Uncategorized

What is THAT about?

Truthfully,
and kinda depressing,
I can’t “manage” anger
any better than fear
and contagious distrust
and nearly constant anxiety
and chronic depression.

In nonviolent communication practice circles,
peace networks,
organic therapeutic systems,
“curiosity” slowly grows ascendent
as “patience” to resist negative feelings
and “impatience” with shameless Others
and not so blameless Selves
fades off into a less used lexicon.

Impatience about expressing anger,
verbally and nonverbally,
evokes LeftBrain dominant
patriarchal
capitalist
corporate management models
for hierarchically oppressive
suppressive
repressive
not really impressive
humorless control.

Curiosity about deep therapeutic win/win potential
for evolving healthcare competencies
comes from a political economy
of co-operative compassion

NOT: intimidating
and frightening scarcity
of control
sufficient to guarantee
a never-ending expansion
of ego-engorgement
through solitary
deductive
reductive
dualistic non-enlightenment
segregating the StraightWhiteMale
corporate well-capitalized WINners
from us unstraight
unwhite
unmale frightening
and yet uppity LOSErs

Apparently LeftBrain incapable
of managing our anger issues,
sometimes frightened by vulnerability
and emotional transparency
yet quietly curious about compassion
and neuro-sensory peak
RightBrain prominent
interdependent
co-empathic
co-invested peak spiritual experiences
biological
ecological
theologically transcendent

Exploding boundaries of autonomous ego-defensiveness
and, possibly, even Either/Or,
LeftBrain dominant Cause
OR RightBrain felt Effect,
StraightWhite monotheistic
Capital-theistic compunctions,
monoculturally supremacist,
macroeconomic win/lose predative,
pathologically angry and frightening
terrorized global apartisan politics.

Remarkably unfazed
by climax-trending ecocide
and degenerative patriarchal
capitalist
LeftBrain narcissistic
snarky
Us v Them genocide

Unconscious about our lack of control
to manage our viral global anger
while spiritually and naturally,
theologically and ecologically,
dying
from lack of win/win curious
green cooperative thrival.

Truthfully,
and kinda depressing,
we can’t “manage” anger
any better than climate fear
and contagious EarthTribal distrust
and nearly constant neuro-systemic anxiety
and chronic LeftBrain dominant
divisive depression.

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Uncategorized

Blues Boating Home

Human history is difficult;
hard pressed,
discovering
and rediscovering,
connecting
and reconnecting feelings
about therapeutic needs
and sacred wants
for peace
trust
joy

Through co-empathic singing passions
which may,
too often,
feel stressful

Irritating
depressing
stormy
before unconditional win/win regard
for Self AND Other
reconnect,

Like EgoTheistic re-ligion
and EcoMatriarchal
indigenously multicultural
wisdom

Of Ego/EarthTribe mutual becoming
more green therapeutic together
than win/lose competitive
dissociating
controlling and too egocentric
and too anthro-dominant
held too LeftBrain supremacist
apart.

On my drive back
to my blue turbulent home,
I struggle with postpartum depression,

Common when I separate
from spiritual sojourner musicians,
fellow wandering sacred wonderers
would-be soul-full,
not hopelessly ego-engorged, harmonizers
and intuitive dancers,
expressively embodied movers
and economic-political shakers,
mindful ecological leaders
and GoodNews infused chorus girls
and everyday win/win polyphonic boys,
maturely compassionate men and women
and exotic in-between
bodhisattva polytheists.

Why am I feeling irritated
against you?

What could I have said
and gestured,
and shared,
and done,
and not done
to let you know,
to let you in
on how unheard
unseen
and unappreciated I am feeling
as this evening,
this mortal life,
this sacred opportunity
slides
and swims
and sails by.

In more recent weeks
our original intent
to listen deeply
with informed compassion
for wounds
becoming unweaponed,
for win/win communion therapies
that join
conjoin
rejoin past win/lose traumas
feels unraveled,
sidetracked,
drydocked
in issues about pain,
suffering,
loss of control,
severances overwhelming renewals,
universal climatic turbulence
flooding remaining hopes
for unitarian green/blue EarthTribe
boating peaceful home.

Why do you seem so triggered
by alpha stressed competitions
with our sometimes surprisingly controlling
too egocentric
capitalistic spiritual director,
sacred leader,
ecopolitical peace activist,
theological love teacher,
ecological panentheistic mentor,
health-is-wealth core care facilitator,
multicultural mediator,
operations conductor
of musicians, at our musing
and amusing best,
and not cacophonously win/lose strategists
at our distrusting
and mistrusting worst.

I become curious
about why you want to control
our musical mountainous expression
of plain and solid standing
to sing together
by remaining distant
from my inside rolling oceans
of peak sensory
musical movement experiences.

Why do you seem less curious
about how I struggle to joyfully continue sailing
never, ever having known safe harbor
or healthy home portal,
on this straight white privileged place?

Sailing on this epic journey
for positive regard
that I know,
without shadows of depressing doubt,
will stand
and sit
and lie,
listen and speak and sing with me
as I am embraced
with all my woundedness
and all our co-empathic sacred brilliance
to joyfully celebrate,
quietly appreciate,
gratefully acknowledge
everyday sacraments
of kindred sailing souls

Making our blue ways home
under stars of full moon heavens
embracing revolutions
of therapeutic light
and traumatic night,
wondering

How frightening it feels
to age away from peak mental
spiritual
physical
natural control

Facing inevitable mortal degeneration
threatening to steal back
my sureness
that below Me
and within
We feel no motion,
no terrifying emotion
while standing firmly in control
of this plain
everyday
yet mountainous
musical event

Of rolling co-operations
and conflicts,
voiced and hidden,
in overwhelm surviving mode
so not able to access confident
curious co-thrival
co-passionate means
to deeply listen
and appreciate
being born to sail this Earth
together in this time
of climatic changing
blue boat swamping terror

Within the fathoms
of our turbulent oceanic universe,
traveling salt-teared Earth
driving home
wondering why you are now less curious
about why my fluidly
legato love story
requires a cappella blues,
reflective repetitions,
emotive nuances
as slow
and widely engaged,
deeply felt
as floating thoughts
diving into EarthTribe’s most sacred
peak systemic experiences

Blue blues
rolling through oceans
of warm
salty wet Earth tears
of universal compassion

ReMembering
human history is difficult,
hard pressed,
discovering
and rediscovering,
connecting
and reconnecting feelings
about therapeutic needs
with sacred wants
for peace
trust
joy
sacred mused harmonics.

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Uncategorized

ReEducational Curriculum

As if EarthTribe global health
and climate safety
liberally and conservationally
mattered:

Pedagogical Core Needs
Manifest integrity’s neuro-sensory systemic
sacred potential,

In Living Soil Systems
In Healthy Water Networks
In Optimizing Food/Fuel CoOperative Win/Win Global/Local Economies
WithIn Fresh Clean Air/Energy
For Conservational Comfortable BodyMind Shelter
for Surviving
And Safety
for EarthTribe Thriving.

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Uncategorized

Straight White Privileged Silence

Listen to sterile silence
nursing homebound fans
wavering white noiselessness
of silent futile passing

Absence of passion
hope
care
happiness
or creased
and reasoned sadness.

Hear this void of madness,
lack of hunger
or parched thirst
for conversation
splendid nutrition
scandalous emission
empowering immigration
enlightened emigration
or angry fear emanation
of forced solitude migration

Into mortal loss
of sensory reception
political deception
economic perception
theistic inception
septic conception.

Smell nothing.
Taste everything
becomes dust
delustered rust
lust for transcendent
disembodied consummation
omnipresent transportation
omniscient evaporation
full latitude
for fragrance-free
plastic platitudes
feckless attitudes
disdainful blows
to further fertile emanations.

Sing where nothing
settles into rounding octave rings
to never
ever want to dance
in robust spirals
again

Against depressions
felt repressions
thought impressions
known suppressions
unheard deflation
worn through integration
transcultural conflation

Of panentheistic elegant Zeroes
absorbed by a monstrous
monopolistic silent
slick One

Listening to sterile silence
nursing homebound fans,
white emptiness
of silent
restless passing.

Glare at it.
Rake it in.
Sleep with it
if you dare
to care
without an inch
or squeezed moment
to spare.

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Universally Unitarian PRIDE

Buying corporate profit tickets
to this June’s PRIDE event
does not feel therapeutic,
where once lived public trauma.

Another annual rite
of well-bred socialization
political masturbation
with no flavor of resistance
to white-washed Capitalism’s greed,
to straight Patriarchalism’s need
to rapaciously breed
to gluttonously feed
on humble margins
of truly empowered
LeftBrain dominant humanity
not RightBrain depressed
demonically repressed
satanically oppressed
devilishly suppressed
Right supremely unimpressed
by deeply felt insanity
born a profanity
against Earth’s Straight
White
God

False idol
of patriotic
nationalistic pride
parades before
and lingers after
sins against EarthMother’s uncapitalized
anawim

Our planet’s
traumatically wounded child,
x-rated
x-rayed
x-cised
by homophobic toxins,
divinely inspired hate,
monotheistic vengeance-is-mine
militaristic fate.

This, and future, summers of inclusive love,
I would give away invitations to PASSION,
co-passion
compassion
compassionate integrity
of Left erect
correct cognition
greets Right flowing
enlightened growing
synergy glowing
sacred felt reconnecting
concelebrations

Of timeless
dipolar co-arising parades,
out-rageous raving displays
of globally spectral
spectacular
spiraling circular rainbows

Sacred hope promises
from regeneratively ribboned faith
for love
of EarthTribe’s holy
co-emergent DNA diversity
deeply held
in silent summer whispers

Inviting year-round
and full
and sweaty wet PASSION plays
stories
narratives
epic songs,
starred night light
and lunar displays

Flowing Right
Left strength
universally full
uniting Color

Healthy polycultures
wealthy multicultures evoking
not revoking
compassionating
never mindlessly sedating
fully woke
out celebrating
Earth’s PASSIONTribe.

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Uncategorized

ComPetitions for DisRegard

Am I unhealthy and unsafe oppressed,
suppressed,
repressed,
depressed?

Not really all that:
competitively impressive,
first through last impression
newsworthy,
enticingly marketable,
profitably commercial,
slickly corporate,
predatively intelligent

More camouflaged
unnoticed and undefined
unrefined
and, frankly, perhaps unstable
because of my environmental circumstances?
as liberal lovers
would have failing to ego-thrive anthrosupremacists
monoculturally privileged
and multiculturally misunderstood
underprivileged
shunned
and Othered

And/Or

Am I health/safety oppressed
because of my personal
bad ecopolitical choices?
like having unprotected sex
instead of going to the mall,

Not really reflecting on
wider and deeper context
like True Faith
and Healthy Happiness
monotheistically delivered
monopolistically endowed
StraightWhiteMale privileged
monoculturing LeftBrain transcendent
AnthroDivine judgment
falling shy
of unconditional regard

As win/lose divinely inspired Capital investments
support PatriarchalGod’s purely patriotic hierarchy
not-so-blindly selecting
who deserves Restorative Win/Win Justice
second
and third
and fourth chances

And who should not
escape Lose/Lose Retributive Dissociation
(repression, suppression, oppression, depression)

A social sympathy so thinly simpering
judicial powers are too comfortably scampering
to throw away personal freedom keys
with polarized dispassionate Disdain

Icing on Earth’s soggy cake
for feeding climate rabid
polarizing
angry
traumatized
lose/lose anthro-victims,
producers and consumers of Othering.

To get out from under-cussed non-classedness,
must I truly choose
between circumstantial ecological Voices
for resonant healthcare,
Or personal theological-felt internal Choices
for resilient wealthshare?

Do natural
polycultural healthcare systems
not co-arise
egowealthy green EarthPeace
spiritual co-investments?

So yes,
I guess,
answers to my oppressed prayers
by our liberal lover circumstances
and my conservational personal
integrating/desecrating
either Saint
or Sinner Choices

Do LeftBrain ignore
Both systemic conserving circumstances
And internal liberating intuitions

RightBrain questioning
interdependently unrecognized
NonVoices.

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Gifted Doorways

“Grief can be a doorway to love.”
Robin Wall Kimmerer, Braiding Sweetgrass

Grief can open toward gratitude
As loss can open doors to access gain

As trauma can open hearts
to therapeutic brains

As neglect can foster curious compassion

As depression
can incite active
co-empathic impressions

As double negative sociopathologies
can notice doorways
to positive psychologies

As double-binding
dualdark entropy
can open space
for positive double-binary energy strings
of co-empathic
multiculturing time

As isolating sadness
can open doors
to love’s transcendent gladness.

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When Lonely

When I’m feeling lonely
and anxious,
small and ineffective
against depression
descending like a brain fog bank

In this Elder moment,
I have grown faith
even this chronic dark veil
will withdraw,

Although
perhaps not as sure of when
as tomorrow’s fresh green/blue
worldview dawn

Naturally spirited dark nights
for ego embodied wounds
will recede again

When I’m feeling lonely
and anxious,
rather than healthy
good humored
and safe
with gratitude

For Earth’s panentheistic pleasures
win/win neurosensory practices,
whole-sum dialectical praxis
replete with paradigmatic
revolutionary creolization
musical recreations
across all nations
historically therapeutic
nonviolent communications

When I’m feeling anxious
and lonely,
I am wanting?
Needing what?

To feel healthy
and recognize my situation as factually
and fortunately safe
in some way?
I can say out loud
and take my Verbal Hemisphere dominant self
seriously
rather than speciously,
curiously
rather than furiously.

When I’m lonely
and fear depression’s
disenabling
and unenlightened fog,
am I needing to feel ego-compassion,
eco-systemic expansion?

To see Earth’s restorative health
within
balancing
Sun’s most resiliently revolutionary wealth,
without?

When feeling lonely
what do I most crave?

When feeling traumatized
wounded
internally divided
stuck
dissociated
cognitively/affectively dissonant,

Rather than bilaterally resonant
inside
as outside
deep polycultural revival
and widely
inclusively
multiculturally resilient

Is cooperative
eco-political correctness
what I need
for myself
and with all EarthTribe’s potential
Yang-full Yintegral flow?

Throughout healthy EarthSpace
and wealthy SunRevolving Time,
when feeling lonely,
what does my egobody need,
want,
most crave?

Deepest brave,
courageously transparent,
vulnerably curious way
to stay
safe and healthy
multigenerationally
and multiculturally
and polypathically
Yang monotheistic
and Yin panentheistic,

One full organic ZeroZone
and not, not empty polymathic
entirely
coldly
clinically theoretic.

When feeling anxious
I long for win/win robust anticipation

Gratitude
for a species
too win/lose comfortable
with VerbalHemisphere dominant genocide
and ecocidal ideations

While Elder Hemisphere wisdom
prominently celebrates
Spring rites of Yang fruitfulness
and Yintegral full flow flowering

Truth
and Beauty

Wholeness
and elegant holonic
co-relationships,
co-passion,
ego/eco-systemic Earth
Tribal green integrity

Synergy,
negentropy,
ergodically whole-sum
holonic win/win open
anticipating further enriching
green comforting energy.

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It Is My Impression

I would just like to say
that it is my impression
that longer hair
and other flamboyant affectations
are male dominant immersions
from sadly dull camouflage
into the birthright
and left
of his trans-pangenderal sex.

And I would also like to say
that it is my impression

That wars
and bombs
and other ballistic
bad depressions
are far more likely
as our fast paced race
toward mass extinctions
are killing Earth’s
healthiest climate pace.

And I would further
not like to say
that it is my impression

While predative parasites inhabit
and colonize our landmass
we’re also trash dumping
our oceans
swamping our warnings wasted
polluting our breath
about rabid tendencies
to eat our own young
with sick competitions
in militaristic fun.

And I would just like to say
that it is my sad impression

Apartheid is shunning
and rabidity is plumbing
as life losing EarthTribes
continue succumbing
to Mutually Assured
RightWing Destruction,
MAD rabid bullies blaming
and judging
and shaming
while throwing away care
for all those Others
not part of We,
supremely straight white patriarchal
Me.

I would just like to say
that it is my mad impression

Grown in a sacrileged perspiring image
of JehovahGodYahweh’s
avenging AllahWe
maybe shouldn’t die off
quite so quietly
when Earth’s Great Rapture
smells like ecocide
rabid unraveling decidedly

What Gaia would just like to say
health is Her wealthiest impression

That wars
and bombs
and rabidity
are humanity’s
own RightBrain repressing
LeftBrain dominant depressing
historically hysterical
degenerative stupidity.

Note: With gratitude, and apologies, to the brilliant, creative, musical minds of Hair, the musical.

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Uncategorized

Relationships I Hope For

I need clear blue rivers of life
to not always flow away from me,
in some direction
I can’t
or won’t
go right now.

I need green commitments to home
to feel mutually nurturing,
sheltering,
organic,
peaceful,
cooperatively engaging
in nonviolent communion,
co-passionate integrity
of sacred emergent space.

I need the sky
to not always feel grey,
dampening my curious natural spirits.
Instead,
I want to always imagine,
as needed,
as invited,
as if sun summoned,
a radiant blue sky
singing reflections
of invisible spinning stars
on the other
lighter side
of deepest icy winter’s
dense
dull
dark cloud bank
of settled in oppression.

I need rich black soil
to support my feet,
my nose,
my stomach,
green trees,
brightly colored plants
and amazing animated animals
giving back robust excretions,
reparations for past extractions,
borrowed co-investments
infesting EarthTribal
creolizing rich brown humus.

I need my rain-bowed neighbors
to notice
applaud
cheer
celebrate
when two elegantly athletic white swans
sensationally fly upstream
to hang out at our downtown harbor
where we eat
and drink,
rest
and float,
dream
and gloat,
on land
and sandy water,
at least side by side,
if not honking happy
swimming together.

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