Man with bandaged arms sitting on chair next to an old TV with cracked screen showing silhouettes
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Deviating Sisters

One of my sisters believes I chose to be queer.

Did you remind her
you had no more choice about chasing guys
than she did?

Yes.
But her favorite televangelist
says I must be mistaken,
or just lying,
because who wouldn’t choose to be hated
by all the hetero homophobes
like televangelists,
and evangelical radio heads,
right?

That makes no sense.
She can’t really believe
you would choose to belong
to any repressed and humiliated minority,
especially during early onset of puberty,
when every girl and boy in any culture
is terrified of becoming different,
or special,
or weeded out of the clickety-clak pack.

Well, as she sees it,
she is in a LoseLose double-bind.
Either I chose to be queer, and am thereby demented,
or God graces all forms of WinWin sexual expression,
which would be contrary to her homophobic enculturation,
so it is easier to believe I am nuts
to choose perversely
than to consider herself nuts
not to choose more graciously,
especially with regard to God’s creative capacity for love,
rather than simplistic judgments
which look and smell and sound like patriarchal sexism
more than radical compassion of God’s healthy pleasure
of regenerative love among all gendered children,
red and yellow,
black and white,
gay and straight
and shades of grey transgendered,
each is precious in our polyamorous
Gaian Hypothesis sight.

What about your other sister?

Oh, she agrees.

With what, or whom?

She agrees we’re all nuts.
Nuts
not to choose healthy love
over pathological hate
and fear
and anger
and greed,
craving to keep all the hot men
for one’s own privileged clan.

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The Only Way To Go

When I was a new seminarian
I had a favorite parish priest mentor
who told me the best way to die
is while having an orgasm.

I wasn’t sure if I could ask
why he was so exclamatory sure
of his nakedly compromising position.
I did not really know him all that well,
although he seemed to be a swell up kind of Father.

Perhaps I looked a bit nervous
because he hastened to reassure me
the reason he is enamored of orgasms,
of peak experiences,
is because they transcend our cognitive dualities
in-between polyamorous Eros
and polytheistic Agape.

Orgasms are ecstatic climatic events,
warm full-bodied memories
of mindbody interdependence,
of holistic cooperative economic enlightenment
and political empowerment within
every organ and cell,
muscle and happy little ego-subsystem
groaning out this profoundly universal Yes!
with both LeftBrain audio-visual ethos compassion
and RightBrain universally uniting
neurosensory climate of eros pleasure.

I didn’t know what to say to this bicameral-sexual therapy.
But, if this is an option for how to die,
it does sound like the only ecstatic one I have ever heard.

So I said that.
And then my mentor suggested I go home
and practice
living that same way.

Interesting,
how orgasms struggle through rhapsodic space
while dying struggles against too-fast insufficient time.

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Silhouette of a person dissolving into particles between dry cracked ground and a colorful flower-filled meadow at sunset
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Said the Wiccan to the Wicked

Cognitive decline
follows chronic emotional neglect

Said the curious student
to teachers of dogma

Said the silenced sage
to muted musicians

Said the theologian
to exhausted bodhisattvas

Said the frustrated ecologist
to traumatized wiccan worshippers

Said the gospel sympathizer
to Old Testament victimizers

Said the scientific systems reformer
to irreligious deformers

Crown chakra abuse
follows root chakra neglect
because
Root chakra abuse
follows crown chakra neglect

Because my cognitive ethos decline
follows our chronically traumatized
eros neglect

As my disillusion
follows Earth’s disempowerment

Re-cognizing humane ethotic decline
follows chronic divine erotic neglect

Not empowering transformation
not enlightening compassion’s
authentically engaging information

Scientifically sagacious incline
following inter-religiously amusing
passions.

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Uncategorized

A Feel For History’s Mystery

Are people who sense a direction in history,
before anthropological history,
on back through prehistory,
who feel their way

Glide through wet organic transmission
transitioning
transformations

Licentiously polypathic mystics?
not quite conservative enough
to color only within orthodox boundaries
of a more resiliently nurtured
polyculturally natured Tradition.

Are those who feel,
without knowing,
only humane history progresses
wombanists of nurture?
and patriarchs penetrating EarthMother’s nature?

Either enlightened way
empowering both,
not rationally speaking deductive science
and reductive mathematics

Not multisensory objective
about this objective
they sense beyond anthropology’s history
within larger gooey stages
of living Earth’s exotic
erotic history?

If polypaths of buzz and boom
become harbingers of doom,
then we dismiss them
too darkly pessimistic,
not objective prophets.

As multicultural cooperativists,
transitional syncretists,
transformative integrationists,
become neuropsychologists
of positively peaceful nature,
then we dismiss these as too optimistic,
not rationally realistic.

Perhaps cobinary transgenderals sense in-between
organic nature’s sacred nurture
erotically animated polypaths

More creolizing forest green
and sky blue
lavishly democratic

To include rippling river systems
and mutually needy molecules
miniscules
mini-schools

Water swimming
air breezing
soil teasing
fire hot breathing

Deranged need to consummate
FatherSun’s enlightening
EarthMother’s empowering
cobinary democratic equivalence

Exploding double-binds
I should not become that,
because I am this,
nor could I want only this,
when I have already warmly felt that.
I should not become…

All of which is true
and false
depending on whether one
is half of erotic two
or merely opposed
to none

An agapic positivist
or a traumatized negativist,
and/or polyphonically coloring
in-between blue and red
in mind and out
of bodied bed

All above bored
should one entertain
a regenerative Win/Win nondualist
rejecting Lose/Lose
bad smell and taste positions

Not landing where we midway greet
our Alpha progressing
LeftMind thoughts
living within
our Omega conserving
RightBody feelings

Much more prehistorically profound
unbound pre-cognitions
such as

If sacred, then not secular, and vice versa.
If divine mystery, then not merely humane history, and vice versa.
If inductively felt, then not deductively thought, and vice versa.
If mythos, then not logos, and vice versa.
If erotic passion, then not agapic peace, and vice versa.
If interdependently unitarian binomial, then not independently universal nomial,
and vice versa.

Yet midway between lie peak coital cobinaries
lusting between each Yang
loving counter-point cosine Yin,
as fertile light harbors desolate darkness
and warm feelings require cold memories.

To paraphrase physicist Steven Weinberg,
The more the universe seems integratively comprehensible,
conscious-able,
the more it also seems double-binding and edged
by nonzero-souls
fluidly aware of primal cobinary relationship.

While Tao’s panentheism dies devoid of historic purpose,
Yin (0) empty of unliberated boundaries,
with Yang (1) interdependent FullColor Octaves
unfolding and reweaving all resonantly felt integrity

Monotheism’s anti-eroticism
remains stuck in dualistic Yang v Yin double-binds

These two together Yin/Yang
appositionally co-arising mystery’s double-pointedness
becoming Yang strong octave light
eternally being Yin flowing
octave resonant power waves.
.
How could anyone who does not savor
history’s healthy democratizing erection
objectively rediscover
progressing freedom away from Yang v Yin
oppositional games
not conserving freedom to become Yin/Yang
appositional co-discovering
whom we most need and want
within our co-empathic trust
of each potentially integrative Other?

People who sense a healthy direction
in democratizing cobinary history,
much older
and indigenously wiser
than anthropocentric history

On back through agapic/erotic
crown/root
mountain/valley
light/power
sage/muse
FatherSun/EarthMother prehistory.

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Uncategorized

Harmony of Right and Left Brain: Cooperative Wisdom

A happy healthy and wealth-integrated
indigenously pleasing/displeasing RightBrain
grows maturely peaceful as a calm winter night,
content to allow LeftBrain to ego-chatter away
debating further cooperative win/win plans
for Earth’s and Elder RootBrain’s and,
most immediately and satisfyingly therapeutic,
newer CrownBrain’s best beloved belonging day.

In an evolutionary historical sense,
we are each and all,
WesternDominant and EasternRecessive bicameral
moving NorthernMind and SouthernBody bi-hemispheres,
RightBrain embedded in EarthMother’s yin-flowing
regenerative yang-stengthening
emergently extending love’s warm universal womb

Before enlightening exposure
to Either/Or deductive springs
of AnthroPrivileged
bilateral Both/And cobinary intelligence

Bringing newborn eumemic trust
in One GodSun’s ethotic crowning truth
experienced through GaiaEarth’s erotic rooted beauty

Passion and Pleasure
reborn light of FatherSun’s democratically radiant trust
in what is MidWay warm
co-empowering Earth’s green caste
not too zealously condemning red hot
and not too silently victimized blue cold.

This integratively cooperative and nurturing economy
of RightBrain’s root erotic chakra,
listens to deep ecologically learn, regenerate, remember
LeftBrain’s ethotic crown co-investment chakra,
with both wise yang opportunities
and overly reductive dis-yintegrative risks.

Yintegral Wisdom
RightBrain deep flowing
Yang’s polypathic bicameral imagination
toward spacious/timeless capital-invested
1(0)-cobinary belonging,
void of any cognitive v affective
ethotic v erotic
crown v root
remaining upper v lower caste dissonance

Resistance to Yang/Yin cooperative ecopolitical contentment
within this silence
of a warm winter night’s co-redemptive womb,
becoming evolution’s further revolution
of not said not silent
ethos/eros co-empathic
passion/pleasure bliss

Multiculturing hope
in bicamerally co-arising nonduality
of ecological empowerment
through winter’s contenting hibernation

Calm before more fractured convergence storms
of 20/20 perception/reception co-passionate laughter,
remembering how unSage LeftBrain has been
to not see RightBrain’s muzzled Muse health
in AnthroPrivileged co-empathic song and dance
cooperatively mediated
cobinary SunFather/EarthMother
crown enlightened ethos-telling
root empowering
eros-swelling wealth.

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Hold Me

Hold me.

Hold me one last time
within your strong brown arms
and red-blooded heart.

Hold me to your chest
so fierce with lovely loyalty,
warm inclusion
not yet chilled by my exclusion.

Hold me this one last time
remembering all our years
and glad times before

Shading from memory
aching days and nights alone
without passion’s touch
on skin
in heart
beneath belonging mind
longing to live more fully in this body
worthy of graced embrace.

Wrap your arms
and legs around me,
your breath
and sweat secure me.

Hold me one last time
before I go
where we cannot again
feel ourselves together
warm skin to warm
too thin.

Hold me for our love
and not our loss.

Hold me this one last time
forever.

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Uncategorized

Valentine’s Day Resilience

Gratitude
for grace already received
is a robust measure of generosity.

Compassion scans for generosity’s fullness
felt within
as incarnated without

As dispassion predicts greed’s anxious emptiness.

Giving is physical and/or verbal
while generosity is mental and nonverbal.

Giving,
like loving,
hoping for a return of grace
within your lifetime’s future,
does not share
or stretch
your gift of generosity.

Giving,
hoping to receive in equal measure,
plus interest,
plus loyalty,
plus admiration for our generosity,
is an investment
which counts the cost
of risking loss

Not necessarily a failure of gratitude,
or love,
for oneself
as for Other,
and also
not an outward compassionate act
of inward
mind-nourishing generosity.

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Love Begets Resilience

Back in our preverbal day
of healthy regenerating time,
indigenous wisdom
pursued peak experiences
of cooperative pleasure,
deep co-empathic embrace.

Sometimes,
especially when this pleasure was sustained,
euphoric,
ejaculatory
and reverberating in cycles
of deep wombed ecstasy,
procreation happened,
preferably in the spring
when new life is more likely to thrive
with bountiful rain
and lusty bullfrog refrains.

Not until later did monotheistic minds
decontextualize procreative purposes
from pro-ecstatic deep dark intimate meanings

Co-gravitations
dipolar co-arisings
coupling erotic organisms
regenerating co-passionate feelings
evolving love’s healthy ecological intent
to regenerate outward together
before degenerating inward apart.

Love is a pleasant feeling,
and a healthy wealth principle
of recreative compassion,
enlivenment.

A principle of ecological integrity
describes,
without dismembered dogmatic prescriptions,
these regenerative healthy ways
truths
trusts
in which living communions
thrive on this sacred planet

Interdependent networks
of cells
organisms
bioregions
ecosystems
EarthTribal species,
multigenerational families

Find our co-identities
while also compelling MeWe
individual/cultural
health/wealthy relationships
win/win egocentric within
AND with ecohabitat Others

Loving integrity reigns
within humanity’s historical context
of compassionate win/win integral
multicultural
polycultural systems surrounding Earth,
spring raining down upon Earth birth,
breezing across and warmly through,
sunlighting our days
and star studding shared nights.

Finding balance between one’s ego,
our individual cooperative win/win narratives,
and those of compassionate Others
represents EarthTribe’s win/lose wounded heart
of passion
love
unconditioned warm
and wet mesmerized regard
for mutual pleasure
pressure
passion
pulling and pushing
precognitive integrity.

In my curious stories
of win/win love,
when my deepest darkly hidden desire
includes my Other partner
enjoying our neuro-sensory
greatest
healthiest
robust
playful happiness,
some resonant relationship
more contextually co-empathic
profoundly unitarian
and multiculturally universal
than a personal procreative intention
happily emerges.

Right to Left bicameral climaxes
are not so much for a creative future purpose
as swimming in multisensory recreative meaning
here
for passion now,
embodied
for compassioning minds,
neurosystemic wholesome space
for EarthTribal regenerating
eternally connected
timeless time

In storming
maelstrom moments,
new expanding love stories
become

Fundamental flowing nature/spirit
body/mind narratives
re-membering how we have become
healthy alive,
enlivened,
undeadened.

This multisensory neuro-system
of regenerating contagious achievement
in cooperative win/win
ego-health/eco-wealth global networks
is where re-ligioning
re-connecting
re-membering
re-weaving
re-lusting
re-creating freedom
of compassionate verbal
and nonverbal communicating egos
hope to become co-invested curiosity

Resiliently harmonizing
biosystemically resonating
within Earth’s whole open
win/lose risk-avoidant
cooperative beauty/pleasure seeking
eco/theo-logical
embodied left
and sacred right
bilaterally resilient mind.

Note: This piece is in appreciative dialogue with Andreas Weber’s Matter & Desire: An Erotic Ecology, especially the first paragraph on p. 9.

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Uncategorized

The Best Way To Go

When I was a new seminarian
I had a favorite parish priest mentor
who told me the best way to die
is while having an orgasm.

I wasn’t sure if I could ask
why he was so exclamatory sure
of his nakedly compromising position.
I did not really know him all that well,
although he seemed to be a swell up kind of Father.

Perhaps I looked a bit nervous
because he hastened to reassure me
the reason he is enamored of orgasms,
of diastatic experience,
is because they transcend our language boundaries
between Eros and Agape.

Orgasms are ecstatic climatic events,
warm full-bodied memories
of mindbody interdependence,
of holistic cooperative ecopolitics within
every organ and cell,
muscle and happy little ego-subsystem
groaning out this profoundly universal Yes!
with both LeftBrain audio-visual Eros
and RightBrain universally interdependent
neural-sensory climate of Agape.

I didn’t know what to say to this bicameral-sexual therapy.
But, if this is an option for how to die,
it does sound like the only good one I have ever heard.

So I said that.
And then my mentor suggested I go home
and practice
living that same way.

Note: To Fr. Gary Kennedy, who is not on the Catholic Church’s Great Wall of Shame, yet also not on the Church’s Great Wall of Patriarchal Wisdom, where he might more ecstatically reside. With warm gratitude.

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Uncategorized

Polypathic Paradigms

The more I read of systematic science and theology
the less logic I find in their continuing distinctions,
their supposed mutual immunity,
their difference without a difference.

They neither have multiculturally defined nor disagreed about point of Origin,
nor evolving destination toward Omega,
nor whether those two might be the same or different
in some temporal way,
nor have we refined nor resolved all evolutionary creation stories in-between.

For me, their respective richness
is found where they most agree.
What science sees as Earth and Heaven’s natures,
religion transcends as Spirit of Intelligent Health.

What Earth reveals as ecologic of natural systems,
the Heavens unveil as ecopolitical multicultural harmonics of con-science.
Religion calls to worship
what polypathic scientists love to adore,
mysteries of dipolar co-arising revolutions,
comprehending new economies of relationship
as never seen to love before.

Eros/Animus/Yang powers co-gravitational evolution
as Agape/Anima/Yin co-arises elational revolution.
DualDark Eros,
secret passions for blissful notnot union with sustained integrity,
Janus face of ecopolitically positive pronomials,
Agapic Resolutions singing resonant anthems of primal reunions,
dancing multicultural rainbows
waving rings and strings of love’s ecological plasmatic climate streams,
co-choreographing evolutions,
conjoining private pilgrimages within larger transpeciating regeneration stories.

Anthrocentric bodies govern erotic/psychotic chemistries
as EarthCentric mind/memories govern agapic/nihilistic,
health/pathology autonomic instincts of DNA/RNA fractal-holonic scriptures,
evolving cooperative/competitively dissonant regenetic languaged consciousness
of scientific-heuristic distinctions between now and next,
with and without experiential difference
tipping/notnot-tipping scales of love v mutual immunity.

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