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Pride and Mystic Wonder

I told the nun in charge
of Religious Education
If asked about sexual orientation
I will say
I’m gay.

I want to teach
deep listening learning
not how not to lie.

She wonders why
such forthrightness
feels so important
Are you a recruiter
for gay pride?
Are you a political activist?

Gay pride
makes as much sense to me
as straight pride,
as if our sexual orientations
were something chosen,
accomplished through heroic effort,
like mental health
in a too LeftYang Patriarchal culture
forgetting Left with Right bilateral mindbodies
are sacred gifts
of karmic grace,
to live here with now
in this cosmically interdependent time
as place.

Yet,
while gay or straight pride,
maybe even transgender supremacy,
feel competitively bullying inappropriate,
given these are gifts
not originating from our own accomplishment,
so too
shame and denial
of whichever of these diverse non-predative
victimless
sexually co-passionate orientations
greeted our FirstDay incarnation,
call it PositivEnergy karma
and call it ego-ecosystemic grace,
I see no point in shame,
nor even blaming a corrupt moral environment
for who and where and why
I am meant to sensory-spiritually become.

To lie
would be to teach shame
for karmic grace as we deep learning listening are,
and have been
co-passionately non-violent
born.

My veiled
and roundly black habited nun
observes
Sometimes what and how
and who and why we learn to ego-ecologically love
lies between orthodox happiness
and heterodox despair.

Rabbi Abraham Heschel
taught sacred Love
as Wonder and Awe experience

Joy and Ecstasy
their persuasive climax destination

Toward a mystic flash
of Teilhard’s brilliant CoOperative Omega Pointed Bridge
for reborn synergetic baptism,
but this has not been my path
or hoped for destination,
certainly not warm regarding sexual co-passions
as cause for voluptuous public celebrations
and pride of wonder and awe
I have of myself alone,
or not,
accomplished.

Perhaps
for Teacher Abraham
Wonder and Awe
and sacred Love,
regardless of sexual passions,
all three in one,
reside between sacred WinWin
healthy multiculturing hope
and secular monoculturing LoseLose despair,
pathological,
totalitarian,
fundamentally anti-evangelical.

But,
why would Rabbi Heschel
be a teaching icon
for a Catholic Religious Education Director?

Who can still remember
a Jewish girl child
who knew more Deep Learning Wonder
and Awesome Sacred Ecology
than could be erased
by MisEducation
settling for bleached out lies
against multiculturing mysticism,
eco-spiritual matriotic experience
of warm radiant days
and dualdark NewMoon
revolutionary nights.

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Gay Yeast Ginger Bread

I know something about being a GLBT Ginger,
the undress and redress of our left leaning politics,
like sacred naked communion
for Therapeutic Warriors.

At my best,
when adolescence urged HisHer ugly ambiguous head
through pubescent tail,
I wondered if other fire redheads
and sun speckled skins
felt this co-passioned love,
desire beyond procreative need
to touch,
embrace,
to smell,
to taste,
but not to own.

How could I have known
difference between my Ginger sensuality
and gay male nervous sexuality
without more comparative communion?

Although,
in hindsight,
perhaps not quite so much commingling
of sacred elements
I invested with integrity
for sorting out these red
and blue-black,
purplish and heated
ultra-violet distinctions
of warm wet rainbow Gay ecopolitics,
with Ginger red-yin differences,
influences,
tinctures seductive and reductive,
distinctions inductive and deductive;
Integrity of wild red unrest.

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PolyBoxes of Tradition

I faced alarming paradoxes
as I headed toward puberty.

First,
my King James Bible-belting parents,
extended family,
and all-hopelessly-WHITE farm community
taught me

God loves me
and all the children,
red and yellow,
and black almost as much as white.

That felt good
but then I learned God hates me
because I became queerly obsessed
with hot guys,
and not hot girls.
So, God created me
so He could hate me.
That seemed like poor planning to me,
and I was still in fifth grade.

Then I learned that God had given me two extraordinary gifts:
Possibly unmeasurable intelligence,
and so,
my grade-school principal warned
my evangelical farmer parents,
we were not to be surprised
if I was and saw this Earth
in a somewhat different way.

My second gift
was the envy of all good Bible-belted teenagers.
I could sing with the angels.

So,
the God of Infinite Love
is my Creator
and I am His Frankenstein Queer
with a mind and singing voice to soar,
full of Grace.

You and I might both be surprised
how long it took to figure out
Something is very wrong with this picture,
and I don’t think it is just me.
It was merely everyone else I knew and trusted
in that Bible-belted time.

So I sang for them in full voice
but gave as little voice to my sexuality as possible.
I wrote papers and test responses
in full A+ voice
but told no one
I knew they were asking wrong questions
for me to answer with full-versed integrity,

Free to sing with David and Jonathon
free of magic superstitions
standing in for mythic polypathic wisdom
of Solomon

Not to divide innocent organic Promise
God has conjoined as Love
of and for children,
red and yellow,
black and white,
gay and lesbian,
bisexual and transgender

And, yes, even straight-faced
Bible-belting out Hate
and Supremacist Evangelical Christian Colonizing InBred Correctness,
while continuing to give birth
to hidden,
shamed and blamed queer Grace
of a Loving God
polypathically immense,
deep and wide,
future through past
regeneratively just
and peaceful
and wickedly funny

Because if we cannot laugh at our egocentric stupidities,
then we must cry out for cosmic tragedy.

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Political Short-Circuits

A problem with fundamentalist short-circuits
is their Left-dominant tendencies
over RightBrain polypathic-polyphonic resonant feelings.

Fundamentalism shrinks Left-RightBrain Both-And
WinWin ecopolitical thinking,
strategizing,
democratizing,
domesticating,
creolizing.

For example,
imagine your nationalistic domestic policies
to pit those who victoriously have
against marginalized and criminalized lepers,
parasites, really,
in your not-so-humble,
vaguely fascist,
opinion,
are not going so well
as you might have Republican conservationally predicted.

You need something
you know everyone, of importance, will champion,
so you point out that transgenderal confusions
are not appropriate to military-industrial’s bottom-line
compete unto death
monoculturing focus.

Transgenders must, then, be an unnecessary economic liability
and political loyalty risk
because they aren’t decisively anything fundamentally patriotic,
much less appropriately straight patriarchal.

Unfortunately,
for the fundamentalist Either-Or nonthinker,
without richly constant and diverse healthy relationships
with any ecopolitically multicultural depth,
what might sound like a political big win
over little inconsequential losers,
breaks down with actual one-on-one experience.

The anti-transgender agenda
breaks down because too many sergeants
and corporals,
lieutenants leaking counter-factuals
to admiring admirals
and generalist generals
about the long history
of incredibly excellent military-industrialized service
individual transgender personnel
in the thousands
have delivered in the past,
unlike a dysfunctional bicameral Congress
and a sociopathological White House.

Transgender co-intelligence
tends to understand
cooperative media economies
and political persuasion.
That’s a bicameral nest of honey bees
you don’t want to fundamentalistically mess with,
because they will make you look politically stupid
and economically bereft of moral integrity.

It’s rather like believing health-assurance climates
of care-receiving
and for mutual healthcare-giving
is just a Democratic women’s eco-survival issue
when your own nationalistic patriarchal prostate
is growing in a cancerous viral,
self-imploding,
wu-wei.

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Dancing Through Swamps

Mom, did you hear the news about patriarchy today?

Yes, dearest son!
Or no…
I’m not sure.
You mean the gender translation problem?

Not sure we had a problem,
just an honest mistake
we might more empathically suppose.

Perhaps I am too paranoid,
hunting conspiracies
and thereby gathering folly,
yet reversing ancient scriptured words
for penis and vagina
smells hellfire brimstone intentional to me.

So much for my plans to become a priest.

I am so sorry your lack of a vagina
now feels emasculating of your future,
my great-loved son.
What vocation remains
for you to find
now you have become the infertile son
of a sacred matriarchal Priest?

Mom, really?
Tell me you’re not pursuing ordination again.

Why not?
We talk about a priest shortage
brought on by massive defrocking of priests
without the newly requisite vagina.

Maybe I could go into religious education.
Yet, truth told
my head’s not in it,
nor was that an implied penile reference,
teaching all those boys
how and why
when and where
they must now become subservient
to the more robust virtues
of the more sacred vagina.

Maybe you could teach in an all girls school?

But,
I don’t feel like an ecopolitical after-thought,
ready to slurp up only mainstream leftovers.
This reverse translation issue
feels unnatural to me.

Well, of course it does, my son,
you don’t have superior vagina wisdom.

Maybe I need a sex change.

Maybe we all need some trans-regenerational
re-education.

If you say so.
You’re the one for nurturing vagina dialogues.

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Deviating Sisters

One of my sisters believes I chose to be queer.

Did you remind her
you had no more choice about chasing guys
than she did?

Yes.
But her favorite televangelist
says I must be mistaken,
or just lying,
because who wouldn’t choose to be hated
by all the hetero homophobes
like televangelists,
right?

That makes no sense.
She can’t really believe
you would choose to belong
to any repressed and humiliated minority,
especially during early onset of puberty,
when every girl and boy in any culture
is terrified of becoming different,
or special,
or weeded out of the clickety-clak pack.

Well, as she sees it,
she is in a LoseLose double-bind.
Either I chose to be queer, and am thereby demented,
or God graces all forms of WinWin sexual expression,
which would be contrary to her homophobic enculturation,
so it is easier to believe I am nuts
to choose perversely
than to consider herself nuts
not to choose more graciously,
especially with regard to God’s creative capacity for love,
rather than simplistic judgments
which look and smell and sound like patriarchal sexism
more than radical fertility of God’s healthy wealth
of incarnating love for all children,
red and yellow,
black and white,
gay and straight
and shades of grey transgenderal,
each is precious in our multiculturing
nurturing
MotherEarth’s sight.

What about your other sister?

Oh, she agrees.

With what, or whom?

She agrees we’re all nuts.

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Dear KKK

When you’re on top already,
speaking King of the US Mountain,
if you are among the ecopolitical elite
in comparison to those you would remain even more separated from
than is currently the case,
then your separatist position
is also a position to maintain and/or increase your comparative supremacy.

Only if you were a klan of black feminist lesbians and transgenders.
who just want to be left alone,
can you offer a mission statement favoring increased ecopolitical separation
without also taking a position of wanting to sustain or strengthen your comparative absence of supremacy.

Assuming you are still basically white males
under those sheets,
I believe you are mistaken in believing you are for more separation
between the races
and not also for continuing,
and, even better,
increasing your comparative supremacist ecopolitical position
with the help of social niceties like apartheid.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.
On the other hand,
perhaps if you could recruit more broadly,
diversify your Klan to include the black feminist lesbians,
and transgenders,
to also begin receiving more than their fair share of this good society’s goods,
then that would certainly help your public image
in the racial-supremacist not-very-Christian
cognitive dissonance department.c

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