Tag Archives: mental health

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Raising ChildFriendly Communities

When disuniting yang’s admittedly subjective supremacy
debates against disforming yin’s non-objective wimpiness,

Then yin with yang,
like right with left
ego/eco-covenanting crisis wanderers
sojourn between win/win and lose/lose anawim,
learning to speak against vulnerable emigrants
absorbing dualistic debates.

These two now mutual antagonists are most motivated
to leave their win/lose wilderness wanderings,
in urgent search here for a more secure dialogical sanctuary
away from emerging outside/inside climates
of increasingly rabid pathology.

Learning to ask stretching win/win cooperative left/right questions,
like how can we universally tolerate non-listening pathologies
without fragmenting our unitarian interdependent doxologies?

How can we exchange therapeutic questions
with universal integrity
for tolerating only nontoxic answers
without some unitarian communal sanctuary
for deep learning more expansive not not tolerant
of active hope
to sing and dance
more globally together?

With no ego-adolescent inappropriate supremacists
left hopelessly
and passively behind
for right-wing monoculturing punishments
or insufficient left-wing lack of universally empathic love.

Is it possible to celebrate
a virtuously interdependent circle
only intolerant of unreflective win/lose tolerance
for received colonizing
and monoculturing v multiculturing
dualistic Earth evolving views
through either/or?

Rather than securing a cooperatively held
inside/outside-justice climate space
for all bicameral both/and nondual dipolarities
appositionally tolerating paradox

Worthy of harmonic wu-wei
in-between tipping points
toward healthy with harmonic integrity
economies paid co-redemptively forward
in powered political relationships
of mutual forgiveness
for publicly implicit win/lose assumptions
deforming childhoods past.

 

 

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The UnAlter Call

Our UU ecofeminist minister
was verbally accosted one Sunday morning
after celebrating multicultural peace
and respect
and integrity
sufficient to restore private ego- and public eco-justice.

This was far too much to take in,
to peacefully and holistically rake in,
for a visiting,
perhaps stalking,
apartheid anti-socialist

Whose most engaging
personable mentors and teachers
had already shared the correct win/lose answers,
either true or false,
either sacred or secular,
either spiritual strength or natural relativistic evil
of right-brain’s both/and integral tolerance-stretching levels,

Which his left-brain never over-indulges
much less dances
or sings with,
in multicultural head and heart voice.

So he angrily confronted
our UU minister
with “You must not tolerate such eclectic multicultural celebration!
These and those deviants are too wounded by original sin
for God to authoritatively save
from your universally wrong uniting perdition.
We need non-partitioned apartheid to sever us best
from those others, too wildly sensual and sinful worst
misbegotten creatures of Satan!”

“I cannot tolerate such radical integrity
or even, maybe odd, tolerance
to sing and dance,
to sit and pray,
to stand and march
polypathically and polyphonically together.
Especially on a sacred Sunday morning
when you should be worshiping God of time’s revolutionary creation,
polyculturally completed in seven 24-hour days
and monotheistic nights.”

“You should be on your knees
to the One true jealous and punishing win/lose Father!”

Our ordained covenant-keeper of universal resonance
and unitarian resilience,
concerned about whether Father MonoGod might be left-brain armed,
informed her avowed antagonist,
a clear and way too present threat
to building interdependent win/win webs
where all his win/lose walled-off answers
somberly declared ‘don’t even think about feeling deviantly
about anything!’

“Like you
I do not tolerate intolerance
when it is shouted against me,
but perhaps when morally appropriate boundaries for tolerance are asked
and invited for discussion
while actually hoping for some response
that could include all of us
if willing to change enough
to tolerate compassionate criticism
for not beginning with questions “Why?”
before providing answers to What
you and I must not find
appropriate to tolerate.”

Then she asked me to drum our drums
and sing a healing song
while she danced and shook a consecrated rattle
in smoky incensed circles
like any witch doctor might think to sternly do,

Whether tongue in cheek
or not
I could not say,
as I was singing
and beating her rhythms
with integrity of tolerance,
in mutual celebration
of great transitional nudging questions

And not not knotted paradox
of not tolerating double-bound intolerance
within as not without

And hating haters
which seems difficult for consistent self-esteem
and win-me/win-you co-integration,
or even win-left/win-right ego/eco-transubstantiation.

Our mono-supreme nationalist,
hater of radical sabbath love,
did not speak of his surprise
but effectively and affectively acted
with discomforted exit
and discomforting alarm.

I’m sure with many questions
but probably not better ones
than his pre-existing either/or condition
would allow in tolerable responses.

Which seems sad.
A lost opportunity,
for our ego/ecofeminist minister
and music me,
to nudge and stretch and grow
our tolerant co-integrity

To tolerate violating answers
to win/win questions
he, then we,
forgot to ask
about this paradox of hating haters
and only loving privileged lovers

Reminding me of several songs
about growing in love with love’s mankind,
but not sabbath people
in heat against hate,
sad about despair,
glad about integrity of wealthy mental health.

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Hating Outside Haters

Like warring against faithful warriors,
I host these inside spirited voices
sometimes LeftWing win/win
and sometimes RightWing suboptimal win/lose,

Now outwardly accelerating toward deniable lose/lose climates–
narrow-minded nationalism
patriarchal religious privileged truth
xenophobic fears my own species will survive
to kill all others,
nihilism,
entropic dead ego-less apathy
un-ecosystemically pathological.

RightWing cynicism
feels like my hungry camouflaged wolf
impatiently waiting
for a kleptocratic
privileged White-Hetero terrorist’s manly clothing
to sniff
then hate.

Yet, in silent LeftWing waiting for heroic deliverance,
in-between these SpiritSanctuary daytime Voices
of imagined ego/eco-consciousness,

Some voices, persuaded by compassionate universal feelings,
and others, more heuristically ambivalent,
hold out for immortal winning EarthTribe space

And, most coveted of all,
re-winning Paradise throughout remaining timeless time
for restoring just ecosystemic healthy EarthSoul
and active peace, communion
ego-celebrating SpiritVoices

More win/win attuned
in better sung and danced
health harmonic questions.

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Why Positive is Healthier

Positive values,
like health
integrity
resilience
compassion
empathy
are not best built
from Yang’s strong conserving top negative emotions
down to Yin’s struggling positive flow-power intention
toward winning nutrition
while winning integrity’s future nurture.

Health care core values
and truly wealthy WinWin communication manners,
grow out from Yinternal Zero (0)
to Yang’s +1.00 holistic co-passionate presence,

+1/0 = 0.(-,-)percent intra-mematic binomial experience,
WinWin double ego/eco-binary,
yin’s short-term compressed
suppressed double-bound
intrapersonal WinWin potential flow-power
returning revolutionarily back out
to recover 2020 mutual sensory-neural adoption
sacred baptismal eco-acclimating adaption
secular/sacred re-marriage
positive health confirmation
transubstantiation of natural/spiritual elements,
nature/nurture climates
of healthy left-embodied/right-mind
win-win integrity’s long-term
positive liberal restoration
inviting less negative conserving retribution
for sins of our mutually ignoring left/right
non-communal past.

Positive faith values,
like health,
are best built
from Yin/Yang ZeroSoul center
here and now
on out through backward transference
and forward projection
Win/Win
Yang/Yin double-binding
ego/eco-global balance.

So says my natural law
and multiculturally rewarded GodVoice
and my spiritual Win/Win rebirthing
holonic BeautyMuse right-hemisphere
here/now, listening in then breathing out
yang/yin
knowledge/wisdom
deducted/inducted
breathed in outside/breathed out inside
autonomously in-between silent Shadow rhythmic
health/wealth whispers of posterity/negentropy

+1 polynomial Yang with (-,-)0 polypathic binomial yin
in-between male/not-not female-soul
midway uracil/cytosine
hydrogen/helium
ego-nature/eco-soul
resiliently restorative integrity
multiculturally revolutionary peace with ego/eco-justice
health with wealth restoring
secular with sacred
co-operating +self/(-,-)other identity/individuation re-education

From inside deep learning (0) here
to outside 1/(-,-)percent binomially now there,
not from top toward bottom,
but from (-,-)1 original bottom of fragmenting Time
to +1.00 outside integral win/win Space.

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CoOperative Mindfulness

Every newly innocent day
after complexly creolizing night dreams
I hear and smell and taste and see and feel
some thing
some co-related becoming
that more and less
kills me
with delight and terror,
that leaves and comes over me,
another weedy needle
in Earth’s haystack
celebrating integrity’s light.

This is what I am born and unborn for–
to taste and see
to ecologically speak and theologically listen,
to lose my fragmented ego
inside this just-right healthy spirited world–
to instruct our virally competing RightWing dominance
over and over
in co-acclimating joy
and Left-wealth of Right-health acclamation.

Nor am I thinking and feeling
about the ecstatic exceptional,
the terrifying LoseLose fearful,
the madly dreadful,
the lavishly extravagant
loves and hates–
but of the everyday.

The green commons,
the ordinary grey-scaled drab,
the daily ego-withering practiced presentations
competition principles
WinLose evolutionary policies
LoseLose devolutionary powers.

Good bilateral intelligence
of deductive thought
with inductive feelings,
EcoSoul reminds EgoSelf,
How can we help each Other
by healthing our Selves?

Egos grow wise
with such WinWin teachings
as both these and not not those–

The untrimmable in-between Left with Right bright
of Earth’s co-acclimating enlightenment,
Ocean’s fertile shine,
Prayers nutritionally offered
out of strong-rooting common grass…

 

Note: Structure, some word choices, title all influenced by Mary Oliver’s “Mindfulness”

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Meta-Poly ReGenerative Paths

Verbal thoughts of LeftBrain polynomials
follow feelings not not RightBrain polyphonic
when both respect our interdependent polypaths,

Because harmonic feelings,
unlike thoughts of flight or fight,
are much more fleeting
effluently failing and fading away,
while midway winning and gaining toward
RightBrain autonomically faster than plodding LeftBrain calculations
nominations
labeling stagnations
enthymematically static staging stations.

Slower LeftBrain thoughts,
but in-between manically
and depressingly essential
for healing obsessive Win/Lose fighting words against non-verbal actions
and compulsive Lose to Win another day-fleeing absence
of effective Win/Win polypathic thoughts
and cooperatively communicating eco-political responses

Resolutions toward geo-empowering/disempowering climates
of internal/external polynomial healthy bilateral
Zero SoulZones
of EarthRights life,
not EgoWrong death,
chosen bicamerally Win/Win wealthy health

Where verbal LeftBrain thoughts and non-verbally hearted feelings polyphonic
follow RightBrain temporal healthy/pathological feelings
not yet polynomially balanced
and yet not not truly
and synergetically polypathic
integral
nutritional DNA’s long-term healthy wealth
optimizing integrity’s thought/feeling potential.

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Dear Ivy

Dear Ivy,

I am sorry we did not receive even just a moment to say goodbye
and thank you to each other
for all those school bus rides we took together,
you in your harness,
and me in my wonder
about what’s coming next
from your talking head
to mine.

It is time for me to move on
to another student,
but I am happy to leave you in Miss Josie’s care.

I know she will enjoy your time
invested in each other,

Listening and taking turns speaking kindly with each other,
Singing and maybe even a little dancing together,
reading and drawing as light and bumps allow.

Maybe you can teach each other
some new KnockKnock jokes.

KnockKnock.
Who’s there?
Sandi.
Sandy who?
Sandy sandwiches
are not good for you.

KnockKnock.
Who’s there?
Josie.
Josie who?
Jo see for yourself,
Open the door!

I am grateful to have so many silly and lovely memories
of you
to take with me.

And, the greatest farewell gift you could give me
is your reassurance
that these same warm and happy memories
of us
are what you will carry with you
throughout your great adventurous journey
into well-being.

Warmly yours,

Sandi

Sandi who?
Sandy snacks
are not so good for you.

Note:

My behaviorally disordered ADHD and fetal alcoholic daughter, with abandonment issues and deep-seeded food anxiety issues, suddenly lost her long-standing school bus aide, probably to compassion burn-out.  Ivy can be a profound motivator of impatience in those around her, even with deep and widely developed caregiving and receiving skills. This is the farewell that I think Ivy would have found more therapeutic than the isolating complexities of disappearance without explanation or expressed gratitude for what did co-relationally work for so long.

To be clear, not saying goodbye was an administrative decision from above; not what Ivy’s aide wanted for herself or for Ivy.

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The Neighbor’s Wife

He’s been struggling with depression,
She said, so then have I.

It’s our bad news
that competing depressions
breed more contagiously
than our cooperative feeding happiness.

Yet our good news grows:
Depression and positive impression
are equally contagious passions
pastimes
eruptions into changing flowstreams of consciousness,
evolving conscientiousness,
naked intention,
interdependent awareness,
enchantment and disenchanting stories,
natural causes spiriting effects causing co-acclimating affects,
positive and negative passions,
pressures,
impressions,
compression.

I’ve been struggling against his self-repression,
she said,
so then he worries about his oppressive powers
financial and political and emotional,
physical and mental.

He doesn’t hit me
or any sentient being
but scares me when he hits
and manhandles against his phone,
kicks against his car,
strikes against his walls and doors and windows,
his property he most interdependently cares about,
relies upon.

This chronic environment of fear,
seeing his violent anger
causes our climate anxiety
and a lack of safely transparent expression,
chronic non-vulnerable repression.

The difference between my suppressed fear feelings
of repression
and his depressed anger feelings,
threatening to disinvest oppression
despite his great attraction to Us,
is a real-talk difference
only if we both know
we are each free to affordably leave,
cut our future health-opportunity losses,
without threat of violent and impoverishing repercussions.

While a free Get Out Of Jail card
and a blinking Safe Exit sign
over our back doors
and front doors
and aside windows
are not much for sharing journeys toward active compassion,
co-operative wonder,
interactive awe,
mutual health and happiness,
prosperous food for mental fitness,
Yet neither is flood insurance
a sign of bad faith in safe and dry land
mutually affordable re-assurance.

Oppression
is aggressive repression
without freedom to exit

And ego repression
is eco-systemic depression
without mutual freedom to catch and re-catch compassion
with and for each faithful interdependent Other,
sentient and sensed as a safe alliance
for absorbing resonance

And practicing mutual reliance,
practicing re-alliance,
practicing integrity of positive contagious co-passions.

Negative depressions stem from lonely longing
origins internal and external,
As positive impressions
grow from practiced compassion,
Solidarity belonging and bred
within eco-cooperative fed
root nutritional systems,

Fitness energy for actively appreciating
each wounded and wounding Other,
including hims
and hers,
transparently discussing fist-vulnerable hands
and heads,
and stomping, kicking feet,
and bad-news phones
and unreliable cars
and imprisoning homes
and patriarchal supremacists

As if all lives
and interdependent relationships
mattered
for continuing depressive competitions
and for altering impressive cooperations.

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Compassion for TeleMarketers

I’m still waiting for my first automated rifling phone call,
Scripted to begin:

Hello Gerald Oliver Dillenbeck!
What would you like to health invest in this wealthy day?

So I could answer with
Compassion, even for telemarketers
of narcissistic death technologies.

I’m still waiting for Donald John’s first non-automated
non-violent internal recall:

Hello Donald John!
What would we,
NorthAmerican democratic residents
and global Allies of Earth,
like to health invest in with you?
Pursuing WinWin outcomes,
today and every compassionate day and night
to lead by following deep silent “we” listening.

To let go of ego’s Narcissus fascination
To grab hold of reborn EarthMother compassion,
co-operative enchantment,

To uncover even more patience with mutual disenchantment,
disdain,
To discover loyalty to domestic and international non-violence,
To recover choice to avoid aggressive WinLose
and nihilistic LoseLose strategies
in blind and deluded bad faith
that short-term loss of nutritional sufficiency
is essential for eternal redemption.

Artifacts of steadfast compassion,
polypathic
polyphonic
multi-nomial
have never been found
in seeds of violence,
monotheistic or polytheistic
and all realistics in-between
elitism and compassion for narcissism
within and without,

Sometimes grieving for ignorant foolish sins and sinners
and sometimes briefly triumphant, manically ecstatic,
despite inevitable losses
to demon death.

Newborns bond most robustly without such fears
yet,
and most resiliently when matriarchal compassion
is not unduly compromised
by aggressive patriarchal corrections,
violent domestic warnings,
threats to defer and extinguish a positive
healthy
compassionate primal relationship.

MotherEarth,
Green Goddess Gaia,
AnimaMundi,
Holonic MatriarchalSpirit,
when newborn
and revolving toward future mature networks
of organically sustained lifelines,
experienced Her just-right sacred sanctuary space
and perpetually revolutionary NowTime
in FatherSun bright
and darkly outside night

CoPassion of a personal planet-wide resilience,
Her familial nature Spirit
historically emerges
from this compassionate positive light/dark nondualistic balance
more prominent than merely nurturing patriarchal narcissism,
cultural dominance,

Until YangLeft finally sleeps
longing to reconnect within YinRight’s dualdark matriarchal compassion.

Sacred or secular cooperative outcomes of compassion,
like health and climate care,
can be narcissist seen as ego-building experience.
Narcissism is not only egotistically privileged
but politically distorted against democratic principles
of nature/spirits, co-operative.

Autonomy of EgoManiacal obsessions
ignores both interdependent nurturing root systems
and future flowers of compassion’s healthy redevelopment,
healing narcissism’s past aggressions.

Gaian compassion,
EarthMother co-operativity,
EcoFeminist resilience,
personally salvific evinced
by historic political empowerment
in those days before a dangerously toxic distinction arose
between economic and ecological compassion,
One calling for more capital co-investment
and the other calling us toward global communion.

When HeteroSapiens were yet a NewBorn species,
a glint in Golden Ruler CoPassion eyes
of FatherSun
with MotherEarth’s cooperative light
already empowered ecotherapeutic compassion.

Meanwhile,
I’m still waiting for my first personal phone call
to begin:

Hello Gerald O Dillenbeck!
What would you like to compassionately invest in
this personal and political co-operating day?

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