Brown satin
and warm latin passions
unveil to reveal
a powerful white black tool
Polyculturally vulnerable
enlightening school
Multiculturally transparent
empowering rule
For reforming privileged sensory
thoughts
And reverse-flowing predative sensual
feelings.
It’s weird
and sometimes wild
living with a non-LeftBrain verbal dominant
aspiring child,
now young adult
I find myself waiting for him
to nonverbally connect
and correct me
about my patriarchal domineering
economic and political ableist sins
of RightBrain felt omission
from commercial value
and, perhaps worse,
my passionately sacred co-messianic
self-responsible
unconditional co-enabling
sins of RightBrain depressive
trauma approach/avoid
ambivalent
obsessive/compulsive
commission
and reiterative recommission.
And
he never disappoints
going to the right
felt point
Could no more lie
or steal
than feel envy
fueling greed
for tomorrow’s self-sufficient hopes
and egocentric dreams
At night
when we sleep,
if not before
then after an overpowering seizure
He can explain to me
No ancient spiritual 1 experience
could be other than HereNow natural 0 feeling
linear and yet circular
regeneratively enspiraling
Without LeftBrain dominant
defensive weapons
1 protagonist neither can
nor would
nor should
retool and lavishly display 0 word voices
outside inadequately disabled numeric language
for nonverbal co-passion’s inside images
Sensory receptive memories,
cause-effect singular explanations
and co-arising circular narratives
of co-redemptive recycling
spiraling vicious
and virtuous
negative 1 bipolarity
and not-not positive non-0 dipolarity
co-arising appositional circles
Not divorcing physical Nature
outside abled bodies
from not just metaphysical
Spirit inside minds
Deep listening back through neurosystemic compassion
wet and warm
and dispassion
darkly parched and cold
bilateral multicultural
multigenerational
poly-paradigmatic
panentheistic
enthymematic health and safe feelings
making and remaking
neurosystemic distinctions
Integrity’s RightOriginal Mind
passion for outside health
and safe internal wealth
co-regeneration
Win/Win default
poly-passioned balance
bilateral
Ego Yang Verbal Left
stern deep-voiced patriarchal
sacred co-passioning
Eco Yintegral NonVerbal Right
pre-bicameral Taoist humming
indigenously outflowing
growing wise CoPassion
For positive-health EarthMother
warm comforting wet wombs
sacred surrounding
positive-wealth AnthroChild
co-operatively panentheistic
wild
belly laughing co-empathic passion
Internally sung and danced
oral wu-wei wisdom traditions
of body/mind
nature/spirit
out/inside formation
flowing co-relational balance
synergetic harmony
symphony
resonant integrity
Grows wiser pre-verbal
cooperatively positive health
than multigenerational
disabling apartheid nightmares
of polypathic abuse
and monoculturing neglect
Anticipating inside/outside mortal
-1/-0 lose/lose
universal cold
and feverishly hot tremors
predicting dark disuniting trauma.
It feels weird post-peak,
and sometimes wild,
continuing to sacredly aspire
to merit this gift
RightMind panentheistic survival
of LeftBrain talking
ego-monotheistic thriving
exclusive AnthroSpeaking salvation stories
Living
and apparently dying
repeatedly
with a non-LeftBrain verbal prominent
aspiring child,
now contentedly sleeping
in compassionate comfort
and organically warm
sacred joy
Hopefully
dreaming that we feel pleasantly weird,
sometimes provoking wild belly laughs,
feeling free outside a LeftBrain verbal dominant
label,
name,
+1 inside v -0 outside frame
EitherSacred Or SecularizedDisEnfranchisedOther
possibly unhealthy and unsafe
win/lose competitive imbalance
Preferring
RightMind prominent
warm and wet wombed compassion
emerging -(-0) inside/outside +1
equitable development dreamwork
emergent compassion conversations
Weird
and sometimes wild
living within a non-LeftBrain verbal
monoculturally dominant
Instead,
a more Here/Now
timelessly balancing
copassioning moment
of in/out-digenous
resiliently peaceful wisdom
To choose soulmates
health wealthy
and wisely
As they choose
to dream with you.
A problem with breath-focused sitting
eyes hooded
closed down sensory receptor meditation,
in my peak omnipotent mindful experience
This inside passive form of seeking resilience
presumes we consistently care
about furthering our
health care vocations,
organically sacred to some,
merely biological to more chronically traumatized
emotionally challenged
by histories
of neglect
and/or multigenerational mysteries
of emotional/verbal
physical/nonverbal abuse
disregard
bullying
The opposite of nonviolent communication
to restore egojustice
and repair trauma damage
to panentheistic
yintegral ecopeace
Which is the opposite
of monotheistic
yang-supremacist ecocide
As enlightened resonance
of Sun Worship
is to dark dissonance
against Earth empowering
resilient Win/Win
health care meditation systems,
physically active
and metaphysically robust movement,
music,
mindful,
therapeutic empowering
co-passionate peak neurosensory
resilient inside/outside
meditation systems
for enlightening
co-empowering
exhausting, but not manic,
exhilarating, but sustainable
intense, but not anxious
anticipations of time-sufficient
left/right bicameral
thought/felt resiliently sacred
restorative justice
Organic co-passioning
timeless warm round
expansive light empowering
all forming and flowing
inter-religious interconnections
in-between natural/spiritual regenerations
of co-operative
co-governing
co-mediating
co-invested ecopolitical
robust and resilient
EarthTribe peace.
My most important priority
for personal inside health care
is polycultural outside
EarthCare
Environmentally cooperative
divine health caring enlightenment
empowering humane safe
sufficient wealth care.
I was bruised by dogmatically non-evangelical
Christ monotheistic Jehovah judgmental bad faith
of divine powers
equally entitled
to generously create love
and selfishly act out of jealousy
divine punishment for unfaithful sins
of worship omission
and secularizing commission
Prescribed by the inspired
and kleptocratically negotiated
Greek
and Latin
and English transubstantiations
of AnthroSupremacist visions
speaking
and singing
and dancing
in white male dominant translations
Royal capital is holy
next to divine monopolistic inspiration
of presumably omniscient sacred values
captured by scribes
and conserved by councils
of presumably straight white orthodox
literate males
representing ecclesial royalty
Featuring Jewish Saul
turned Christ Active Revivalist Paul
writing self-governance purification letters
suggesting that ecclesial rituals
of a polytheistic sensual nature
are the opposite
of our most monotheistic spiritual
yet HolySpirit EarthMatriarchal mindful
sacred panentheistic experiences.
I am also more metaphysically resonant
as a YangNatural/YinSpiritual co-passion Taoist
believing through deep listening
to my (and possibly our)
deepest restorative regenerous justice
Yang/Yin co-operative communication intentions
throughout male/female co-investing reproductive
cause-effect linear days
and co-empathic
regeneratively resilient
lunar recircling nights
CoPassioning
yintegral humane sexuality
as our deepest,
highest
and best sacred sensory practice
positive synergy practice
health wealthing practice
till we get ourselves
Yang in and Yintegral out
depolarizing balance
resiliently Left/Right
co-empathic
resonant dialogical praxis
Bodhisattva
co-messianic
co-passionate Left/Right
internal/external communionation
practice
verbally positive thoughts
and metaphysical theories
about nonverbal healthy felt
nonviolent physical feelings.
Diversity explores
both resonant and opposing positions
with nearly predative anticipation
And such perversely curious
reverse revisioning diversity deplores
with monoculturing anxiety
quietly crossed
and boldly violated boundaries
of personal
and familial
and municipal
and EarthTribal
indigenous integrity
Sacred space expands mindfully perceived
unless this Business As Traumatically Usual place
is too lose/lose dark
and I am too win/win blind
to keep faith with dimming starlight
Celestial Glitter Rivered Ways
majestic
yet ominously silent Spirits
of ancient silvered sentient bright
Yet momentary mortal time
feels reflective light received
sufficiently reassuring
mythically alluring
for transient transportive pleasure
and tenderly insufficient
for full-colored organic measure
of integrity’s potential Paradise.
I can accept that love
I have time to learn
and earn
But
can I embrace compassion
I feel sure appreciates me
far more wisely
than I have earned?
Positive passions more pleasant
than I could ever find sufficient time
to brilliantly learn
My adoration spot
on this comedy central
AnalRetentive Stage
listing
lusting
more Left Winged
liberating
than Right Singed
defensively sedating.
I am haunted
by an oppressively disabling gap
between what I have sufficient healthy time
to accomplish
to communicate
to experientially articulate
as anemically contrasted
to all I can imagine health
and safe wealth doing
togathering in this day,
this week,
this month,
this year,
this final decade
of my personal AnthroGay Pride
and WhitePrivilege
to prefer Black Lives MultiEnculturing Matter
and wild Paradise
PolyCulturing Pleasure
Win/Win bi-everything trans-thriving
positively contagious
as the clap
On a loved ones back
is my gay worldview sound
of one left hand liberally clapping
out FreeDom
ReStorative Justice
Love
Between my NonViolently WinWin Communicating
brothers and sisters
LeftBrain verbally dominant
claiming Peace
I nonverbally feel
RightBrain left outside
closeted gay emotional neglect
In my polyculturally wise universe
feeling all EarthMother’s love,
Polyester is always Lose/Lose trauma
bad news drama
while
PolyPathic Win/Win
evokes sacred warm
wet 1 within 0 zen rivers
of deeply penetrating gospel
Good regenerative humor
despite toxic rumors
that my indigenous EarthTribe
intentional family
and trauma-infested community
are suffering from an overheated climate
of monoculturing dementia
Increasingly difficult to recall
the love we have had time to learn
is earned one timeless
warm remembering moment
always liberally Here
as time conserving Now,
unconditionally warm
well-moisturized regard
For healthy hygiene
is next to wealthy
goddessness
A gay gratitude gift
more than sufficiently
out proud
well endowed.
What could I do?
What to do
when your biological,
and even formerly sober ecological,
relationships suddenly veer insanely romantic?
Or worse,
mistrustful
and yet
not always distrustful,
or not,
maybe deeper sadness
and occasional manic gladness
emerging inclusively wider questions
of approach and/or avoid
Both romantic
and yet soberly pedantic
sometimes before,
to plan, for after
feeling up
and/or sore
predicts anxiously down,
as genocide
predicts ecocide,
as biological attraction
follows ecological co-invested transaction
secular lust
must be felt sacred just
to know need for win/win romance
from greed for a winner take all
anthroprivileged chance
to flex power
without sharing light,
capital wealth
without nutritional health,
disvalues of Yang infestment
without Yintegral co-investment values
predation
without co-operative elation
My rabid rabbit hole
suddenly re-opening inter-religiously
grasping indigenously divine romantic
mystery
or sacred nomadic history
not told
or remembered
When mother trees
and father limbs
felt sexy
and bark,
like skin,
felt consensual,
ecologically curious
and biologically courageous
Mystically nondualistic
Yanged up healthy
and yet also,
more kinda ecofeminist
Yintegral safe sex
yet curiously pantheistic MotherEarth
[is, and is not my sacred EarthMother]
outrageously romantic wombing
What to do when
win/win romantic co-investments
don’t go green cooperative ecstatic
resiliently resonating peak experience?
Instead, may feel not just egotistic
but also HumanPredative
pedantic privilege
more than ecologically resilient
and/or romantically brilliant,
depending, I suppose,
on which side of the secular courage
v sacred curiosity
I may feel,
and need,
and want this day
Worshipping manly mountains
and crouching in warm breezed grassy valleys
multiculturally enlightening
and polyculturally empowering
New ego/eco-logical systemic questions
about what to do
when One dominating monotheistic
StraightWhiteMale
dogmatically scripted
incorporated
religion in Power
And yet
disproportionately GrandMother funded
and nurtured
and fed
while marginalized,
still feeling disenfranchised
and stuck
On what to do
when your biological
and even formerly ecological
sacred relationships
suddenly veer insanely win/win romantic
I suppose it has something to do with
avoiding your personal slam-bam purposes
to feed and breed
our EarthRevival slow-grown
inspiraling cooperative
deep sacred meaning
is also highest and best mindbody use,
not abuse
Tipping WuWei toward
P = N(NP)
equitable chance
of ego/eco-systemic
win/win resilient
bio/eco-logical resonant
brilliance,
as LeftBrain Either/Or
Light v Dark
is to RightBrain Both/And
+1/-(-0)= PolyMathic EcoPolitical Equity
Expressed in
polyvagal neuro-systemic communication
polypathic eco-systemic not not mental health systemic
natural/spiritual
thought/felt trauma prevention
internal/external resonant affection
resiliently romantic
good health humored
co-inspiring balance issues
Which keep obsessively
and compulsively,
defensively
and liberally
avoiding
and approaching
fleeing courage
and fighting/freezing curiosity
looping back
to what should I do
when my biological health
fights my former ecological wealth
of co-empathic communication systems,
suddenly and insanely veering
pan-sensory win/win romantic?
Seems a whole lot more
than merely not so win/lose traumatic.
Dark chances,
unhealthy and unsafe trauma
HiStories
Degenerating predative dogmas
not wanting to let go of ballistics
even for dawning light’s sacred promise
to grab full-immersion hold
and heal dark mythologies
lose now and again later ecologies
repeat rehearsed
inside-only voiced
dark passion narratives
Speaking out alarmed Betrayal
from those you were taught to Trust–
[it was Her job!
I have an unconditional contract
on a warm wet naturally wombed
and spiritually unwounded
birthright!
Defying Other’s Anger
about my gift-economy Hypocrisy
about my sacred Golden Rule restriction
win/win positive aspiration,
invoked by nature’s spiritual
Hippocratic Oath
to at least do no damage
losing trusted breath in
so losing full breath back out
again
and again
and repeat breathlessly again.
My own most difficult,
occasionally traumatic,
distressingly long, slow
letting go transition
Feels almost inevitably headed
for natural health-Lose
spiritual health-Lose
despair
Unless we all keep trying our best,
not just me
cleaning up your mess
to suffering servant impress
All us AnthroPrivileged victims
aware of traumatic over-populated
rabid traumatic
and pandemic health risks,
and runaway
emerging PTSD
and dementia
and suicide
and matricide
and ecocide
Make it almost impossible
to respect ourselves
yet not fear
retributive justice officers
and judges
and monolithic Yang-Jehovah
Dispensing punishments and fines
and shame
and blame
where the only obvious victim
I can see
is me.
My dark protagonist continues
to be victimized,
even now in aging memories
Every day past light
leads, at dusk,
to dark future
leads, at dawn,
to soon past light…
Yet my attachment to enlightenment
encourages me to disregard
co-arising dipolar dark empowerments
bicamerally re-associated
Yet awkwardly, sometimes
with high-risk trauma histories
monoculturally LeftBrain
EgoCentric predative Yang
AnthroPrivileged Voices
stuck on healthy and safe past orthodox
value systems
personal
and economic
and political
and separate and unequal
bi-sensory
and anti-sexual competitive dogmatic traditions
Not spiritually or naturally learning
so not wanting to let go
even for dawning light’s healthy promise
to grab resilient hold
and heal dark
post-traumatic lose/lose
zero-sum global
ecocidal winterish nightmares
Dipolar co-arising
unconditional warm sun rising
well-moisturized
copassionately co-invested day dreams
and horizontal dances,
core-chakra interpersonal win/win
exercises
nonviolent practice
practice
practice
Until we get our cooperative peak experience
sacredly awesome
and restorative ecojustice
left and right again
BiLateral
BiCameral creolization
in timeless tides
of over-swelling
regenerativity
Not quite
so bleakly alone
trapped in silent screaming stark
Dark.
My dubiously protagonist Self
outgrows toward a co-invested
cooperative
co-governing center
A core UnWhite House communication center
Tao training for sacred positive
and trauma negation memories
Into ecologically
and economically
Right whole open
PanenTheistic Intelligence
Amping up
co-relational win/win choices
through unconditional regard
of panentheistic
inside/outside co-discernment
voiced choices
Ego secularized
by LeftHemisphere
health and safety cooperative
evolving old tired competitive
revolutionary predative theories
Not mentioning
survive together to thrive
communal co-empathic
win/win imaginations
empowering enlightened co-governance
animating histories
My intimately win/win highest and best
co-redemption narratives
feel like a sacred housed cooperative
trauma-free awareness
and copassionate intent
to live together EarthTribe curiously,
yet confidently,
win/win committed
sacredly together
On, but not overpowering,
my cusp of traumatic anxiety triggers
and co-therapeutic anticipated compassions
together deepending mutually co-invested
ownership and co-therapeutic
natural health and spiritual safety
intent
Calls my sacred housing cooperative images
merging projects for
and from
cooperative nondogmatic experiences
comforted by food and energy
nurturing resilience
Appreciating river-front environmental green
and clean
co-relational preservation
not at all bully mean
Historical-multicultural
Right-sacred/Left-secularizing
co-discernment spirit-mind/nature-body skills
of cooperative
co-governing communications
For green cooperative resilience
reproducing inside imaged
EarthPeace therapeutic homes
and panentheistic gardens
in/out-sided
wellness-rounded
competing mortal space
throughout immortal time
for EarthTribe’s Here/Now resonance.
gdill52 