Tag Archives: narcissism

Foggy forest with large trees and intertwined exposed roots covered in moss
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Trusting Peace

The organic building of a coordinated artist
begins with reconstructing competitively clumsy LeftBrain technicians.

Whether learning to play the piano
or learning to communicate in some new language,
learning to adopt
or adapt
norms and nuances of some novelty,
human nature starts, and started, with Elder RightBrain
inducing autonomic pre-programmed neurosystemic receptivity
pre-historic
pre-verbal
pre-anthropological
embodied inside/outside resonance v dissonance
triggering changes in attraction/distraction
feeling/touch
taste/smell
pleasure/displeasure
and, eventually,
as plants evolved persons,
sight/sound.

Fluid inducted feelings, to this day,
in these developing anthropocentric bodies,
evolve toward deductively remembered,
articulatable thoughts

Reductively decomposing complex multisensory memories
of ancient communion communication resonance
and discommuning discommunication dissonance
we notice in commensurable neurosystemic experiences
including preverbal mammalian
attracted in some positive co-empathic way,
inviting further transgenerationally trans-speciated trust.

But, stumbling across a personally anomalous situation,
ambiguously felt,
having become historically aroused by novelty
we may trust due to anticipating received resonance
or distrust due to anxiously perceived dissonance

Moving toward aggressive competitions
too loud, stinky, unsightly, unsavory, threatening
to ignore in some risk-tolerant way,
falling short of co-passion
anticipating trusted rewards
engaging win/win positive co-intelligent
communicating relationships.

From positive trust expansions
and from negatively threatening attritions,
our deductive LeftBrain builds categories
of neurosystemic patterns
to reduce organic mystery’s holistic gestalt
into cause-effect history
recycling spiraling parts and portions
proportions and distortions
appropriations and malpropriations

Until we can personally predict
to our win/win
win v lose
lose/lose hypostatic satisfaction,
and sometimes hypnotizing horror,
how to regenerate/degenerate
novel trusted/distrusted/untrusted expression
within our own behavioral mindbodies

Through deliberate,
step by discrete sequential step,
memorizing cognitive performance technique until this new pattern,
novel sequence of embodied rhythms
integrates into an interdependently cooperative
inside/outside resonant engagement

Becoming “second nature”
internalized,
as ingrained by neurosystemic trust
as smelling our way back home.

But, this second nature,
after learning to perform a love song
also becomes a resonantly engaging emotive narration

While a hate story,
the kind you might hear in a military boot camp
and a fear-triggering revival tent,
feels dark
disengaging ballistic trauma

Multigenerational RightBrain systemic trauma
venomously screams threats at anyone mistrusted
as hostile to our ego-defensive self
in some disturbingly unenlightened way

Becoming incorporated into Left v Right Brain
reiterative oppositional
discommunicating absence of positive trusting flow.

Technically learned performance
moves from LeftBrain dominant cognitive minds
toward RightBrain-inductive co-arising bodies
of “second nature” expression,
nonverbal communication
preferentially activating already mastered
behavioral-affective neurosystemic constellations
of interior/exterior resonant activity,
as naturally engaging as writing
with your right dominant hand,
yet recessively potentiated
to bilaterally relearn
drawing scrawling left hand
re-associated literary performance.

Given all the above,
when and why would becoming a violent aggressor
become an ego-acceptable,
LeftBrain deductive dominant choice
of encultured instinctive response to “non-kin”
as opposed to “not yet kin”?

How would one become attracted to,
and sustained by,
becoming a dissonance-creating and expanding bully,
an aggressor against potentially invasive aliens,
parasites,
pests,
sinners,
criminals

You have not ever personally met
exhibiting threatening behavior
toward yourself,
or those you already perceive as “kin”?

It seems that terrorism and bullying
might also be rabidly aggressive behavioral-affective distrusting patterns
which can be as competitive communication contagious
as cooperative trust
in healthier patterns of extending win/win anticipation together
rather than thrusting and parrying apart.

In Win/Win nonzero-sum reiterative Compassionate Communication Theory,
and in feminist cooperative eco-political Reproduction Theory,
learning resonant-positive nurturing behavioral norms
anticipates mutual trust outcomes

Win/Win bilateral inside-ego/outside-eco equivalence
that normatively anticipates pay-it-forward more of the same
as long as everyone follows Left-Right confluent
behavioral-affective Golden Rule mature trust patterns
toward mutually compassionate “second nature” norms.

What positively engages Elder brainstem “first nature”
is profoundly matriarchal-cooperative
mind-trust ethotic ownership
AND body-lust erotic governance
except under Win v Lose survival pressures
of past anxiety triggering experience
as environmentally re-membered
re-presented
re-vived
and not repaired.

It is here
in anomalous primordial seas
of survival of the “I Win so You Lose” fittest
where might makes dissociated ego’s narcissistically right
to survive today

Despite anxious bodies knowing
that performing hostilities by accessible aggressive means
predicts more of the actively distrusting same,
or even more
escalating risk of loss tomorrow.

But, this is not normative
“first [original matriarchal-love] nature”
just as it is not first-nurture-trust,
for if zero-sum survivalist toxicity
were our AntiGolden Rule primordial soup
from which we arrived at this time on Earth,
then human LeftBrain dominant nature
could never have evolved
decompositional cognitive technique at all.

Declaring private, or outrageously public, wars
against alien terrorists
is a traumatically compromised zero-sum choice
to play a negative Lose-incaste Life and Lose-outcaste Life Game
of despairing distrust

Unjustified and unrighteous terrorism
provoked by the chronic anxiety perception
no tolerable mistrust option has been diplomatically learned
throughout anthropocentric history
that we have not yet maturely and responsibly tried.

The zero-sum “I must win” so “You must lose” of Either-Or bottom-line
caste-preserving capitalism,
with a preference for competitive LeftBrain performance
rather than cooperative RightBrain engagement,
is an inhumane economic
and demonic caste-supremacist political choice
still denying opportunities to extend our first-nature
trust-nurturing
neurosystemic health
and environmental feelings
smells
tastes
touched by sacred EarthMother’s safety.

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A tall futuristic fortress reflected in a lake with glowing tree roots and waterfalls under the water
Uncategorized

Lusty Book of Lists

A book of lists
is what I need
to absolve Earth’s Tribes
of rampant greed.

Before and after lists,
being and becoming fists,
masculine and feminist mutual mentoring trists
transubstantiating troubling transformations.

I would like to hug
a warm and fuzzy theology
with prophetic philosophical appeal
to ethical reasons and taste buds
both hunters and gatherers
might sing and dance
together.

Nationalism,
like narcissism,
only bigger and worser,
is out.
So Earth-centrism is in.

Egocentrism
like eco-centrism
only inward instead of also outward,
is out,
so ecological natures back in
balancing staminate/pistillate cooperatives,
consensual yang/yin co-intelligence.

I need an updated list of reasons why
as red flames out
green grows in
and when they color in together
we rediscover rich brown integrity
of less anthropocentric polycultures,
reweaving deep dark polyamorous syncretism,
for healthier Earth rooting stories,
not only compassionate logos taught,
but also pleasure mythos revived.

I love this list
of red becomes purpling
peopling nurturing equalities
as blue states of Earth-centric redevelopment
redeem aquamarine green,
together ultra-violet
non-zero soulful octaves
Win/Win his/her-story
of cobinary passion.

I live these self-regenerating lists.
They move around
pistil-in with stamen-out
to re-emerge revival,
Earth’s fractal-rooted crown
double-binding integrity loving
living
transcendent generosity
listing forward ecotherapy
listing back toward indigenously swelling gratitude
for these organic EarthTribe lists
of sacred ebb and flow.

We need an historic list
of lusts
cooperatively owned
and together self-managed

How ancient animism birthed modern monotheism
through countless regenerations
of taoist transcendent stamen
and immanent pistil
panentheism
birthed co-arising nonduality

Patrimonious Yang penetrating
matrimonious Yin circluding
trinitarian inter-religious midways

Sacred organic networks
ego-cognitive Left
eco-intuitive Right
as Mother Earth’s shabbat

Beloved internal-mind/external-body habitat
AnthropoScenic climate balance
both universally unfrightening enlightening
and invitingly
unitingly
empowering organic Golden Rule
crown/root intelligent brightening.

I need a list
composed by pre-historians
and investigative journalists
of what happened
when we had no bad news

Where we had no commercial headlines
to gossip about
and only loves to share
with
and in
and on
and for
and of
anthro’s earthy blessings.

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Two people sitting side by side on rocky ground watching the sunrise over mountains with mist
Uncategorized

Baby Boomers and Bummers

Most Baby Boomers started out hoping to leave life
having continued our Great ReGenerativity,
progressively recycling boundless growth
of optimal Win-Wealth is also Win-Health.

We are the last human generation
with confidence we could leave more than we have taken in.
To give back,
to pay forward
investment in Earth’s cooperative health and safety insurance,
re-assurance.

In this early post-millennial era,
we have a great transitional dissonance
between those who continue believing it is merely realistic,
rationally nihilistic,
to give up on this hopelessly disconnected
non-renewable
non-inheritable dream,
already not accessible to human nature’s consciousness
of internal and external climate disruptions.

And, on the other hand,
there remain those of relentless active faith
that we are here at this time,
invested in this transitional moment,
increasing Win/Win potential
transforming short- and long-term
evolving compassionate lifetimes

To learn from Father Sun’s warming voice of Wind
to balance healthy consumption
with wealthy production
of perennial renewables

To listen
for life’s relentlessly springing up reinvestment
opportunities,
not lifetime for ignoring Win v Lose waste,
risking positive neuro-energy’s potential peacetime resources.

As we turn from seeking regenerative integrity
for the span of one humanely natural generation,
toward the span of one humane-divine
MotherEarth FatherSun prime co-relational life span,
old monotheistic WinWe v LoseThey issues,
flying under banners of nationalistic narcissism,
fade into the waste stream of survival of the bullyist

More synergetically renewed by a new EarthTribal cooperative ownership,
a self-with-other Win/Win democratizing
inter-religious identity
nurturing caregiving Light
and receiving Power

Healthy compassion
with all organisms not pathologically hoarding wealth
of divisive nations,
of dissociated egos,
as this new Left with Right
double-binding
ego/eco-intelligence
for evolving renewable lifetime opportunities
and compassionately deniable risks of addiction
to anthropocentric narcissism.

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Uncategorized

Prurient ThrowDown Interests

Last evening I noticed another disconcerting Trump headline.
This felt and smelled more like a deadline
for disintegration
than a lifeline toward integrity
of democratic health and prosperous safety

Happy front and more perfect center
in our US Constitution,
which I remember him swearing to protect
right before reassuring all of us
he is here to listen to everyone.

Republicans and Democrats and Libertarians and Greens,
and whatever other patriotic party affiliations
he might be able to discover
and learn from
on his new Presidential executive ordering journey
into twitterland.

Anyway,
the headline was about White House Rumblings
of an assault on the State legalized marijuana industry.

My first reaction
Why?
Why would a federal administration
that has just finished reassuring all fifty States
that where students poop and pee in school should,
by right, rest solely at the state level to regulate,
then,
almost in the next inordinate breath,
also send out this alarming message to all fifty States
that it has become a new federal health
and national safety defense issue
that my kids should prefer the alcoholic beverage industry
over the THC industry.

I’m still wrapping my brain around how that could possibly be defended,
construed,
framed,
promoted,
gullibly bought and stoned cold sold
as a consistent reading of
“listening to everyone”

About constitutionally protected federal rights
to health and safety,
to well-integrated,
cost effective,
consistent,
or at least sane public policy.

I believe it was a congressman,
and not a “prurient interest” judge,
who said he could not define pornography,
but he knew it when he saw it.

This Administration, to date,
has brought us our first nakedly twittering
rapacious President
in no way discomfited
by verbal abuse
or domestic motherland violence

And now his fascist federalist tendencies
begin to look more like jacking off in public,
like pursuing his personal prurient exhibitionist hate-mongering agenda
instead of paying even lip service
to his true mandate,
the compassionate health and safe happiness
Original Intent
of not only the U.S. Constitution,
but also the Bible he laid his irreligious
self-righteous
dominant hand on

Toilet twittering
is not an economic or political act of active listening
for a healthy democratic
and wealthy multicultural society
of humane and responsible citizenry

Doing our best to follow our Golden Rule intentions,
not led by Golden Ballroom pretentions,
to at least do no alcohol-buzzed harm,
cause no further caste-privileged trauma,
and, whenever and wherever possible,
to follow a path of health,
happiness,
and polycultural prosperity.

As for DT2 himself,
I suspect he would improve his governing outcomes
by easing off the Coke
and investing more in some reefer madness,
preferably while among a large
extended family picnic,
an authentic thanksgiving banquet.

But, DT2 aside,
this White House has already become the home of nakedly prurient interests,
rather than national and state health
and environmental safety policies
and procedures,
polyamorous planning and design,
rather than retributive reaction
and assault distraction
and misanthropic wall-building.

Prurient–marked by arousing
immoderate
unwholesome (unhealthy, unsafe, unredemptive, non-therapeutic)
investment in naked
sadistic
desire.

With pornographic performance,
we witness a whole lot of immodest sexual desire,
but with the current Executive Branch of addictive rape
and pillage performance,
we become unwillingly mesmerized
by a whole lot of immodest fear and war-mongering desire.

The rampant raging desire
to play Win-Lose 0-sum games
of naked entitlement for paternal supremacy
sadistically staged
on a WinAnthro/WinEarth
Constitutional and Biblical
polyamorous Original Intent
for a cooperatively living planet.

The key operative governance, administrative, executive skills,
word here is “unwholesome” v “wholesome.”
Certainly we aren’t intending to legislate what is
marked by arousing, sometimes even immodestly so,
but still wholesome investments
in swelling democratic desire.

Wholesome is about regenerative life
polyculturally inclusive evolution,
sacredly nurturing democracy’s organic revolution

Co-redemptive peak political experiences,
bipartisan safe,
healthy choices,
even as these will inevitably lead, sometimes,
on our best compassion and pleasure days,
toward spirit-expanding natural ecstasies.

This, to me,
and for my extending multi-generational,
multi-cultural family,
sounds more like a mandate to co-invest
in health and safety industries,
with or without THC,
rather than investing further in the prurient,
inebriated,
unwholesomeness
of a nakedly sadistic
toilet twittering
White-Supremacist Castle.

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Uncategorized

Innocence

Children fill in leaking emotional cracks
in home and family’s nurturing support
with deaf and blind lies
of eternal ever after
nursing happiness

Democratic healthiness
grasped quickly
before autocratic adolescence
turns down our brighter light.

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Uncategorized

Healthy Caring

Too many times sadly
too seldom gladly
I must learn to trust
Earth’s future more

Both Father Sun’s timeless
rounds of enlightenment
and Mother Earth’s
codependent rhythms
regenerating empowerment

And this trusting more
implies unlearning
letting go of trauma’s lessons
in surviving hale and hearty
RightWing distrust

Unenlightened AnthroElitism
within our CommonEnglish languaged voice
and without other physically iconic sounds
and sights
and smells
and tastes

Feelings that matter more
than mere white privileged noise
for self-regenerative thrival
much more healthy
than mere pathic
militaristic
narcissistic survival

If we would
together,
rediscover sacred Beauty
CoPassion

CoInvested in integrity’s historic
pre-historic win/win revival
and future multiculturing
nonverbal nonviolent
communication potential.

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Uncategorized

Orthodox Experiences

I was bruised by dogmatically non-evangelical
Christ monotheistic Jehovah judgmental bad faith
of divine powers
equally entitled
to generously create love
and selfishly act out of jealousy
divine punishment for unfaithful sins
of worship omission
and secularizing commission

Prescribed by the inspired
and kleptocratically negotiated
Greek
and Latin
and English transubstantiations
of AnthroSupremacist visions
speaking
and singing
and dancing
in white male dominant translations

Royal capital is holy
next to divine monopolistic inspiration
of presumably omniscient sacred values
captured by scribes
and conserved by councils
of presumably straight white orthodox
literate males
representing ecclesial royalty

Featuring Jewish Saul
turned Christ Active Revivalist Paul
writing self-governance purification letters
suggesting that ecclesial rituals
of a polytheistic sensual nature
are the opposite
of our most monotheistic spiritual
yet HolySpirit EarthMatriarchal mindful
sacred panentheistic experiences.

I am also more metaphysically resonant
as a YangNatural/YinSpiritual co-passion Taoist
believing through deep listening
to my (and possibly our)
deepest restorative regenerous justice
Yang/Yin co-operative communication intentions
throughout male/female co-investing reproductive
cause-effect linear days
and co-empathic
regeneratively resilient
lunar recircling nights

CoPassioning
yintegral humane sexuality
as our deepest,
highest
and best sacred sensory practice
positive synergy practice
health wealthing practice
till we get ourselves
Yang in and Yintegral out
depolarizing balance
resiliently Left/Right
co-empathic
resonant dialogical praxis

Bodhisattva
co-messianic
co-passionate Left/Right
internal/external communionation
practice
verbally positive thoughts
and metaphysical theories
about nonverbal healthy felt
nonviolent physical feelings.

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Uncategorized

Empowering LifeStories

What is the main difference
between the life time of a star
and your personal trauma history?

Could it be for you,
as for me?

How long we take
to get from regenerative beginnings
in dark caved holy humble
BlackHole wombs
to degenerative desecrations
and/or therapeutic inside/outside
resonantly peaceful
light empowering ends.

What is your main difference
between personal liberation
from inside traumatic deliberation
AND outside avoiding condemnation?

At all inhibiting costs to Self
prohibitive costs to Others
disposable property costs to sacred MotherTrees
and other indigenous
sentient
residential non-taxpayers

Not to become confused
with Trumpian
“Vengeance is StraightWhiteMaleCapitalist Mine!!!”
All Narcissistic Mine!!!!!!!!!
which is the white privileged noise
of a NON-indigenous
parasitic
residential non-taxpayer

Who does not know the main difference
between the life time of a star
and His monotheistic personal trauma history.

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Uncategorized

Narcissists Unanimous

I might feel grand
aspiring to omnipotent
omniscience

Whereupon omnipresence
might feel less necessary,
or even possible,
or desirable

In a secularized
reduced
dissociated apartheid,
sacred Us v sinful Them

An omnipotently inflammatory place
for every Other individual thing
and all Other routine
and orthodox Things,

Omnipresent capital events
in anonymously rational
linear
fundamentally dualistic frames

Either sacred Me
or secularized You
will win our antagonistic win/lose
evolving worldview news

Preferably reduced from
supremely anthro-privileged
down deep into
my ego’s highest omnipotent potential
best win/win omniscience sacredly encircled
to ubiquitously favor
least global cost
and most localized efficient
ego/eco healthcare
resonant balance

In a way not omnipotently possible
nor omnipresently invited
nor yet omnisciently compassioned

If only we were more adept
at losing win/lose
and playing win/win
Gods and Goddesses,
OmniPresent Icons
and OmniPotent Idols

Inviting sacred Gaian EcoFeminist spaces,
omnisciently omnipotent places,
unconditionally disregarding
LeftBrain Iconic Narks
Phallic Idols,
profit prophets
for Narcissists Unanimous.

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Uncategorized

A CoInvested Intervention

A multicultural proposal
for a bipartisan Intervention,
not to be confused
with drilling a nervous root canal.

  1. I take responsibility

What I am feeling
about myself.

What I believe I need
for my health
and safety.

What I want
from you.

Then
What you are feeling
about yourself.

What you believe you need
for your health
and wealth of thriving resilience.

What you want
from me
to support your journey.

  1. I embrace curiosity

What I am feeling
about you.

What I believe you need
for your health
and thriving sense of safe resilience.

What I want
for you.

Then
What you are feeling
about me.

What you believe I need
for my health
and safe resilient wealth.

What you want
for me.

  1. We support compassion

What you are now feeling
about us.

What you believe we need
for our here and now health
and co-invested wealth.

What you now want
from and for
us.

Then
What I am now feeling
about MeWe communal Us.

What I now believe we need
for longterm resonant health
and resiliently balanced
mindbodied wealth.

What I now want
from and for
sacred
co-invested
Us

Doing win/win better
than addiction to avoiding
and then angrily drilling
yet another nervous root canal.

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