Uncategorized

Black Life Shatters

My oldest son,
one of the few Earth-mattering
Earth-shattering
Black lives
I was made to protect
to guide
by eco-righteous WinWin acts
and co-passioning words,

Felt, and therefore was, disempowered,
worthless,
like helpless prey among predators
who listen to the same rap,
same urban Earth writes,
same multicultural performances,
When a gun was dispassionately pointed at his head.

This was only tangentially about an economic exchange
primal, personally and politically, targeted.

He felt violated,
and threatened,
already home and identity invaded,
when forced to hand over his car keys,
and the back door
and front door
keys to his home.

He knows these guys,
where to find them on Facebook,
at the casino,
in the dance and rap clubs
where he invested
infested
while still in high school.

Urban night school, unEarthly,
earthy
darkly sensual.

He does not know where to find them in church.
Gospel music is for grandmothers.
Liturgical dance,
sacred rituals,
are for outside romance
on warm wet wombed erotic nights.

He felt naked
exposed
terrified when they demanded his last dime.

This is his biggest and baddest bully,
his most deeply echoing “LOSER!”
His darkest dirge
speaking of suicidal revenge.

Or prison,
where Earth’s great white patriarchal State,
will put a gun to his head
and force him to remove his clothes
and bend over
to assume the even more lost position,

Raped of any future hope
to rest outdoors
after an ecstatic liturgical dance
under a romantic full moon
rapping
and dancing
ultra-violet variations
on a warm wet wombed
bright delight.
Not So Bright Delight

You talk our talk
like Black Lives Matter,
but you walk your own walk
as Black lives shatter,
Brown lives stutter,
Green lives splinter.

What’s a-matter?

You want to want
all lives to splatter?
Might hear to hear
RealTalk ain’t chatter,

You eat to eat
friends heads on platters.
We taste to see
your fake get fatter.

Your act is tired.
Your allies scatter.
You need to feed
on guns’ disaster.

Come on now, Felix,
What’s a-matter?
Where’s your commitment
to Black Lives Matter?

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Uncategorized

Touching With Kindness

Some parents and cooperative school teachers
and classroom and bus aides and drivers
are discussing government regulations
restraining transportation providers
from providing therapeutic touch,
because of an over-compensation
for emotional dysfunction behaviors
leading to appallingly irreverent touch.

Toxic touch critical events
predict long-term non-lifegiving,
non-wellbeing consequences
in young
vulnerable,
transparently frustrated learners

Typically,
healthily born with WinWin internal/external co-relational cognitive assumptions,
confluent expectations,
positive neural receptivity is therapeutic
while negative interceptions are toxic,
pathological.

We discuss our unhappiness
about current administrative restraints
on giving healthy therapeutic touch,
but no such caring restrictions apply
to receiving healthy
appropriate
therapeutic touch
from our wounded,
Win/Lose fragile,
fragmented,
cognitive-affective dissonant disarranged
kids.

We seem to be heading in a direction
that would more positively hypothesize,
Despite past risks of exposure to toxic touch,
and apathetic untouch,
we do not want to restrain therapeutic touch
with our arms and hands,
our feet walking and dancing in cooperative solidarity,
stepping out rhythmically, together
with our voices of kindness,
mouths speaking and singing
with ringing patterns of kindness,

Integrity fully-embodied
to support resilient WinWin therapeutic touch relationships.

One of my daughter’s school transportation providers
learned therapeutic massage from a yogi,
Who began their first hands-on learning class
by reassuring those about to receive a student’s touch,
and those about to give their first intentionally focused massage,
that there is only one mistaken choice to avoid,

Massage, any form of verbal or non-verbal touch,
turns from therapeutic default
through toxic abandonment of communication, untouched apathetic restraint,
and also when too aggressive, much more so when actively violent,

Toxins,
nonverbally and/or verbally non-communicating counter-therapies
are Win/Lose neural neglect,
lack of therapeutic mindfulness,
to not touch by therapeutic intent at all,
whether with our WinWin intending hands
or solidarity voices
or any other of Earth’s neural receiving and giving
eco-therapeutic receptors.

So, I remind my daughter
of what the yogi message therapist said,
We only want to touch with kindness,
With our hands
and with our voices,
with our preferably dancing bodies
and our more therapeutically singing mouths
and signing hands
and signaling feet.

Her transport team listens,
laughs,
maybe a touch more relaxed
about possibilities for therapeutic WinWin touching
wounded Win/Lose dis-encultured students
on their often too-neglected journeys
in well-being life-skills
for enhancing healthy wealth resilience.

While us caregiving adults
continue to cooperatively talk without touching
among our comparatively privileged selves.

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Uncategorized

Dear Ivy

Dear Ivy,

I am sorry we did not receive even just a moment to say goodbye
and thank you to each other
for all those school bus rides we took together,
you in your harness,
and me in my wonder
about what’s coming next
from your talking head
to mine.

It is time for me to move on
to another student,
but I am happy to leave you in Miss Josie’s care.

I know she will enjoy your time
invested in each other,

Listening and taking turns speaking kindly with each other,
Singing and maybe even a little dancing together,
reading and drawing as light and bumps allow.

Maybe you can teach each other
some new KnockKnock jokes.

KnockKnock.
Who’s there?
Sandi.
Sandy who?
Sandy sandwiches
are not good for you.

KnockKnock.
Who’s there?
Josie.
Josie who?
Jo see for yourself,
Open the door!

I am grateful to have so many silly and lovely memories
of you
to take with me.

And, the greatest farewell gift you could give me
is your reassurance
that these same warm and happy memories
of us
are what you will carry with you
throughout your great adventurous journey
into well-being.

Warmly yours,

Sandi

Sandi who?
Sandy snacks
are not so good for you.

Note:

My behaviorally disordered ADHD and fetal alcoholic daughter, with abandonment issues and deep-seeded food anxiety issues, suddenly lost her long-standing school bus aide, probably to compassion burn-out.  Ivy can be a profound motivator of impatience in those around her, even with deep and widely developed caregiving and receiving skills. This is the farewell that I think Ivy would have found more therapeutic than the isolating complexities of disappearance without explanation or expressed gratitude for what did co-relationally work for so long.

To be clear, not saying goodbye was an administrative decision from above; not what Ivy’s aide wanted for herself or for Ivy.

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Uncategorized

Therapeutic Tinted Thoughts

Therapeutic thoughts have feelings
of resonance and dissonance
as healing behaviors have internal beliefs
motivating
inspiring spirited resilience
and passions for love
surpassing anger,
compassion
conquering all dispassions,
positive attraction
reconnecting past negative revulsions.

Feelings have internal colors
compassionate green health environments
and narcissistic snarky red hot interiors
and radiant blue light
and absorbing yellow warmth,
and many multiculturing other hues
and cries for resonant ultra-violet peace
with black and white and brown restoring justice
not so much grey-scaled punishments
for too liberally
compassionately coloring outside
proper eco-political WinLose lines,
social walls of propriety
against impropriety of full-scale wildly imaginative colors.

When I heard Caillou’s white-speak mother
inform her son,
Red is the correct Valentine’s color of love,
I knew this could not be my whole virtuous enculturing story
because red is also the color of bloody fraternity
and viciously escalating anger,

Healthy passioned red
or short-flaring diseased fear
of overpowering betrayal,
losing power to overcome
threats to green therapeutic self-portrayal,
regenerative esteem
virtuously red-blooded,

Surrounded and benignly invaded
by green nature,
yellow absorbing internal blue heedfulness,
caution,
discerning nurtured feelings
attributed by more dissonant color relationships
said and sung in virtuously harmonious major,
and viciously dissonant minor, keys,
round co-relational octaves of color
revolving rhythmic qualities fueling flow,

Morally affluent yang prescriptions
with ethically effluent yin descriptors
of exterior green sanctuary natures
with interior red-blooded
DNA ultra-violet
communicating nonultra-violent
recycling nurture wheels
of resiliently felt therapeutic thoughts.

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Uncategorized

More Therapeutic Investments

If my behaviors,
for ill or good,
are embedded in my belief system,
recognized by internally articulating our apparently shared faith
in social sanctuary structures,
habitats,
safe co-operative homes,

Then my actions feed all my psychological
and economic
and political
and educational
and ecologically imagined co-relationships,

Whether I believe good ecosystemic compassion
is more vital
efficacious
powerful
transparent
vulnerable
than smaller
isolated
autonomous
hidden egocentric narcissism,
or not.

Whether we are logic nurtured children
of positive natural outside faith,
or egospirit neglected negative faithless anti-compassion narcissistic subjects
of our own internal jealous angry GodVoices
speaking Negative SuperEgo words
of denatured depression and dispiriting doom.

Even toxic Creators of forbidding deforesting climates
preferentially prefer behaviors
of and for a more robust personal and social health Vocation.

If behaviors,
for health or pathology,
are embedded in natural exterior experience histories,
then actions feed all polypathic paradigms
for learning compassionate spiritual beliefs
in non-sectarian health vocations
swimming in temporal streams of divine nutrition
nurturing humane natural beliefs
widely teaching
deep learning resilient behavioral missions
for sustaining EarthTribe climate life,
healthy beliefs inside as wealthy behaviors outside.

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Uncategorized

Music Therapy

My LeftBrain is busy reading a book
on what Systems Theory
and thinking
and experience find encouraging
for WinWin social change,
where no losers are allowed to fail
at thriving away from WinLose capital stuckness
in everyday mundane egocentrism,

But,
at the same time
my RightBrain is trying to imagine how to share
scat jazz vocal experiments
so other sanctuary choir members
can have the same celebratory
and non-violent communication through music appreciation
that is in my practice
practice
and procedure skill-set,
more intuitive,
and less LeftBrain deductive.

I get to the bottom of my first paragraph today
and realize something has gone quite wrong
or right
and probably not not seductively wrong
so perhaps intuitively and inclusively correct,
true to nurtured experience,
helpful,
effective,
viable,
healthy.

I reread
and realize I’m not only writing in bracketed commentary
but also substituting a music paradigm
for a therapeutic systems change paradigm.

“The [vocal jazz] group
also identified several [harmonic] strategies
as shown in [chord and rhythmic flow notations]
on the importance of [diverse] community engagement.”

“[Jazz note and timing choices] capture the value
of asset mapping to identifying
and bridging [musical] opportunity gaps.”

“[Scat jazz] affirms the [political democratic empowerment] importance
of [not just LeftBrain] planning
for the built [notation] environment.”

“[Cleft, rhythm and key] Factors in the upper left corner
of the [two-voice] diagram
that impact the target [listener’s auditory] constraints
are [trebleYang and bassYin] shown.”

“Finally, in its [scaled octave] line[s]
at the bottom [through top] of the [musical] diagram,
the [jazz ensemble] acknowledge
the importance of [vocally] shifting [Left and Right, treble and bass]
mental models
throughout the [improvisation] process.”

Seems like a long-winded LeftBrain way of saying
Go with your flow of harmonic/dissonant options
to achieve our highest and best healthy enriching choices
together
as both performers
and interactive listeners,

But, some people don’t get RightBrain lost in the details
like I do,
so maybe some musicians,
wanting to make more resonant systemic change choices,
would find it helpful
for group jazz karaoke night
improvising green sanctuary social change
through harmonic solidarity.

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Uncategorized

Dear Sue

Dear Sue,

I am remembering our strong negative responses
to the young woman who surreptitiously read
her aunt’s very private diary,
filled with vulnerable statements
of the most intimate nature
and transparently lusty spirit,

Yet, though secretive,
then took a bold black marker
and wrote vulgar, poisonous words
on most every previously locked and hidden page,

And yet, even here
she used her own judgmental inside voices
but wrote in her younger innocent brother’s hand.

We both found her choices highly distressing;
difficult to even read, imagine
squeamish to hear from a young niece perpetrator
or an old aunt victim.

I wonder if this is because we can empathize with both
the obstreperous and egocentric young, disturbed
with adult hidden and disruptively vulnerable agendas,
rebellions,
sometimes hedonistic
sometimes narcissistic,
usually both, back and forth
like yang then yin,
patriarchal power lust, then matriarchal depression
in response to chronic economic and political repression.

Do these actions,
intimate hidden self-disclosures
followed by a too yangishly adolescent monoculture’s mocking inspiration,
venomous uncaring,
toxically rapacious expressions,
aggressive actions and word choices,
with fully uncensored malicious intent,
speak to deep listening
yet camouflaged through deflection,
distraction,
political sleight of hand,
giving off responsibility to some,
most any, Other
our own wounded skeletons of silent memory?

Powers brought to a very exclusive co-arising table of one,
acting as a duplicitous two,
bipolar in passive-aggressive
depressive-manic responses
to surprising disclosures
of older, respected, staid hidden agendas
written by those we have truly loved
and hoped to continue loving
without remainder, reserve,
without this unexpected erupting hidden agenda
to protect ourselves from what feels creepy
too manic or paranoid,
smelling of hidden conspiracies
to express attraction
in ways deviant from our own proper expectations
for our own,
and Other’s, therapeutic integral behavior.

I thought of that wicked niece,
and our responses to her perfidy,
after a dream last night
in which Donald Trump
was writing curse words
with a bold black marker
in his dominant RightWing hand
all over his concrete wall

And then all over the original Jeffersonian Declaration
of Interdependence
away from white narcissistic,
patriarchal,
unenlightened royal privilege

And then Sorcerer’s Apprentice Trump
ruthlessly
blackly wrote dirty jingoisms on,
stabbing at,
our original Adams and Jeffersonian
compromised democratic constitution

Written with compassionate radical trust intention
trying to declare all creatures,
slave and free,
enlightened plants and planet,
equal in everyday enchanting dignity,
assuming great prosperity benefits of polycultural cooperative economies
internationally fertile,
valid,
effective for well-being
of all the people,
plants,
planet,

Still to this Trumpian day falling politically short,
still awaiting fulfillment
by those who can read and write more skillfully,
non-violently
less passive-aggressively,
less conspiratorially
less toxically enraged by WinLose multicultural losses
across the pages of our transparently democratic
yet divine
intent.

Anyway,
it seems we recognize this aversion to hidden narcissism
through empathy, cooperatively empassioned
in each other as a polypathic strength
strongly shared.

Thank you for speaking in solidarity
for a healthier, effluent ecofeminist affluent flow power
as we read across the pages of our own hopeful history books,

Still holding old school faith
found in each other’s passioned eyes and ears
and relentless spiritual-natural senses
of positive and negative and double-negative humors,
tumors benign and cancerous
rumors of magical queendoms
at our open liberal loving left hand,

Where agendas may be hidden
but not from shame or blame weapons
so much as reserved for our own tool-shaping pleasure
to disclose when and as we choose
and as our gifts for compassionate co-empathy
are most multiculturally needed,
exercised,
stretched toward optimally resonant
resilience for all people,
young nieces and old aunts certainly included,
and MotherTrees
and humbler passioned plants
and MotherLanded planet.

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