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Restoring Inside Justice

Healing Win/Lose EgoNomial Intent

We belong together
Through all kinds of colonizing corporate weather,
We belong creolizing together.

So sings my mitochondrial DNA
when I listen deeply
to all prior matriarchal regenerations
speaking in still
soft
timeless win/win voices

Especially about polycultural outcome opportunities
and monocultural injustice
incoming risks.

I am obsessed with anxiety about climate change.
I own this disability to feel safe
sufficiently secure
to feel confident my granddaughter
will live on a healthier Earth,
will live in a wealthier bicameral empowering situation,
will live for a more cooperative win healthy ecology
to win a truly wealthy
resilient domestic economy.

I’m meeting with some folks from an Episcopal Church
inspired by St. James,
sons of the Lesser Alphaeus
and Greater Zebedee
and James the Just
we could matriarchally say,
and an All Souls UniveralYang
UnitarianYin
BiCamerally Liberal ReAssociation.

All folks who share some concern with Adam Robersmith,
about how we might engage each other
to “Cherish Our World:
Avoiding Despair
in Environmental Justice Work.”
(in “Justice On Earth,” Skinner House Books, p. 47)

My RightBrain ear was listening
with those voices from past generations
speaking in present mitochondrial matriarch-restoring voices
to reassure us of timeless compassion
for EarthTribe’s wealthiest ecofeminist future.

Robersmith: “Watching the public debates about climate change is an exercise in resistance.”

The GrandMothers: Listening to internal dialogue
with changing win/lose climates
actively creolizes resonance.

Robersmith: “It involves a resistance to willful ignorance;
resistance to accepting all statements, especially unsubstantiated ones, as facts;
resistance to the despair that can rise within us as we face the public discourse,
the science,
and the toll taken on human communities.”

The GrandMothers: Cherishing our healing justice process
involves a resistance to willful dissociation
from the intolerable;
resistance to internalizing shame and blame communications,
especially unsubstantiated egocentric
narcissistic
anthropocentric elitism predicting universal injustice
as normless facts;
resistance to NonElite despair
rising within us
as we face StraightWhiteMale dominant
corporate debate,
masquerading as win/win discourse,
discerning and restoring market science
despite the toll taken on multiculturally robust communions.

Robersmith: “Unfortunately,
our individual reactions to human-caused climate change
can also be unhelpful
in terms of finding solutions.”

The GrandMothers: Unfortunately,
individual actions to self-caused
and family-caused
and tribal-caused
and LeftBrain dominant communication-caused
overheating climate change
can also be monoculturally unhelpful
in terms of finding cooperative win/win imagined resolutions.

Robersmith: Some of us are panicking.

The GrandMothers: AnthroSpecies is panicking,
trending toward lose/lose competitive corporate rabidity.

Robersmith: Some are refusing to listen.

The GrandMothers: SWM LeftBrain dominance
continues to violently speak and autonomously act
more than non-violently win/win listen.

Robersmith: “Some are trying to scare everyone into certain behaviors
(whether to reverse or ignore climate change),
and others are just reporting what they think they know.”

The GrandMothers: Some are trying to persuade,
prophecy lose/lose pathology
within everyone
feeding uncertain restraining,
restrictive
retributive justice
and stingy win/lose compromised peace
known as impatient tolerance of further war
violence
divestment away from health
(whether to reverse RightBrain punishing Other
or deny evermore WinElite-LoseNonElite culture not-change),
and others are just reporting
what we think and feel we need safety,
health,
resonant wealth,
resiliently robust compassion.

Robersmith: “With all this debate and reaction,
a problem that is as large as climate change
can cause paralysis,
ineffectiveness,
and despair.”

The GrandMothers: While not listening to what others feel
we cooperatively need,
With all this win/lose political theological debate
rather than win/win economic ecological discernment,
With all this retributive reaction
rather than restorative win/win dialogical communication,
a problem that is as large as climate change
and species mortality
and global extinction of all regenerative energy systems
can cause egocentric paralysis,
competitive win/lose ineffectiveness,
corporate economic despair
about LeftBrain dominant
SWM privileged
violent runaway Win/Lose
Either/Or
Thinking v Feeling
monocultural
monochromatic
monotheistic
monocapitalistic
monoelitist rabidity.

And still inside singsong continues,
a uniting pidgin neurological language
feeling thought integrity:

We belong together
Through all kinds of colonizing corporate weather,
We belong creolizing together.

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Planning for Grace

Last night I arrived very late
for a GRACE planning team meeting.
GRACE’s mission advocates against
all things racist,
whether systemic
or the normal chaos of hate
and sin
against everyday non-violent win-win
choices
policies
procedures
positions
platforms political and economic
sacred and secular
sociological and neurological.

I stepped into discussion of a thesis
that all policies are either racist
or anti-racist.

We were trying out various policies
to see if we could discover which they were.
This reminds me of a popular radio show
outing “HIDDEN RACISM!”

This discernment process
also reminds me of a hiring incident
in our Southern Region
In which a job description
with preference for academic credentials
over indigenous democratic leadership experience
led to hurt feelings of being disrespected
and concerns about systemic white male privilege
within our Unitarian Universalist Association
for egalitarian
and interdependent compassion.

Are budgeting procedures
that begin with authority of last year’s status quo
and are then incrementally nuanced
through recommendations of currently empowered authority figures,
like Treasurers
and CFOs
and Board of Invested,
often age Infested,
Directors,
racist or anti-racist?

Is prejudice just about policies
that must be bilaterally explicated
as healthy or unhealthy for inclusive empowerment,
or is white male privilege also hidden in our procedures,
our therapeutic proposals,
our strategic plans
to do more of the ZeroSum same,
whatever that may competitively be?

What about all our communications,
verbal and non-verbal,
personal and public?

What about all our investments
of time
and money
and positive or negative
or ambivalently uncommitted attitude?

And are all these things
just racist or anti-racist?
Or might they also be
egopatriarchal or ecofeminist,
ageist or multigenerationally inclusive,
nonbinary-phobic or pansexual,
aristocratic or democratic,
communal or capitalistic,
cooperative or competitive,
polycultural or monocultural,
WinWin or LoseLose,
NonZeroSum or ZeroSum,
RightBrain prominent or LeftBrain dominant,
non-violent or violent?

I can hardly wait to read more
about this thesis or antithesis
to find out what I may have missed
all my racist or anti-racist years.

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Critical Reminders

The faith that capitalism
is the only viable democratic economic system
we have experienced,
or could even ecologically imagine,

Reminds me
of the faith that retributive punishment
is the only viable governing political system
we have cooperatively experienced,
or could ever theologically
and resonantly
and compassionately imagine
restoring healthy peace,

Reminds me
of the faith that continuing to do the same competitive things,
make the same win/lose mutually feared assumptions,
will eventually result in some different
and less EarthClimate overheated
and critically pathological outcome,

Reminds me
of Einstein’s faith that repeating this business as usual default
unreasonably defines left v right handed insanity.

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LeftBrain Trauma

My leftbrain deductive reason
now sadly sees 16/20,
since 2016 a patriarchal white privileged hierarchy
of orthodox RightWing religious social history,

Where I am either egomaniacally at the self-righteous top
of my competitive win/lose hierarchical game,
or I am a victim,
bottom-feeder
bleeder prey,
mortally morally wounded,
living in the treacherous and hated boundary
between today’s fading hellish life
and inevitable loss of leftbrain dominant reason
for autonomously existing
merely to survive
for yet another depressing
rainy Monday of meaningless
sold-out
grey capital-monopolistic
Business as either/or
win/lose degeneratively natural
normative
spiritless
deprived
depraved predation
extraction….

Meanwhile
My more both/and co-empathic rightbrain
inducting fluid 20/20 emotions
feels ecofeminist
[not ego-militant]
green, yet full-spectrum,
multicultural warm Earth-lattice of interdependent circles,

Reverse revolving matriarchal
anti-hierarchical encultured
imprinted
co-passioned empowering
non-violently embedded
resonantly wombed
intersectionally organic
transubstantiating left intelligence disempowering
into right wisdom, up inside down,
creolizing
win/win positive healthy communication
of interactive win/win hope,
resiliently enduring faith,
robustly wealthy webs,
not so much either/or walls,
of polypathic
polyphonic
polynomially ZeroZone balancing
binomial
bilateral
bicameral compassion,

Belonging,
safety,
enduring warm significance,
accompaniment,
curious cooperative inquiry
and co-investing trust

Despite leftbrain’s hierarchical non-elite
non straight
non white
non male bottom-bleeder victimization,

RightBrain’s most robust
resonant
and resilient EarthTribe
remembering 20/20 fire circle multicultural singers
and polycultural liturgical dancers,
lyrical speakers
who non-violently listen
with well-balanced co-passioning breath

Bicameral heart-beaters
compassion power,
energy,
healthy democracy of left with right
GoldenRule balancing climates
through positive health co-investment.

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My History of Mystery

We are ecological science
and con-science
and unconsciousness.

We are story
and egological storyteller
and unknown
unheard
unseen.

Earth’s humane act
and actor
and theologically transcendent stasis.

The dance
and dancer
and deaf
and frozen

The song
and singer
and silent
muted
anticipation
and anxiety.

The play
and player
and absent
uninvited
worker.

The thought
and thinker
and feeler
and numb.

The garden
and gardener
and consumer
and starving.

The Earth
and EarthTribe
and Ego
and Interdependent
DNA and RNA place-timed relatives,
matriarchal regenerators
regenerations
degenerations
ungenerated energy
entropy
untropy
anti-morphic
metamorphic
metaphor.

We are leftbrain either/or polynomial
rightbrain polyphonic
ecopolitically polypathic
positive trust energy democracies
health/wealth
ego/ecosystems
bilateral
bicameral
binomial nonzero-sum balancing

The science story,
and consciousness storytellers
and yet unconscious
unfelt
unknown,

The patriarchal history
of and for eco-matriarchal mystery.

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Not That You Depressingly Asked

Not that you asked,
or ever would feel free to inquire,
yet perhaps you grow ready to listen
to a voice inviting exit
from your,
and our,
long loneliness,
self-contempt,
isolation so shelled-over,
so embedded,
you are sure we are each and all
unredeemably alone

In our envy of others,
the positive deviants
with apparently healthy organic
and resonant
and resilient relationships

While we remain powerless to conjure enough curiosity
to discover
and/or rediscover
our own win/win potentialities,
personal
and political,
economic
and ecologically regenerative.

Depression conjures
dark apartness messes
all your own too-competitive fault.

But, your depression,
emotional and/or economic,
political and/or environmental,
like my own,
is no more or less your fault
than is Donald Oompa Trumpa President
of all anti-ecological wisdom,
a new ungreen post-millennial oxymoron,
and Earth’s algorithmic degeneration
into lose/lose fragility,

And privileged human SuperEgo’s declention
disarray
dismay
despair into xenophobic rabidity
oligarchical madness
global depression
mutual suppression
liberally invested in every thing
but love,
curiosity
recovering win/win birth canal memory,
a magical moment of hope for Earth’s warm light
of lifetime win/win recovery.

Your depression is your fault
only in this warm right-brain accompaniment sense
of feeling and knowing we are a fluid,
yet stuck, State
that is our shared win/lose fault
of left-brain dominating culture
parsing compassion stingily,
saving for glorious and
win/win right-brain interdependent
un-lonely Rapturous sacred end.

But, as every community organizer
and integral permaculture designer
and restorative justice advocator
knows from win/win v win/lose v loselose
retributive v restorative justice experience,
we cannot end a resilient health-building project
that will include
any and all multicultural win/win faith
if we did not embody already inside
as we began
pushing through our original organic tunnel
toward Earth love’s first light
and unmuted sounds
of greeting,
warm accompaniment
universal co-present love,

Hope
faith in EarthMother’s warm feeding breast
from whence we each compassion came
come
and go.

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Bored President

I once invested a year
as Board President.
Indeed, I was often a bored resident
of our State Affordable Housing Coalition.

My platform,
to speak grandly
of what was more of a healthy whim,
was for safe and beautiful affordable housing

Habitat is not just an optional frosting
on the State’s health
and wellness
and prosperity cake,

A nurturing confection
to become multiculturally accessible,
co-responsively owned and managed,
and filled with resident ingredients
trained and experienced,
invested and engaged
in supporting each other’s cooperative needs
and hopes
and polycultural faith
in healthy outcomes

Presiding ingredients as essential as 7-grain flour
AND the warm slow-flowing
rich and savory
golden brown honey
of an organic
home-grown
carrot cake.

At the end of my first non-lustrous,
unfrosted year of the healthy carrot,
we were planning our annual conference,
to include our annual meeting,
the election of officers
from a slate nominated by the Board of Directors.

During the Board’s planning meeting,
We first heard from the Executive Director
about the conference theme,
which was to be
“Housing is the Answer”
[to all white male privileged executive financial questions].

Housing is the exclusive answer
to my bigger and better health and well-being cake.

I undiplomatically suggested
perhaps this is a monocultural answer
to a nutritional question
hardly any voters are asking,

Which was, I further supposed,
the reason we have an Affordable Housing Coalition,
to gather our failing corporate wagons
of besieged non-profit housing developers
and their corporate survival lobbyists,
who usually make about three
or four
or even more, times
what their median income residents
take in each year.

I thought, instead,
that affordable,
responsible,
and compassionate housing,
cooperative environments
and structures
and support systems,
are part of the liberating
and secure health care question,
issue,
potential resolution,
integral climate for Earth’s health care,
gardening
and farming,
and feeding,
and repurposing,
and recycling
resident future through past EarthTribe compassion.

Next
we discussed our slate of more mentally healthy officers
for next year.

In the past,
we assumed by hoary precedent
that Presidents
stay president
until their board term expired,
Then we tried to talk some other ambitious,
yet already over-committed, extrovert
to be our unanimously acclaimed
presumably fearless
and nearly flawless
leader,

Second in real world presence and power
only to the Executive Director
and, OK,
maybe third,
after the Financial Director.

Even so,
Board members present and accounted for,
sitting in our wisdom busyness circle,
seemed discouragingly relieved
when I began this agenda item
by announcing that we need to find a new President
because I was clearly not hearing
their politically correct questions
without questions of my own agenda.

I was happy to nominate
a young up and coming Latino leader
from my home town at the time
who was new to the Board.

After the Annual Conference and Meeting,
and his quasi-democratic elevation by affirmation,

Off to the north side
of the chandeliered ballroom,
holding less than sacred space
for mostly Ivy League graduates
without the good sense to dim the lights
and dance to The Beatles together,
maybe sing “Let It Be”
in multicultural harmony,

The new President confided
that he shares my taste
for the health care giving and receiving cake
and the 7-grain housing
and the golden brown honey
of resilient Earth cooperative residents

But, does not feel
it is safe
or liberating
to talk about that
as President resident.

I was his first clue;
probably not his last.

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Changing Thought Systems

It is known throughout Earth’s anonymous
unanimous Commons,
Systems are hard to change.

The more macro-competitive,
Yang-strong,
The more difficult of all conversion stories

Over pernicious decades,
We tend to add “isms”
to pathological ends
of these global systemic issues.

This polyculturalistic/multiculturalism suffix,
negative appendage,
suggests a pejorative problem
of systemistic stuckness,
where once may have lived
a potential for positive
polypathic and polyphonic change
toward Earth’s greener,
more flexible,
Commons.

Ism labels warn of possible toxic contents
including racism,
of course,
and white privileged patriarchalism.

These two appear to be old friends,
as do colonialism
and Catholicism
and globalism
and monotheism,
often hiding diverse and sundry mob-rule
in sinister shapes
of secular poly-tickle-listic hyphenated atheism.

Other systemic cousins
on my networking mind
are liberalism
and capitalism
and communism
and socialism
and fundamentalism
and dualism,
separating spiritual development opportunities
from natural undevelopment risks.

Sometimes, though,
usually when I am not in crisis
but feeling emotionally vulnerable anyway,
I wonder if these impenetrable global
and nationalistic
systemic issues could call out
and in
for healthier cooperative thinking.

Not a direct assault on,
most certainly not a war against,
exterior competing systems,
But a more indirect dialogue
inviting a change in individual
and familial
and indigenous communal thinking
about win/win systems.

This cooperative bilateral thinking
scientists have labeled systemic thinking
and multicultural artists have seen and heard
smelled and tasted
touched and felt
sung and danced
as Earth ecosystemic feeling of interdependent living

Organic
integral journeys toward global meta-systemic utopia,
where naturally perfect systems thinking
syncs with
spiritually pure communion feeling.

For example,
patriarchalism becomes,
in this explicit in-between double-bounded way,
not only a chronic risk to Earth’s survival
but also an immediate everyday opportunity
to imagine aloud,
to touch with voice and hand,
to walk boldly, sometimes baldly, with feet and mind

Into a ZeroCore place
where two or more overpowering competitive Yangisms
might change evolutionary to revolutionary directions,

Directions revolutionary to evolutionary change might
grow toward one or less
matriarchal cooperative ZeroZone
of Yinistic integrity
for rebirthing regenerational
resilient
resonant happiness,
healthier nests,
wealthier eggs,

Synergetic seeds, all about potentiating possibilities
integral-spiritual
bilateral-fractal DNA discernment systems
thinking about what we are more health-cooperatively feeling

Change for wealthier harmonic becoming ecofeminist
less patriarchal,
so more yang-enthusiastically matriarchal.

Within these boundaries of vulnerable dialogue,
what have appeared to be static constipationisms,
mutual opportunistic issues,
also feel unveiled yin-flow nutritionistic
toward cooperatively appositional opportunities
to feel internal spiritual transactions,

Transubstantiations,
transliterations
into natural potentialistic,
not so much transcendently spiritualized isms,

Instead, macro-global systems
of Yang’s golden meta-health network
polypaths traveled,
Polyphonically felt absence
of perennially unfree spiritualisms,
primarily and primally due to a collective change of nutritional thinking
in systems growing healthier.

Cooperatively realistic lives
more powerful than competitive unreal estateisms,
acquired ownership of ismic properties
impregnably fragmented plots
and states of suspiciously marginal boundaries

By left-brain dominant apartheid thoughts
overpowering right-brain co-prominent organic nurture-systems
feeling
touching realistic baptismal waters plenty warm
and not yet boiling over power.

More transystemically webbed
natural spirits
than monoculturally walled

Nature against
co-passioned spirits
with ecological/theological integrity
changing meta-thought systems
felt as holistic networks for well-being.

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Serene Identity

Integrity feeds autonomous Ego-identity
as
Diversity waters interdependent Eco-serenity,

Hope for peace
built through commitment
to economic-ecological Win/Win co-relational green
icons for Public Health
through privately nutritious wealth,
co-operatively invested.

EarthMom mentored me,
inviting me to taste
emerging EgoIdentity
co-acclimating
creolizing metamorphic womb-transubstantiation,
synergetic internal/external communion economics
with public DNA health investments
of multi-generational history
paid nutritiously forward,

My original yang/yin
external/internal shaping womb environment,
wet and warm as an overflowing yin-river
of nutritionally healthy baptism,

I am reborn of a tricky shape-shifter
doctor of ecofeminist creation theology development
ecologically supporting reforesting EarthParadise vocations

For Zero ZenZone interdependent purposes,
truths,
beauty,
passions multiculturally healthy, organic
co-operatively nutritious

Paradise Gardens by work/play day

Recovering polypathic multilaterally cooperative winning eco-politics
between YangLeft-identity
and YinRight-wildly metaphysical 4D polyphonic
bicamerally balancing nutritious WinWin night dreams

Aspirations of healthiest wealth
cooperatively experienced,
loved by Left universal yang,
and worshiped by Right unitarian yin.

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The Bird Feeder

Sometimes,
not often enough,
I stop my morning routine
to watch the feeding drama breathe feathered flurries in and out,
on,
and under,
my side-yard bird feeder

Outside my kitchen windows
over this morning’s sudsy sink,
looking across a twinkling white field
of early March snow,
simply breathing us all in,
boundary framed inside/outside
by my southern neighbor’s brown-stained fence.

I find myself aggressively prejudiced
against the voracious grey squirrel invaders.
NonElite sparrows share my disappointment
with squirrelish selfish ways.

Usually the squirrels scavenge the ground
and snow below my feeder,
my free-will offering
intended to seduce cardinals
and woodpeckers
and finches
and, yes, the humble brown sparrows,
whose ghreat number of heads,
present today and missing tomorrow,
healthy and harmed,
is indeed an epic mystery
offered in return for my pre-invested feeder.

But, one squirrel,
who usually shows up with a friend,
maybe a girlfriend,
I don’t really know
the texture of their ongoing harvesting journey,
reaping through family life,
romance,
play,
foraging for nutritional climax

But, regardless,
This one squirrel likes to challenge
my daily vegetable-oiled
round
brown
metal pole
that holds a clear plastic feeder
enclosed by a squirrel-deterring wire defense,
which acts more like a perch for equi-poised access
than an effective wall
against unwelcome over-consuming rodents.

I am equally at war with crows,
not because I don’t like them as a species,
which, unfortunately, may be my inhospitable issue
about greedy squirrels,
but because crows travel in aggressive gangs.

And, they don’t live here, in my felt ownership sphere,
They hang around this side of the river
but they don’t live in my neighborhood
because they aren’t suitable
for any one properely humane place.
They need a grander sense of cooperative space.

Rowdy crows do, occasionally, flock and swarm in
to clean out my one inadequate consumer-feeder
and produce poop on everything in sight
but I do not tolerate these assaults
in silent Win/Lose acquiescence.

I run out
to shout
against them.

They listen and rise
to move away
but watch and wait to see and hear
if I will continue this lively scarecrow battle.
Which seems to mutually please us
to repeat twice,
or even thrice.

I repeat these roaring toothless threats,
Until we win together,
drawing more appropriately apart.

Then, too,
I notice some of the blue-jays are more tolerant of diversity
while others poke at smaller birds.
This bothers me.
If some can get along,
why not Win/Win all?

Still,
I seldom intervent.
We have only two blue-jay couples,
so I put out plenty for all
If we are patient enough
to work and play and breathe around each other.

The mourningdoves always salvage off the ground,
winter through summer
They look fat
and dark suit preacherly
as they waddle
and forage what their more flamboyantly aviary cousins
leave for them
underneath my humble feeder.

So little consumer invested
for so much dramatically productive grace,
mutually feeding place.

Yet, I still wonder
why I am so incensed
about the scandalous squirrel
who defies my obviously over-powering will
to not feed him here,
or anywhere
in my garden
or on my struggling fruit and nut trees.

I suppose rodents remind me
too much
of my me-feeder consumptive shamelessness.

 

 

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