorbing thoughtless
sand-grained
edges.

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Widowed ComPassion

Said the old widow cook
to the drag queen son
feeding his/her dying abusive dad,
while offering her nurturing donation:

“I don’t want your money.
We’re not savages, yet.”

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