Uncategorized

My History of Mystery

We are ecological science
and con-science
and unconsciousness.

We are story
and egological storyteller
and unknown
unheard
unseen.

Earth’s humane act
and actor
and theologically transcendent stasis.

The dance
and dancer
and deaf
and frozen

The song
and singer
and silent
muted
anticipation
and anxiety.

The play
and player
and absent
uninvited
worker.

The thought
and thinker
and feeler
and numb.

The garden
and gardener
and consumer
and starving.

The Earth
and EarthTribe
and Ego
and Interdependent
DNA and RNA place-timed relatives,
matriarchal regenerators
regenerations
degenerations
ungenerated energy
entropy
untropy
anti-morphic
metamorphic
metaphor.

We are leftbrain either/or polynomial
rightbrain polyphonic
ecopolitically polypathic
positive trust energy democracies
health/wealth
ego/ecosystems
bilateral
bicameral
binomial nonzero-sum balancing

The science story,
and consciousness storytellers
and yet unconscious
unfelt
unknown,

The patriarchal history
of and for eco-matriarchal mystery.

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Uncategorized

Reason To Celebrate

I overheard you say
you are planning a big celebration
for later this year,
when Trump is defeated
for re-election.

I am ready to be invited,
if you would be so kind
to reverse your motives
to celebrating positive alternatives.

I have an uncomfortable memory
that celebrating the former regime’s end
feels alarmingly Trumpian,
rather than introducing a new 2020 green deal
healthier wealth for everyone.

It is this negative anger
growing to more negative fear
that most defeats our capacity to touch each other
with mutual trust,
democratic health,
civil trust in a wealthier future together
than climatically apart.

Earth yields some clues
warmly regarding necessary and sufficient ingredients
for a healthy swamp,
a positive capital co-investment,
an economically resilient,
politically resonant,
multiculturally effective democracy.

Stuckness
She does not choose to celebrate.
MotherEarth
and EarthMothers of all regenerations
vacuum up and sweep out
intolerance.

A competitive model of capital extraction
rooted in devouring our own habitat,
our own win or lose militarized young,
our Earth’s pathological neglect,
is incompatible
antithetical
to a resiliently healthy eco-democracy
recomposing our own healthy born
win/win expectant
left with right,
not left v right, children.

Healthy robust systems
are cooperatively owned
and multiculturally managed
and polyculturally celebrated
by organic nurturers of ego/eco-resonance,
left and right deep bicameral learning nutrients,
informed by Earth’s democratic history
of multiculturing nutrition,
life,
warm truths and trusts,
integral ways
and ego/eco-democratic robust means

Bicameral
Bilateral intelligence
Binomial double-bound
not not pro-green transitional
great reweaving manifestations,
inaugurations,
cooperatively-owned celebrations
leaving no one behind,

Not even straight white male narcissists,
emotionally wounded children
of all ages and parties,
naked emperors
seeking sycophantic celebrants.

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Healthy Green Democracy

Earth’s health
is robust eco-democratic wealth,
I said
repeatedly
to the growing,
maturing Democracy Works advocate.

The occupying Advocate responds,
Resonant democratic resilience
is an economic
and political climate
of healthiest wealth,
like Mom
and her ApplePie economy
and vanilla chocolate brown Cake
not yet eaten
into total
lifeless
oblivion.

I stop repeating myself,
to listen better,
more democratically
investing smarter.

I’m still eco-politically listening
with growing hope
for 20/20 sensing,
noticing green new deal inclusive celebrations,
planning together,
budgeting cooperative
GoFundMe political parties,
multicultural liturgies,
songs with ego/eco-motions,
cooperative Fullerian Zeroistic ownership,
integral bicameral ego/eco-political co-investment

In warm
co-passionate
non-violent listening
speaking
acting
playing for and with win/win
globally patriotic
positive energy
democracy intention,
Earth’s robust compassionate opportunities

To recall internal/external healthy
green and blue and red climates
of/for
resilient democratic wealth

In global cultures
out local climates
and not not in-between
non-violent
co-passioned mediations.

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Uncategorized

Retiring Nomad River

I finally finished retiring four years ago,
a process that started in my mid-fifties
due to late adopting kids with special needs,
including needs for me to be home
to personally walk them on,
harness them in,
and wheel them back off, their diverse buses
and robotic ramped vans.

During those final weeks of quasi-gainful employment
I amped up my search for a new home
preferably in New London, CT,
because I had visited, and liked, All Souls UU;

But, possibly in Norwich,
where I have some family,
not necessarily white like me,
or someplace more rural
in-between.

Long story short,
which is not like tangential me,
I ended up
or started out,
depending on where this story starts for you
and me
on the south end of Norwich,
just north of the old State Hospital,
seeking healthy justice
above a steep and brooding bank
down to the troubled Thames River.

From here
it is difficult not to notice
how traffic flows
between Norwich and New London.

But, in the case of All Souls UU
and UU Norwich,
not so much,
maybe not enough.

When I lived in the Hartford area
I joyfully attended the Unitarian Society of Hartford,
a fairly large multicultural tent
filled with reviving gospel music.

So, when looking for a retirement destination,
I traveled on-line to uua.org
to see what might be available
in addition to All Souls New London
and found a small cell,
apparently renters quasi-homeless,
Norwich UU,
or UU Norwich,
or maybe both
I hope.

I pictured no choir,
no active faith formation options
for people of all ages
and figured,
probably not right for me.

Long story maybe a little bit short,
it took me over four years
to make my first Norwich UU visit,
recently.

I found somewhat fewer of us
than the number of Norwich residents
on the All Souls Members and ActiveAllies list.

My background is in cooperative economic
and affordable housing development.

With an MDiv from a Catholic seminary
and a double-Master’s in Public Administration
and Community Development
from Southern Illinois,
Carbondale,
where Bucky Fuller once taught
Synergetics,

It feels awkward
to invest in All Souls together
where all souls are welcome,
by commuting back and forth alone in my blue steel truck,
while there is clearly plenty of room
and welcome
available right in my new home town,
where I now know no one except family,
over four years later.

This is a schizophrenic discomfort
for climate activist
and cooperative local community investor
me.

Back in my early adoption years,
I worked in the Office of Urban Affairs,
New Haven,
for the Archdiocese of Hartford,
where I listened to a great deal of turmoil
about aging and poor urban parishes
thinking about how to join forces
to survive
while sharing a clergy ministry team.

So, I wonder
How would it feel to UU Norwich survivors,
activists,
communicants,
healthy and smart registrants to vote local
while thinking global,
to carpool to All Souls on Sunday mornings,
to sit together
in chairs hooked to-gather,
perhaps joined by us other emigrant immigrant
Norwich residents already All Souls affiliated,

To also share a discussion circle
after the chalice light is extinguished
to check in with each other over coffee,
maybe herbal tea,
to reflect on what we heard
and sang
and sometimes endured, today,

To ponder aloud how this speaks
and does not speak
why
and how
and when we arrive together
back in Norwich,
having solved
and resolved to absolve
most of the Thames River watershed issues
rolling back and forth
and swelling in-between
this tidal river’s ups and downs.

Perhaps some of us
or even all of us
would also like to form a Sanctuary Circle
meeting during the week.

Maybe have lunch together,
share our Norwich organizing
and multicultural explorations together,
contribute to All Souls Green Sanctuary
and GRACE anti-racism projects,
restore justice to replace retributive injustice,
speak power with truth,
live together, not apart,
more resiliently.

Perhaps it is possible
to grow more robust
as a distinguished part
of All Souls,
combine resources,
economize cooperatively,
ecologize more holistically
and theologize more healthily
without losing Norwich UU tradition,
focus
mission,
effective
resonance,
green and black and brown and rainbow
resilience.

As for me,
I’m still looking at New London
real estate listings
while troubled about abandoning
a nomad’s home
in which I never let myself fully invest

While dreaming of emigrating further south
downriver toward climatically rising water levels
while still in my first five carbon-burning years
of retiring immigration.

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Uncategorized

Not That You Depressingly Asked

Not that you asked,
or ever would feel free to inquire,
yet perhaps you grow ready to listen
to a voice inviting exit
from your,
and our,
long loneliness,
self-contempt,
isolation so shelled-over,
so embedded,
you are sure we are each and all
unredeemably alone

In our envy of others,
the positive deviants
with apparently healthy organic
and resonant
and resilient relationships

While we remain powerless to conjure enough curiosity
to discover
and/or rediscover
our own win/win potentialities,
personal
and political,
economic
and ecologically regenerative.

Depression conjures
dark apartness messes
all your own too-competitive fault.

But, your depression,
emotional and/or economic,
political and/or environmental,
like my own,
is no more or less your fault
than is Donald Oompa Trumpa President
of all anti-ecological wisdom,
a new ungreen post-millennial oxymoron,
and Earth’s algorithmic degeneration
into lose/lose fragility,

And privileged human SuperEgo’s declention
disarray
dismay
despair into xenophobic rabidity
oligarchical madness
global depression
mutual suppression
liberally invested in every thing
but love,
curiosity
recovering win/win birth canal memory,
a magical moment of hope for Earth’s warm light
of lifetime win/win recovery.

Your depression is your fault
only in this warm right-brain accompaniment sense
of feeling and knowing we are a fluid,
yet stuck, State
that is our shared win/lose fault
of left-brain dominating culture
parsing compassion stingily,
saving for glorious and
win/win right-brain interdependent
un-lonely Rapturous sacred end.

But, as every community organizer
and integral permaculture designer
and restorative justice advocator
knows from win/win v win/lose v loselose
retributive v restorative justice experience,
we cannot end a resilient health-building project
that will include
any and all multicultural win/win faith
if we did not embody already inside
as we began
pushing through our original organic tunnel
toward Earth love’s first light
and unmuted sounds
of greeting,
warm accompaniment
universal co-present love,

Hope
faith in EarthMother’s warm feeding breast
from whence we each compassion came
come
and go.

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Uncategorized

Unbright Intellectual Snobbery

When I was in grade school
I was, already,
on my leftbrain dominant path
toward acting the intellectual snob.

This, in large part
my best offense,
my trump card, sadly,
against marginalizing prejudice
of our community’s non-farmer economic
and political Elite;

The few kids
whose parents went to college
and/or inherited some above-the-norm property
business, preferably not agribusiness,
professional service assets
even the most straight white male
would appreciate
like doctors
and nursing wives,
two income households
with academic bright credentials.

By the time I reached high school
being on, or at least within sight of,
the top of my class,
and president of as much political property as possible,
or at least vice-president,
became my trump card
for getting out of rural SWM oppression,
depression,
suppression,

Where I was not safe,
back in the 1960s rural midwest,
and I could never possibly matter,
become one of the local community’s Elite,
a pillar of church and state
while overcoming the guilt and shame
of being the queer son
of a below median income family farmer.

Intellectual snobbery
was my leftbrain overwhelming defense
against rightbrain amygdala loneliness,
extreme social-sexual isolation,
drowning in cortisol-baptized self-stigmatization.

Leftbrain dominant academic skills
were my best offense
for succeeding out in urban
urbane
multicultural
cosmopolitan
singing and dancing
democratically compassionate
win/win feeling and acting society.

The only healthy society
that mattered;
where I could possibly matter,
and become transparent
and vulnerable
and connected
and safe.

That defensive snobbery
still, in 2020 hindsight,
lives in my deepest closet,
longing for warmer
more inclusive acceptance,
invitation,
compassion

For right brain radical interdependence
with those of us,
regardless of income
and lack thereof,
regardless of self empowerment
and lack thereof,
capable of engaging
and energizing this tragic comedy
of small staged love lives,

Rural and urbane
Healthy and wealthy
Ego and eco-therapeutic
Left and right brained
Smart and warmly co-passionate
Proud and humble

Divinely humane
playing more win/win trump cards
through more cooperative co-investment.

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I Would Like To Listen More

I would like to hear
with no urgent need to speak
and to respond
without reacting,
over-acting.

I would like to hear
your experience with faith and faithless communities,
theistic
and atheistic,
sacred
and secular believers
and unbelievers,
communal investment positive
and fear and anger
flight and fight negative,
healthy
and pathological,
resonant
and dissonant.

And I would like to hear the same
about political power experience,
partisan
and non-partisan,
green democratic
and libertarian republican,
militaristic
and more peacefully resonant
green new deal ecopolitical parties
and win/win games of cooperative discussion
and win/lose strategies of capital-headed competitions.

And I would like to share
our hopes and dreams
of future faith cooperative ownership
and empowerment party management
for public healthy climate resonance
and private wealthy resilience,

I would like to hear us sing
for our win/win democratic cooperative suppers,
expressed in liturgical dance,
unrepressed fire circles
impressing nature/spirit bicamerals
locally through globally contagious
listening cameras.

I would invite us to share
where we have been
and where we would like to journey together
for our own health
and climate resonance,
And so our children
and grandchildren
and their children
will look lovingly back on us
gathered here this and future days
to claim their shared health inheritance,

“In their lunch space
and climate public residential time
of great unraveling,

They didn’t just eat together,
they dined smart
and swallowed multicultural grace
until so full of wealthy health
they learned to sing and dance
to pray and play
to faith and power
our way
toward this very resilient
win/win
sacred/secular
right/left bilateral
warm accompaniment day
of cooperative interdependence.”

Our children will benefit
from our social-psychological wealthy interdependent health,
of course,
but also political-economic binomial equity-investment,
polypathic and also not not polynomial balance
theological and ecological
great reweaving analogical,
metaphoric and polyphonic
20/20 listening.

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Universal-Unitarian Trinity of Zero

Atheism,
for a Taoist
and for U-Us
and Zeroists,
and Not ZeroSumists,
and Positive ZeroZone Therapists,
is synonymous with Agnosticism
and maybe Gnostic BiCameral Consciousness.

Healthy skeptics,
but not pessimists,
Agnostics understand how win/lose leftbrain either/or dominant
intelligent people
confuse Atheism with AntiTheism
but do not internally suffer from these competing
and ambivalent
anxious
depressing confusions.

For both a Taoist philosopher-writer-composer-musician-muse
and a UU multicultural Truth/Power lover,
it feels unbalanced to be open only to appreciating Universal Theists
and closed to the unitarian
interdependently egalitarian AntiTheists among us,
all potential allies along life’s loving theological
ecologically co-relational journey

Just as it is Left with Right hemisphere wrong, both thought and felt,
to accept a culturally reinforced Thesis
but not a multiculturally contextual
appositional
compare and contrast AntiThesis,
like YangStrength with YinFlow,
like Left with Right bilateral unwinged communion,
like Outside with Inside climate solidarity,
like Left Privilege with or against Dark Fragility,
like Elite cooperatively with
or competitively against NonElite,
like Win/Win with Lose/Lose spectral re/de-generativity,
like Ego WealthyIdentity with and against EcoSystemic Healthy Individuation…

Between internal MonoTheistic Spirit
and external AntiTheistic Nature
lies a multicultural pandemic of economic
investing/divesting theologies

Our subjective
and objectively felt personal knowledge
win/lose evolves,
lose/lose revolves,
win/win resolves

I’ve noticed, so far,
along my UU-Taoist journey:
PolyTheism
PanTheism
Zeroism
PanEnthemematic Communionism
MultiCultural Win/Win ReGenerativism
Health/Wealth Nature/Spirit CoOperativism,
sadly, Win/Lose Capitalism

And have no doubt
we will, across eternal time
and timeless space
know and grow
unknown and despised and revised
many more variations
on this Yang/Yin
Thesis/AntiThesis
EgalitarianUniverse Rights / InterdependentUnity Responsibilities
LeftBrain Dominant / RightBrain Prominent
WarmThoughts with FluidFeelings
dipolar co-arising
Ego-Theo-Eco-triumvirate
trinitarian without capital
heady
egotistic
narcissistic over-investment in Trumpistic Triumphalism
of leftbrain autonomous illusion

Truth and Beauty and Trust
actively looking for
easier not not co-passion themes
of past faith
with future hope
for today’s sufficient love.

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Uncategorized

Breathing’s Righteous Purpose

You and I may have decided
long ago,
and again more recently,
more ego-centrally
and now more large-stage ecopolitically,
that human life
has only that meaning and purpose we give ourselves,
we choose to embrace,
however ambivalently

And this dissociation from divine
theocratically orchestrated
organized
operational history and culture
leaves us free
but also isolated;
an individual without communally objective identity,
without sacred communion
orthodox portfolio.

You may have thought,
as did I,
a self-assigned secular purpose
could only be subjective,
as free as straight white male law
to become morally arbitrary,

Polypathic liberation without polyphonic natural harmonies
of graced
and original sacred objective intent–
sometimes punishing
and other times therapeutic–
sometimes both retribution against subjects
and therapy with and for redeemed objects.

YOu may have thought God is as dead
as planet Earth will one day be,
and there is no realistic
natural or spiritual escape route,

No heavenly and eternal paradise Rapture
for the Elect,
much less the merely subjective NonElect
like wounded
isolated
mortal
autonomous ego
me.

I may have come to hope
we push through in-between
nihilistic subjective freedom
to choose win/lose competititons
between leftbrain wealth
of chosen verbal knowledge
and rightbrain health
of meaningful connection
back through generations
regenerating self and other selected purpose
to reconnect Father straight white male God
with MotherEarth CareTaker CreationGiver

Choosing DNA’s secular/sacred
healthiest/wealth of opportunity
to choose vocational purpose
rejoining Earth’s win/win CareTaker leftbrain intent
either/or
win or lose
with EarthMother’s CareGiver rightbrain
composing interdependent CoPassion’s
eco-habitual
co-operational meanings.

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Born of CareTakers

Born of wombs
for premeditated health
and restoring nutritional wealth,

We might warmly anticipate
a more win/win democratic living Earth communion,
more like an organic gardening womb
than a lose/lose political capital-overinfested swamp,
filling in with unhealthy communities,
filling in with dysfunctional nuclear-ballistic families
and tribes,
filling in with shame and blame starving
thirsting
habitat-less
unwarmed
isolated self-righteous
non-leftist individuals,

Longing to return
from whence we Earth CareTaker came.

Before wounded parents
and win/lose mentors and teachers
of competitive debate
and not cooperative
civil civic discussion
began our partisan disloyal-to-Earth debates.

Wounded left-brain dominant verbal
win/lose
either/or debate enculturation,
is important as a first step
to understand our chosen
and/or assigned,
bought and paid for
health/wealth cooperative position
to defend
and grow
and win
with either my way
or Earth’s benighted highway.

But, wounded parents,
mentors,
teachers,
preachers are apt to omit the second step
of debate preparation:
Get into your opponent’s head(s).
What will they say
do
think
feel
to persuade your shared audience,
if not you,
that your Earth CareTaker position
is, in fact, not healthy
not wealthy,
not robustly rightbrain resonant
and profoundly leftbrain resilient?

Will they say you are well intended
but are too liberal
in your polypathic/polyphonic love?

Will they find your healthy longings
for ecological and theological intersectionality,
secular and sacred interdependence,
too extravagant,
too ambitious,
too liberal,
too costly,
too unsafe,
too naive,
too non-violent for responsible defense
from their own already-anxious win/lose offense?

Our own self-unfulfilling lose/lose
nihilistic
mortal
dissociated
disinvested prophecy?

How will you cooperatively win/win?
How might we regeneratively
resonantly
resiliently respond to courageous curiosity
with warm appreciative inquiry,
with warm accompaniment
remembering way back
to that originally unwounded
and EarthCoPassionate
warm wet womb?

LeftBrain debate may be Earth’s healthy prologue
but RightBrain appreciative warm-felt dialogue
is EarthCare Discerning epilogue;

History
is to Destiny
as win/win polypaths
are to polycultural health/wealth outcomes
for all God’s Earth CareTakers.

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