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Trump’s Intake Interview

Hello,
you’ve reached the EcoTherapist Cooperative.
How can we help you
without bringing harm to Others?

That’s a question I’ve never thought about.
I’m calling for the National Republican Party.
We would like to hire an EcoTherapist
for a consultation
during the 2020 Republican Convention.

How did you hear about us?

I’m not sure.
I’m required to tell you
this request does not come from the White House,
where America is already great again.

So, I’m at least equally DarkState
about whether we are an apparent match
for your internal and external health objectives.
We could probably offer a free intake assessment.

How long will that take
and when is your earliest availability?

For the Republican National Leadership,
our intake process might feel like a life sentence
of self-judgment.
I could facilitate a cooperative assessment
transparently
vulnerably
curiously
integrally
holistically
synergetically
and immediately,
whenever your event organizer
is ready.

Oh I’m not sure we have THAT long.
Impatience to get on with
Making America Extract and Exploit Again
seems like our cultural norm around here,
especially in Business Party Convention Time,
which is sort of all the 24/7
eternal enterprising time
of busyness
restlessness,
longing for some healthy ecotherapy.

So let’s start,
get as far as we can,
and then come up with a date and time
and invitation list
for conventional continuance
and/or unconventional discontinuance
of eco-terrorism’s patriarchal
StraightWhiteMale privileged
Western left hemisphere dominant
degenerative
monocultural miseducation
School of Business As Usual.

I may need to bring someone else into this call
but let’s start
and I’ll take this as far as I can
with my fake security clearance.

That’s fine.
So, what are your ecotherapeutic goals
for the Republican Party?

I wasn’t aware that would be a prerequisite requirement
for the Cooperative’s engagement.

Are you perhaps noticing
that your ecotherapeutic platform
for future action
is currently blank,
as rooted in past lack of investment?

Yes, which is why the Convention Organizer
needs an EcoTherapeutic Developer
to facilitate a platform planning session
during our Convention.

What are your most significant multicultural health concerns
about your internal
and external properties?
landscapes?
cultures?
climates?

Are we talking national
and international real estate interests?
Or personal wealth?

Yes, both internal
and external health/pathology landscapes.
What are your regenerative ecotherapeutic concerns
and your degenerative ego-pathology issues?

Oh, that question is WAY above my pay grade
and security clearance!

No, actually the question is meant to be democratically accessible.
As ubiquitous as the U.S. census,
but I can see where the Republican National Party’s response
to this first cooperative question
might need to be appropriately redirected.
Do you want to bring someone else in right now
or schedule for future intake?

Would you mind holding for a couple minutes?

Our time investment is your health-wealthy time.
We’re here,
with this multicultural health question,
at least until the Rapture
or the degenerative death of all positive energy systems
on and within planet Earth,
depending on your theological
ecological paradigm of choice.

Wow!
I’m not sure this will work
but let me see if Donald
might not duck this question.
…………………………………..

Yes, hello,
this is your President Donald Trump.
I understand you want to thank me for your check.

No, Mr. President,
you have asked the EcoTherapist Cooperative
to plan a platform development session
at your Convention.
I have some questions
to see if this is a good fit for us;
Starting with,
What are your national
and international,
local and global healthy environment goals?
And, how are these informed by your personal
internal therapeutic landscape concerns?

Oh, I see,
Like who am I afraid to shake hands with
and who don’t I want in the same room
to breathe against each other?

I’m concerned that might be a rather long list.
Perhaps it would be an easier use of our time
if you could think of who you would like
to multiculturally shake hands with
and who you would most enjoy
sharing healthy life space with,
breathing compassionately together
rather than degeneratively against.

Could you give me an example?
I’m coming up with nothing.

Maybe you would enjoy greeting
and gratefully conversing with
a Buddhist zen gardener
about the ego-recentering LeftHemisphere
and eco-systemic RightHemisphere
effects of breathing
as economically
and politically healthy conversing
with nearby resilient-wealthy trees.

And how would that make America great again?

Exactly,
that is a question
the EcoTherapist Cooperative
might help your Republican National Leaders
ask of each other
for restoring Earth Justice,
which, yes,
would also make America great again.

OK. Good.
Let’s set it up.
Did you get your check yet?
You know, don’t tell anyone,
but getting my signature on there
was my pre-election marketing idea.
Have you read my book?

The one where you recommend
Have Fun!
regardless of at whoever’s expense?
regardless of how win/lose competitive?
regardless of how anti-ecotherapeutic?
Yes, I find it helpful
for remembering what not to do
to achieve
and conserve healthy wealth well-being,
safety,
and social communication significance,
both RightHemisphere resonant
and LeftHemisphere resilient.

Good; you read it.
Did you buy it full price retail
or get it out of the library,
I wonder.
Anyway, are you having fun yet?
with that check I sent you.
Don’t forget to vote
if we ever have an election.
I’m not sure we really need one right 20/20 now,
with the lamestream media
and those radical socialist immigrants
trying to get in
and take all our StraightWhiteMale jobs
and the deep leftist anti-intelligence State
and…

Hopefully, Not To Be Continued

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