Uncategorized

Fear of Success

Fear of personal
and disconnecting
ego-success
feels reasonable to me

Too much adulating feedback
from old friends vaguely envious
that I would place myself above
and before them
sacrifices integrity
more resonant with us,
immersed in ecosystemic success,
embodied health,
resilient Earth-rooted wealth.

Children
especially straight white physically-privileged adolescents,
have grown self-empowerment rights
to autonomous personal lifestyle differences,
risks of failure,
opportunities toward narcissism,
as contested by parents
who often have our own anthropocentric issues
about humane success and failure.

Democratically grateful adults
have grown rights to self-determination
responsibility of personal con-science
consciousness authority
over-against God/Gaia,

Completing the circle
of young developing secular ego-systems
competing
rather than cooperatively owning and managing
appreciating immersion within
sacred ecosystemic Earth.

Perhaps LeftBrain’s WinLose risk
is also RightBrain’s WinWin opportunity
to aspire toward resilient God/Gaianess,
as bicamerally GoldenRuled together
ego/eco-systemic nest.

Standard
Uncategorized

The NonTaoist Dialogue

It was observed
among NonTaoist elders,
without formal resolution,

It is past virtuous recycling time
to actively hope future EarthTribe generations
will become smaller
and live more simply
or not live at all.

So what, then,
is left for ego memories to future heal,
to influence in some positively therapeutic way?
What success could remain
when wealth of quantitative healthy generations
must compete ever more relentlessly
against an angry and revengeful Mother Nature
only to die off into extinction
more slowly?

WiseElders note
no need for egocentric immortality
of humane and sacred nature,
yet our ecocentric cooperative successes
become contagious multiculturing conversations,
healing as we dance between
letting go of wealth-aggressive capitalism
to grab hold of health-assertive capitalization,
more cooperative co-investments
across multi-generations of memory,
regenerative images
recreating future generations,
smaller and cooperatively health/wealth wiser
in some mysteriously perennial nature/spirit
dipolar
co-arising
cooperatively self-governing
economic and political
psychological and neurological
unitarian, but not monoculturally uniform,
polypathic/polyphonic Way

We concluded
this NonTaoist elders dialogue
without formal universal-health/unitarian-wealth
cooperative win/win
sweet-spot resolutions,
yet also without further feeding
raw-spot multi-degenerational divested
patriarchally competitive
fragmenting
lack of sufficient integral/spiritual/natural ecosystemic wisdom
to share with both past and future cooperative regenerations,
regardless of size or time,
gender or age

But not at all regardless
of viciously competitive capitalism
or virtuously cooperative capitalization.

Standard
Uncategorized

Organic Gratitude

Eastern stars light our responsibility
to ease ridiculously democratic suffering of Other.
Western horizons speak not of suffering
much less death as inevitable failure.

Dark horizons speak of pain,
and how to avoid it through Other as ourselves.

Eastern lights speak through gratitude
while Western dialects flow full ego-powered self-love.
Yet, in either case,
belief in trust meets feeling co-empathic
nutritional flows of patterned rhythm,
regeneration.

Eastern powers endorse political becoming of mindful midway relationships,
where Western gravity pulls toward ponderous efficiency
pounding out our own manifestly autonomous destiny.

We were wrong to aspire toward effectiveness
in absence of maturing mindfulness,
preforming our intent
as discerned through daily practices of consciousness.

An empty economic effectiveness cart
leads our politically suffering horse
without grace.
Empty cart-drawn horses
crippled,
imprisoned,
marginalized,
suboptimized power of potential ecoconscious balance,
bound to backward stumble.

It feels wrong to lose grace of present gratitude
in pursuit of love’s insured future effectiveness.
Gratitude attitude,
affective midway gestalt
essential to growing empathic trust capacity for love,
for mutual erotic pleasure
and agapic creativity,
mutual political grace with beauty,
body laughter with creative minds
celebrating health-inspiring life.

We evolve wrong to become so satiated by our effectiveness
we swim in delusion that we will avoid feeling pain
by ignoring universal suffering.

As we grow in capacity to integrate gratitude with suffering re-membered,
we will emerge a species embarrassed to allow delusions of suffering alone.

Suffering, like gratitude,
could become radically egalitarian,
reflecting no more or less than our separateness;
and it is this egalitarian separateness of ego identities
that entices us toward gratitude for hope
that you will notice and care for me as my extended family,
and I for you and our extending co-empathic trust as family
flying solidarity of suffering remembered
back to twined roots articulating
feeding polypathic ecoconsciousness
of Eastern stars with Western horizons.

Last remnants of a tattering Industry Evolution,
this Last PreMillennial ReGeneration
passes a too toxic baton as gift-gratitude-forward.
Nakedly embarrassed with fumbling ineptitude,
precisely where we had prayed so earnestly for powerful co-redemption.
Yet perhaps we also flirt with delusion that we did not do our best
with allowing our Cooperative PowerHorse to lead
whether our cart was recessively empty of gratitude
or abundantly overloaded with suffering.

But now,
these PostMillennial ReGenerators,
first tier of ReVolution’s Golden Age,
will continue to learn ecosystemic health regeneration
through small and great suffering/gratitude transitions.

This is our call to vocation,
to holiness,
to grateful suffering with Earth’s recycling passions,
to regenerate Earth’s emptying cart of nurturing produce,
to watch and listen,
to sing and march and dance,
to understand and incarnate
how and why and when we are most grateful to Become this Earth,
simulcast anthem echoing through each cell and cellphone,
across every heart and lap and laptop,
every radio and monitor
in every prison,
every asylum,
every shelter,
every school and capital and mind,
every tear in every eye a suffering tear of gratitude
for belonging to each naked Other,
investing in each Other’s respect
by caring for ourselves as each Other,
as one EarthTribe.

We can do this;
as we become this wilderness world together
bound by relentlessly effective gratitude.

Standard
Uncategorized

Suicidal Notes

Do you sometimes wonder about your self identity
seen through your lens for suicidal risk as opportunity?

It interests me that this lens
evolves as we age.

In later adolescence,
we often look in the face of transition
from good nutritional outcomes on a small stage
about to enter more competitively sharkish waters
within a significantly larger landscape.

Or so I focused my lens in my younger lack-time of wonder.
Not sure why or how these same transitions did not also apply
to nearly all those nonsuicidal 18-24 year olds,
enjoying a more Positive Psychology.

But now, in later adulthood,
I more often look in the face of a potential suicide
as one with at best mediocre outcomes
on a too-small stage,
often familial, or lack thereof,
about to enter no stage at all,
thinking maybe why postpone this mortal inevitability
of decay.

From younger suicides,
“What would be the point of continuing
this WinLose Game,
when we all feel RealTime drill,
you never clearly win
until you stop losing,
and you never stop losing,
until you stop playing.
Clearly I am about to lose
what I don’t feel all that great about
ever having won
at others’ expense.”

From older suicides,
“What was the point
of taking so long
to end this rigged Lose to Lose
death-embracing game
called life?”

It feels like these despair and suffering questions
co-arise within exponentially more of us,
asking echoing silos
as our encultured Earth moves
into a new revolutionary millennium.

Given the now nearly inevitable demise
of our polyculturally and climatically climaxing
exterior and interior lenses
of healthy hope v. toxic pathological
and monocultural decline
of ecological
and economic
and political balance,
how do we know
we are more than an overpopulating parasitic blight
riding Earth’s mortuary-in-waiting
where Elders remind was once
a healthy regenerative place
to continue living?

Yet it is so important to notice
not only all despairing souls
jumping off roofs
but also healthfully repairing souls
building polyculturally positive-deviant landscapes
of organic and synergetic opportunity,
cooperative networks of resonant resolve
sounding Time’s dipolar appositional
issues of despair as opportunities to repair,
still seeking reasonable,
yet deviant,
hope for shared regenerational vocations,
with WinWin reiterating integrity.

No ego is autonomously responsible
for feelings or thoughts,
ideation or even beliefs.
So it is no one’s right to judge feelings,
our own feelings,
the feelings-beliefs-ideas of others
as unacceptable or somehow cosmically dysfunctional,
condemning or worthy of global applause
is to take all that we have been given
far too personally,
too unrealistically removed from comparative
and nuancing context
to discern how we might choose to carry on.

It is our responsibility,
personally, and as a species,
to notice trends of suffering and despair,
compared to trends of multisystemic diversity,
polycultural density of nutritional choices,
ranges of harmonic freedom and healthy cultural balance,
as they appear to reflect
and not reflect
our shared experience to date.

Not to judge and condemn failures and despair,
but to praise our most regenerative successes
and love for equitably accessible hope
to include all Earth’s cooperative economy
among our emerging synergetic Tribe
of curious interests.

Standard