Tag Archives: parenting

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Parenting From Integrity

Parenting defiant trauma
attached to both hurt child
and wounded parent
needing to continue
co-invested relationships,
positive and constant,
without breaks
in healthy communication,
direct
and, if possible,
playful

Counteracting fear
that both TraumaChild
and I
will pressure ego-me
to choose a Win
for Self
to lose relationship
by distancing from Other;

To choose Me
over We.

I want to choose both Defiance
and Deep Listening
playing win to win together
co-passionate,
positive,
healthy communication

Frustrated by
Lose-Draw-Win
triage decision-making

As if emotionless withdrawn
leftbrain dominant communication
could out-perform
actively hoping
for contagious resilience,
resonant companionship,
mutual enjoyment,
bonded courage,
cultural curiosity
re-educating accurate empathy.

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Inside Outside Therapeutic Teachers

A shaman has two vocations,
inter-related,
wise teacher
and robust healer

With emphasis on noticing healthy natural systems
shared values
wealthy spiritual development of seasons
with timely regenerative change
without untimely degenerative treasons
to reason

Healers of motherland
and Her EarthTribe.

My favorite teachers
seem to remember win/win co-relationships
between right hemisphere healing feelings
and left hemisphere teaching wealthy win/win thoughts
needs
developmental goals

Whether coincidental
or not,
these wise therapeutic educators
can also speak at length
about how much we have delightedly learned
from our children
and elders,
as sandwiched parents
and teachers
with win/win pedagogical fluidity,
ego/ecosystemic healing intent
toward holy
whole
holonic EarthTribe reverence

So children and adolescents
grow into more cooperative
mature
integral
ecological-theological-ego systems-logical
young adults
when we are not confined
to the role of passive
dispassionate audience

The best unsilenced
unshuttered witnessing
and listening
are co-witnessing young sha-persons
at peer co-listening play,
win/win dialogue,
sometimes intricate discernment
more multiculturally
multigenerationally acute
democratic
transformative
than destitute
peons struggling to breathe interdependently free
despite autocratically punishing
autonomously authoritative judges
and competitive win/lose zero-sum legislators
and bipolarizing administrators

Executives rather than democratically healing sha-persons
co-teachers co-listening
and eco/theological seeding parents
recreating transregenerational
eco-healthy
ego-wealthy
bilateral shaman systems
of self/other wisdom.

I wonder if you,
a green shaman co-operator,
are more of an economic sacred upstream saver
or more of a Seize This Fully Invested EarthDay!”
yet dipolar co-arising
teaching/healing savior.

Divinely inspiring
organic ecofeminist gardeners
and farmers
deeply till life’s healing cyclic journey
systematic
nutritionally taught
financially investing
in health/wealth win/win savings,
ecological/economic winter seasoned
darkest pre-redeeming light before green revolution
dawning reasons to teach
grandly parent sharing
to prepare for spring youth regained
cooperative left hemisphere empowerment
and right hemisphere enlightenment
co-opportunities

Flowing down
and out
toward summer’s bright lit
00/00 WholeEarth revolutionary
self-perpetuating reset
verbal defining
health refining polycultural Climax

Time for Seize God/Gaia’s GreenBlessed Day
is all about drawing down investments
in each win/lose defensive contraction’s eco-political end

Preparing for counter-cultural win/win
left/right contextual
green/blue recycling
nutritional thoughts
with economic co-invested feelings

Earth root system healthy
restoring up and out to summer thrive
to fully seize this revolutionary win/win
ecofeminist green healing
Earth co-investment thriving Day

To stop monoculturing winter
seedless is hopeless
mere bare survivalist

Rivers tired of swelling thin upstream
dividing lose/lose boundaries,
transitions,
disruptions,
violent eruptions,
red revolutions

Longing to kindly close lose/lose exclusive counter-revolutions
against win/win inclusive green down stream
cooperative evolutions
back toward shunning red right-wing
patriarchal industrious excesses
no holds barred, violent left brain supremacist
anti-feminist
unwillingness to save for a future sacred thrivalist
Earth is Heaven summer

Spring secular/sacred thriving nuanced time
to replant thriving multiculturing mountains
of co-investing co-operative co-owning
what Wise ShamanElders
have nutritionally/financially prepared
for regenerations

This upswelling river
of Earth from deep down and in
flowing wide up and out
white winter survivalist contractions
for green summer thrivalist
down river tributary conjoining
merging and emerging
light and empowering
ego/eco-systemic NonZero
Zones eco-politically eternal
spiraling DNA spectral
double-binary 1Yang/0Yintegral

EarthSeasoned win/win nutritional teaching
green nonviolent ego-eco-investing
in 01/00 fractally redundant
space/time eternal sacred
EarthPrime regenerational win/win
co-investment gratitude
to teach and heal positive savings
for thriving summer sensory
nutritional ecologically balancing
co-investments win/win

Logical health educational budgeting
priorities for win/win compassionate
GoldenRule EarthShaman
multi-partisan valued
therapeutic communication

For resonant healing light
from resilient pedagogical
ego/ecological
power.

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Agree and Yet Disagree

How would you agree
and could you disagree?

Those who oppose Domestic Violence,
secretly oppose healthy
yet punishing
responsible parental exercise
of absolute patriarchal authority.

Those who protest against Police Brutality,
Bullying
Violent Communication Culture,
secretly oppose healthy
yet punishing
responsible officers of the militaristic
capitalistic peace.

Those who curse runaway capitalist
bloody patriarchal meat-eater economic privilege
of greed and white straight male supremacy
secretly support,
as if healthy
and compassionate,
irresponsible wildness
for nurturing witchy
deeply green queer
and too dearly near
alarming liberal eco-political
MotherEarth indigenous sacred healing circle
inductive and seductive
secretly
and anonymously recruiting homosexual
child-eating feminists
to communistically farm and garden
this Green/Blue Communion Living Earth.

Those who rail against anti-green climate woundedness
secretly support,
as if healthy
and compassionate,
irresponsible
naive
too liberally green win/win revolutionary love
for all EarthHealth Justice multicultural theologies
of ecologically wealthy
indigenously empowering
and integrally enlightening
eco-political
polycultural
NonZero-Sum Whole Open
continuously regenerative
self/other GoldenRule communicating
extending
reiteratively spiralling
revolutionary health/wealth bicameral relationships.

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Why Are We Here?

Why are we here?
my oppositional daughter
defiantly asks.

Because we’re not over there?
her appositional dad
too often
and frustratingly
responds.

Sogyal Rinpoche writes
“To embody the transcendent
is why we are here.”
I doubt my daughter
would find this more satisfactory,
sounds like more patriarchal malfactory.

Echeopnir Laygos has another impression,
To embody economic empowerment
and political enlightenment
is why liturgy,
communion
and transcendent meditation
are here.

So,
embodying Earth’s transcendent unity
is also how we are here;
but this too
would not satisfy my daughter’s constant questions
about why and how,
I fear.

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Waking Up Lumpy

Wake up grumpy
tired
much older than yesterday.

Day fifty-seven,
an irrationally
not nice
non-round number,
since defiantly challenging daughter,
with the contextual right-brain unhealthy intelligence
of a sociopathic alligator,
last came home from school
or anywhere without me.

Remembering her school’s response
when I suggested her six-hours-per-day aide
five days per week
not be switched out every week
or two.
She doesn’t do well with transitions
including interpersonal change,
lack of power to control
a significant Other’s time
to stay
and go.

While aware this is an issue,
their larger concern was burn-out.
Aides couldn’t tolerate the intensity
of her hostility
and constant need
need
need for attention,
for food,
for distraction,
for action,
for…

Wondering how the best of her school supporters
would feel after 228 consecutive
six-hour shifts

Without any supervisor
capable of reassuring me
or him
or her
or them
or us
of how many more to go
without adequate social distancing
within our lumpy quarantine space.

No possible reassurance
or warning
we’re just getting started,
about to end,
over the hump,
or not so much,
actually.

Perfect.

Definite only about feeling humped out
and jumped in
lack of ease,
sucked out potential for unguarded rest.

Feeling sorry for myself,
yes,
but also for her,
and for all of us
who have taken risks
to give long-term care
where receiving care in response
is not a reasonable
or compassionate
expectation of hope-filled ways,
faithful truths,
loving lives

Quietly waking up grumpy
in unsolidarity
unsolitary confinement.

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Purple Princess

My eighteen yeared daughter
living and dreaming with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome,
As she grows up and out
hopes to become

“An old princess
with long purple hair
living in a GroupHome.”

I’m not sure if this indicates
I did a shockingly good
or alarmingly bad
job as a thirteen-year dad
with positive therapeutic intent.

Until she smiles,
looks up at the blue-grey sky
with unimagined delight.

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Parents for Peace

So what sane parent
would intentionally lead their family
into internal
or external war,
right?

Well, apparently former political
and religious extremists,
neonazis,
Islamic fundamentalists,
Christian fundamentalists…

Oh, wait,
I’m not sure their Republican White Nationalist
AntiDemocratic First Amendment,
kleptocratic and oligarchical Second Amendment
LeftBrain rabidly ballistic dominant
Anti-natural/spiritual nondualistic health intentions
are yet media-conscious enough,
yet, still, these fake-Christians among us
are visible as far too comfortable
with Mammon’s military-industrial ballistic defense

So terrified of Sodom,
Parents for Terrorist Religious War
and Threat of FinalRapture Weapons
neglect to notice
their own naked butts
delightedly backing toward beastly Gomorrah.

Anyway, with or without reformed Christian NeoFascists,
Parenting for Peace
is against militarism,
possibly for the usual costly inhumane and environmental
and economic reasons,
but also because,
as mental health-recovering parents,
and grandparents,
and future great grandparents,

They see military-corporate theft
and associates
like colonialism,
and missionary zealous patriarchalism,
and sanctuary apartheid racism,
and homophobia,
and sexism,
and anthropocentrism,
and xenophobia
as corporate public health hazards.

Rabidity,
like subclimates of health,
wears both an internal, mental, spiritual face,
and an external, physical, natural Earth EcoSpace;
codependently negative, pathological,
as transectorally positive, eco/theo-logical
robust future health potential.

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Summer Hostage

Our small loop of a street
usually quiet
Today receives a loud grooming
with chain saws
and wood chippers
and diesel trucks slicing
and ruining silence
into anti-solitude.

This is my last day off
until summer school begins
in two sultry weeks.

Morning rain passed through
to breezy summer camp sun,
crisp shade tree shadows
moving slightly within lush grass
waiting for my non-motorized mower.

It feels queer…
I feel queer,
at sixes and sevens
at 67,
to trust that I need
not just more solitude
to become healthy again,
but more silence
to become vocally wealthy
again.

To go
or to stay
here
too near a State highway
trafficking toward two casinos
now more native to American economies
than Native Americans to empowerment.

This last bus
not quite upon us
while thoughts wonder
and feelings wander
about shouting sawers
and clanging chipper
banging my longing
back to a rural dirt dust-path
along side a Michigan Centennial Farm
where I knew breezy
silent
summer encampment days
of solitary
fresh freedom.

I wonder why
we can’t go home again,
Yet I can go back to childhood
solitude served up
in sacred silence
unsettling memories
of childhood freedoms lost.

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Blah Friday

I need a vacation
from vacation unbreaks.

Bad Friday
falls seven days after spring break begins,
Which is a break for some kids
and teachers without kids,
but not for grandpa parent me,
and my sociopathic daughter,
who needs the structure of small
specialized classrooms
to get through her most resilient day.

It feels healing to step outside
into softer breezy voices
green with overly optimistic promise
that Everythin gonna be aright.

Rain threatens
yet wide patches of sky blue
promise western horizon hope,
for now

Faith that tomorrow,
which feels unforgivingly far from Now,
yet stuck in Here,
I will wake to compassionate forgetfulness,
lack of memory
of nearly all black bleak Fridays
transpired,
de-valued by my owned
and negligently managed
lack of parental investment
in larger self/other care;
that old ego/eco-balancing
narrow-way game.

Tomorrow,
just another Saturday/Sunday weekend,
between BadFriday wounds
and rainy Monday
school day blues
and jazz dance in the garden
with a Great Turning shovel.

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