Tag Archives: dying

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RearView Mirror

Why does a powerful moment of passion,
of inspiration
often feel like need for immediate ego-expiration,
harvesting over-filled compassion?

Why a need to breathe in
followed by back out exhalation
to share, virally spread
a tool for relationship-building
through impassioned out-pathic communication?

Why does a moment of life lived fully,
ecologically co-relational,
often feel accompanied by an ego-death copay?
Theologically disconnected,
released,
lost,
yet ecologically reconnecting
repurposing regenerations.

Why does quality of mortal health
come at quantitative cost
of immortal self-sacrifice?

Why does faith
lived fully in multiculturing community
often derive from win/lose fragmented loss
of over-powering theological confluence,

Why does
stagnant tolerance substitute for dynamic peace,
win/lose patience for win/win well-being,

Why do monotheistic aspirations replace catholic global consciousness,
and why does eternal damnation overcome timeless compassion?

Why does climate health
often feel like a reborn end
to global win/lose climates
of pathology?
Internal yin as external yang
right mind as co-present left brain
ecofeminist as non-patriarchal experience
green integrity as immortal red strength’s potential
resonance as harmonic
interdependently polyphonic as universally polypathic
past eulogy as promised future integrity?

Why mortality
of secularized, segregated ego
rather than immortality
of EarthTribe’s sacred trans-regenerations?

Why spatial polypathic quantities, degenerating
rather than
temporal polyphonic qualities, regenerating?

Why left brain either/or dominant
rather than
right mind both/and prominent
yang yintegrity?

Why zeroism’s empty future information
rather than zeroistic fully inspired past exformation?

Why depressive ego-dying
rather than impressive eco-living?

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Uncategorized

Final Farewell

Enjoy our parting day
the young girl child,
now full-grown wise Elder,
reminded me,
the brother she had taught to flex male muscle
without overbearing her Sister Gaia powers.

On this classic sun-baptizing fragrant May morning,
reflecting this same gently caressing day I was born
into earlier centuries of flowering cultures,
she prepares to leave me
perhaps forever
as the length of our pilgrimage together
grows long enough to tip more poignant hello
into operatic final exit goodbyes.

I remember what I might have felt at two,
when she joined me
inviting me into our special shared world,
loving our polycultural identities,
nondual twins since infant-fairy magic,
not having previously known
how lonely love is without her.

Now, to stare remaining years ahead
without seeing and feeling her morning through evening present voice,
facing my own ecology of each Ego identity dying alone,
inevitably without her, or anyone,
dying without incarnate memories
of unconditionally cooperative and active love.

I remember
at two or three,
toddling outdoors in my most terrifying wild ways
exploring gardens and barns
chickens and pigs and milkcow domesticated wildness,
and returning to your crib to report back
all these wonderful worlds we would welcome
if you could only learn to walk and talk
with me.

I need not say farewell
as I learn to see forward as dying
into these deep rich memories
of learning to walk and talk with Sister Gaia’s Welcome,
yet sometimes tipping, Wagon.

Chauvenist anthro-elitism
disappears as we stop over-investing in dominant negative
competitive
Yang, outweighing Yin’s more integrally inclusive flow powers,
politically and economically,
personally and as a species,
intergenerationally and cross-culturally
now under-invested in polyculturing mutual-equity cooperative investments.

What is our mutual time-investment balance on this farewell date?
Do our mutual equity values line up, match, balance, absorb any lifetime losses?
Sister Gaia’s regenerative trends
grow ever deeper cooperative equity-reinvestment designs,
plans,
policies and procedures for further self and other development
through EarthTribe Revolutions,
PolyPathic EcoConsciousness,
WinWin Life as LoveGame Health Theory.

We give evil, dissonant farewells,
nondual negative Janus-faces of Yang/Yin imbalance
power
by seeing these toxins and poisons
and personifications of eviL,
as other than absence of good
Yang/Yin balanced nutritional Co-Creation Stories.

This Final Farewell Memory
eternally coarising
Earth’s Embryonic UnFolding
of Love as stretching BiLateral Time’s Black Hole
(0)Rigin Tipping MidWay ReVolutions
Yang(+) = Yin(-,-)
ThermoDynamic Prime Eulerian Co-ReGenerative Universal Function
Intelligent ZenZero Tao-Balanced fractal RNA-iconic-ionic enlightenment
as Time’s bilaterally unfolding regenerate matters
of EarthTribe’s healthy enculturating-revolving futures.

Final Farewell
remembering my original embryonically environmental Hello,
Here We Are
together again-still
incarnating in and out,
back and forth,
up as down,
Yang-out as Yin-in.

While Autumn farewell bears time’s reputation for messy falls from grace,
this is prophesied in spring seedling beginnings
bearing message memories merging coarising births
of EarthTribe multigenerational,
polypathic,
His/Her Creation Story,
coarising nondual identities,
within Earth’s ecology of regenerate-revolving design,
seasonal praxis,
polyculturally deep enriching outcomes,
by turning down RightFisted AnthroSupremacy
to balance Left/Right Zero-Centric EcoSystemic Investment
and divestment, double-negative equivalent
WinWin DiPolarity Outcomes
ReGenerate Network Game Theory Development
of Form
from BiLateral-Temporal Prime Relational (0)-FractalFunction.

Enjoy this parting day
I have so loved beginning again together,
our mutually co-invested Creation Story.

Enjoy our continuing
final farewell day.

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Uncategorized

The Driving License

Which are your points for living
if we all die into cold leaky stink or ash anyway?
What’s the point of dying
if we could otherwise live continuously?

Heading down the river
on AAA rite of ritual passage.
Six years since last I drove this way
not imagining this homing ritual
to drive again
with automating locamoting license
to ambulate for six more years
of what are my points for living thru
we all die anyway.

Last time I stood in line
to buy my laminated aging image
of ego’s self-chauffeur,
family van driver
complete with wheelchairs
and alternatively designed adult strollers
strolling on toward sixty-four,
I was so sure fifty-eight
must be my last point of dying
to live no more than five more.

I was deadly tired of fighting
every air-born disaster.
My brilliant friends of young adulthood,
generation of young Aquarian post-anger management potential,
all gone.
Whether their hearts still beat for more time
and we yet breathe Earth’s air together,
or whether everless time
to laugh thru our points of dying
into otherwise life’s discontinuous absence.

Alone we stand in that last license line
another anonymous generation
of those who will not rejoin our transmillennial lines,
wondering at this climatic mystery
of ever-vanishing life cycles,
after the last grandparent’s child dies
siblings and cousins look about
furtively at each other,
over our shoulders,
take him, not me;
take me, not her,
waiting our turn to turn into pillars of dying salt.
We’re next.

Or, is there another chapter,
postscript of revolutionary eco-warrior proportion,
EarthTribe SuperLiving Hero?
I wonder as I wait
to review my new ancient-streaming vision,
remembering when my brother turned toward sixty-four
remembering this was our male year
of dying dad standing alone in his last license line.
He did not see sixty-five,
year of full socially retiring commodification
for those uniting states
of freedom’s mythic evolutionary becoming,
reverse cultural face
of mutual enslavement
to cannibalistic ownership of minds
with humane-spirited bodies;
gardeners of social justice health
confused about where we lost our points thru living
as if dying to automating ego-ugly licenses,
carbon footprint excesses wiped on the backs of servitude,
hubris for yet more lines
with already too much space between;
I sleep amazed with wonders of dying points
toward life’s more optimal unfolding,
readers writing more published nutritional words
than writers could ever possibly live wisely enough to read
with deep digestive wisdom.

I see a frail thinner sinner,
this new, still embryonically warm, face of Elder,
farming memories of HIV doctors
and earthy nurses
surprised about my winning age
as oldest survivor on their list
not yet deleted,
pointing to my living
as iconic of divinely graceful dying,
living thru and yet beyond my own AIDS EcoWarrior time,
beneficiary of unfathomable loss
of brilliant firey minds
with anciently plagued bodies,
Positive viral incubators
of Lose-to-Lose biochemistry,
anti-synergetic loss of life
thru ugly dis-eased dying
thru dark self-engagement
unto demise…

Driving back upriver,
against regeneration’s need for fertile tides,
I wonder what I could fade into at seventy.
Would my automated license issue vaporous ghosts?
Or perhaps a host of memories
not imagined when sixty-four
raised so many points for dying
thru living poured out
warm embers lighting faces of love
along my way upriver
toward homes with mysteriously functional,
puzzlingly polycultural, families
surrounded by EarthTribe cousins
living and dying interdependently,
like trees shedding seeds
pointing toward next line’s regenesis.

Which are my points for living,
those times I am dying to repeat?
What is my pointed dying
thru life’s relicensed visits?
Arriving back in EarthTribe’s Home

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Uncategorized

Haunting Endless Waves

What co-arises together
must co-exhale to part.

Last night my HIV+ hunted down my negative,
my darkside,
death and fear,
my anger about my mortality,
my greater anger about our mortality as a species,
my greatest anger about our mortality as Earth’s DNA/RNA Tribes of Life,
that we all are so wrong and pointless
given limitations of our time’s memory
riding,
hiding,
hunting inside our skin
for how to not let this incarnate hunt ever end.

Yet, with dawn’s light,
solely this haunting by endless nothingness,
as if we had never become, so never been,
this fear of death and anger against its organic final demand,
we hope to end
with seamless faith in eternally timeless ego-identity.

Where did this ego emerge from?
Endless nothingness?
Or, a paradise womb of cooperative eco-normics,
eco-logically self-optimizing nutritional health,
perfect temperature care,
nurturing co-abundance
between this seed of ego and this Mother Earth Elder EcoSystem,
sufficient well-being wealth
which, as decomposed,
became exegetical syntax,
elements with dynamic flows and functions
progenerated by co-arising gravity of time’s folding
and refolding revolutions,
the stardust structure of Father Time’s seasonal
reasonal
primally relational language.

How do we ecologically reason and induce,
expand and contract,
regenerate and decompose,
produce and consume,
this emergent hypothesis about ego’s deadly nondual co-arising,
inevitability?
Just how frightening and maddening is this,
to embrace
absorb
devour
soak up
co-prehend
co-science
co-arise to co-decompose
integrative/disintegrative folds
of cosmologically progenitive
dual-destiny transparent
Eco-Time’s co-arising/co-densing identity?

Those who surf our co-arising together

learn to co-exhale dismount
to co-arise the waves of future’s time
now always co-densively logic-present.

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