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Primal Voices and Choices

Paranoia feeds on dark roots.
In full bloom, everything and everyone that happens against me
happens for a sinister conspiratorial reason.
This is my felt conjecture,
to which I respond
by struggling against trust
in Other’s monopolistic monocultural Wins,
so I might survive to tolerate
yet another scrappy day of paranoia.

Pronoia feeds on everything and everyone
not out to get me
but more in to let me
happen for a blessed season
with which I am invested to resonate,
including my fair share of struggling with,
but not against,
my WinLose enculturation
so we might thrive to mutually WinWin
yet another multiculturing
polypathic
Beloved Community Way.

This is our primal ecopolitical choice,
Both-And over Either-Or,
made each moment in time’s evolving articulation
deep learning incarnation
of days and nights
within this not-paranoia and not-pronoia
in-between identity,
risk with opportunity
conjectural life.

Conservative LeftBrain Either-Or
sees a bipolar world
of either I am saved
or demonic,
either I am part of the solution
or part of the problem,
either I am True
or I am False,
only pretending to be True
to get you to become False.

Liberating Elder RightBrain Both-And
fluid feelings
multi-sensually engage in a dipolar EarthTribe
in which I experience pronoia on healthy days
and paranoia on more challenging days,
I am an integral and authentic organic part
of EarthTribe’s living win/win resolution
and part of an irreligious ecocidal global problem,

I sometimes feel unconditional warm regard
with peak win/win opportunities to Trust
and usually also feel win/lose risks of MisTrust
and occasionally paranoid panic
with deep dissociative valleys
of shadows
of death,
lose/lose despairing DisTrust.

But, even should this become bipartisan political science,
bicameral neuropsychology,
bilaterally conjectured co-intelligence,
let us not delude ourselves into a hypnotic state of academic neutrality,
ambivalently pretending either choice is equally healthy,
when ecocidal outcomes are so clearly etched in patriarchal bones
of troubling dissociative history.

Love’s mutual promise clearly points toward evolutions
embracing elegant polyculturally resonant
healthy democratic systems furthering win/win wealth,
while paranoid fundamentalist God v Man terror
degenerates toward further traumatic pathology,
afraid of our own anthro-suprema-cast
dark blaming mind v shameful body

Conjecturing fundamentally irreligious
punishing
paranoid shadows.

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Cooperative Bicameral Congress

If Yang is tea,
Yin is water.

If Yang is a vulnerable yolk,
Yin is a polyculturing transparent embryo.

If Yang is a sage ego,
Yin is a musecological body.

If Yang is fire,
Yin is air.

If Yang says Goodbye or Hello,
Yin feels Aloha.

If Yang is a convex mountain,
Yin is a concave river valley.

If Yang is a community,
Yin is communication.

If Yang is a sacred community,
Yin is re-ligious communication.

If Yang is Earth,
Yin is our Solar System.

If Yang is our enlightening FatherSun,
Yin is our empowering EarthMother.

If Yang is monotheistically sacred,
Yin is panentheistically organic.

If Yang wakes polycultured
crown polypathic Me,
Yin urges multiculturally inter-religious
root systemic We.

If Yang is inter-religious metaphysics
Yin is polyculturing environmental physics.

If Yang is 1,
Yin is 0.

If Yang is penetrative male,
Yin is receptive wombanist.

If Yang explicates future win/lose fear,
Yin implicates angry lose/lose past

If Yang explicates win/lose patrimony,
Yin implicates win/win matrimony.

If Yang explicates
universal messianic salvation,
Yin implicates
unitarian bodhisattva co-redemption.

If Yang restores EarthJustice
Yin re-ligions GlobalPeace

If Yang is 1 HumanSpirit,
Yin is 0 DivineNature

If Yang is welcoming Mind,
Yin is well-being Body.

If Yang explains compassion,
Yin implies pleasure.

If Yang is wisdom-forming Tea,
Yin is musical flowing Water.

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SunDay Before Selection

I asked my drab dressed Sabbath Teacher,
Who do you think Jesus would vote for?

As was her way
even today
she had her querulous say,
What would Jesus do?

He would ask,
and so should all of you,

Is this a loving
kind thing
to do
or not do?

Is this a loving
caring relationship
to continue,
to widen
and deepen,
to feed health,
to breed safe natural beauty wealth?

I was nearly asleep
by the time she sing-songed her predictable
faith-based dance
through the litany
of Jesus begat HealthyLove
when she delivered that last
politically curious line.

What would Jesus do
or not do
to feed and breed safe
natural
beautiful
and truly resilient wealth?

How would Jesus vote
or not vote
to feed and breed
neurosystemically resonant
resiliently sacred
peace communion wealth?
Might be how my SocialPsychology Preacher
would LeftBrain think to ask

How will each bipartisan win/win candidate
vote
or not vote,
act
or not act,
speak
or stay silent,
to feed and breed
neurosystemically healthy,
cooperative neuro-diverse wealthy,
compassionate verbal
and nonverbal CommunioNation?

Is this a loving
caring
kind vote
for healthy neurosystemic relationships
to win/win grow,
to continue to feed sacred enlightenment
and breed consensexual
passion/pleasure
Left/Right
bicamerally intelligent empowerment?

Which is maybe
what my dour Sabbath Teacher
was hoping to feed and breed
on that last class
before transparently vulnerable selection
to widen EarthTribe’s
safe
natural
beauty enlightened CommonWealth,
and deepen
neurosystemically spiritual
empowering
panentheistic health

Well sung
and wellness danced,
liberally enlightened
and conservatively empowered,
left and win/win right
into my Jesus-informed
trauma-free voting booth.

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Orthodox v Orthopraxis

Yogi Berra said:
In theory there is no difference from practice.
In practice, there is

Applying this to communication theory:
In nonviolence theory
there is no difference from practice
of win/win compassion.
Yet, in Business as Win/Lose Usual
Patriarchal political monoculturing practice
and Capital monopolistic economic intent
there are no virtues calculated for compassionate communication,
for merciful creolizing political views,
and restorative forgiveness
for matricidal sins
of our StraightWhite Patriarchs

Ignorant about healthy polycultural,
resilient
therapeutic integral relationships
in response to systemic trauma.

Nonviolent communication orthodoxy
enlightens everything
but nothing positive win/win prevails.
Compassion’s transparent and vulnerable win/win practice
unveils every positive relationship
becoming co-empowered
but no one person knows why.

In our EarthRestorative lab,
nonviolent verbal theory
and compassionate nonverbal practice
are bicamerally combined:
nothing win/lose prevails
and every resilient relationship
compassionately feels why
0-sum theoretical assumptions
do not comply
with Earth’s Whole Open Systemic
virtuously therapeutic practice
of avoiding viciously competitive theories.

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Speaking From Felt Experience

Enjoying Earth’s promised land
of compassionate
multicultural communion,
we share a preference for deep
rich soil
and fertile green-blue
resonating surf

As our bodies adjust
to rocky and prickly
either me
or not me space

And our minds flow
back and forth
through gooey both “me”
and organic neurosensory “we”
peace searching times
of glad/bad memory,
healthy peak and unwealthy valley
remembering felt body trauma
and mindfully resilient therapies

Inhaling Earth’s past sacred unions
Exhaling into conjoined future
compassionate communion.

These reflections came to mind
this morning
as I recalled a recent clergy question:

“What did you FEEL
when you first read
this proposal for a change
in our corporate
orthodox
Universal Salvific
and Unitarian CoRedemptive
liberated feminist tradition.”

I remember listening for neuro-sensexually
enlightened language
for distinguishing core
empowered/disempowered Feelings
primally limited to:

Glad-anticipating win/win peak mind/body experiences
Bad-anxious about lose/lose dualdark valley experiences
Sad-depressed about my own win/lose long-term chances
Mad-about suppressed short-term survival
odds against overpowering PatriarchalGod’s
timeless dispassion.

My gladness trying to thrive
despite an unholy trinity
responding to trauma history
of multigenerational peak/valley surfing
change

Transitions
in glad health opportunities
reforming bad unease
sad disease
mad missing ease
invoking dissociative
neuro-sensexual despair
informing future opportunities
for compassionate repair.

Out of twenty
LeftBrain verbal dominant responses
to this spirited natural feelings question,
only two mentioned feelings
underlying
predicting positive
and negative
and ambivalent thoughts.

One said both glad about opportunity
for deep communal dialogue
and sad about lowly lay victims
speaking against too powerful and unenlightened
religious professional orchestrations

Us v them rhetoric
creating a polarizing culture
of win/lose
0-sum
closed-off
competitive
destabilizing trauma

Lack of EarthPeace
and Restorative Justice
in the deep rich soil
and fertile green-blue surf
of nature-spirited communion
opportunities for peak dialogical experiences
of LeftMind/RightBody
enlightened/empowering
FatherSun/MotherEarth co-passionate
revival.

Another wise woman elder responded
with “confused”
which encompasses,
without resonantly resolving,
all of Glad and Bad
Sad and Mad
chaotic flowing mind
feeling toxically disembodied
from sacred healing peace
restoring EarthTribe Justice
co-passionate mission statements
EarthTribe healing vocations.

What no one said
was “compassion”
for the romantic-comedy of peak experienced Glad
and the traumatic-tragedy of dark valley experienced
Bad’s
short-term Mad
and long-term chronic Sad
Lose/Lose absence
of healthy
enlightened
messianic minds

Surfing through empowered
co-redemptive neurosensory
bodhisattva bodies
of spiritual/natural
mental/physical
co-passionate communicators

Win/win naturally resilient
co-mediating spiritual practicers
rooted in peak experiences
of comprehensive synergetic feelings
more resiliently Glad
than dispassionately Bad

Speaking our restorative justice
free and co-responsive win/win
searching truths
to patriarchal/capitalist
win/lose systemic trauma.

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Messiahs and Bodhisattvas

What do top and bottom
above and below
leader and follower
day and night
mountain and valley
up and down
above and below
high and low
pole and hole
convex and concave
vertex and vortex
frontsides and backsides
dominant and recessive
north and south
colonizing and creolizing
without and within
transcendent and indigenous
crown and root
sperm and egg
knowledge and wisdom
thought and feeling
mind and body
orthodoxy and orthopraxis
light and power
enlightenment and empowerment
exegesis and eisegesis
capital and corporal
SunFather and EarthMother
salvation and co-redemption
justice and peace
orchestration and co-mediation
accountability and co-responsibility
investment and infestment
co-arising and co-gravitating
have to do with
causing health-loving Egos
and effecting wealth-living EcoSystems?

Asked his
MonoTheistic Yangiversal
messianic thoughts
of her
PanenTheistic Yinatarian
bodhisattva feelings.

Not sure,
s/he replies,
Perhaps messiahs sing
while bodhisattvas dance?

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ReCentering Domestic NonViolence

This brisk, sunny March morning, I return from delivering my son to his adult daycare van.

Upon opening The Norwich Times, I delight to read the new Center for Safe Futures “will be taking a huge step forward in how well we can serve the growing number of our neighbors who need help with domestic violence…”

After reading the article, I am delighted about this significant half-step toward a more integrated and holistic service structure to improve safety and well-being outcomes for victims and survivors of violence, assault, stalking, physical and verbal hate-crime abuse, black-market sale pricing for using powerless and unheard and unseen and uncared for human bodies commodified to provide third party capital profits, and other disturbing forms of predative trauma.

Violently polarizing drama threatens trust in neighborhood-felt survival, and our civil, compassionate community thrival, every time we hear, and, god forbid, exhaustively watch depressing, national history-making news brought to us by our uncivil, wounded and wounding retributive criminal justice systems; uncaring, unhealthy, and certainly not holistic empowerment systems for nonviolent reconciliation.

My colleagues on the Norwich Youth, Family, and Recreation Advisory Board have become used to my eagerness to celebrate half-steps toward win/win strategic restorative peace while simultaneously sternly reconsidering our missing nonviolent communication step away from retributive win/lose justice systems. World wide webs pitching prey against predator, cultivating my despair about polarizing dissociative drama rooted in divisive demonizing trauma systems that do not empower resilient health and safely resonant domestic wealth.

Down near the bottom of the first front-page column I read, “Service providers and community partners will work together to break the [systemic trauma] cycle of violence and abuse.” Wow! Now this is an unexpected good news mission statement!

On second thought, it does echo messianic scriptured messages about the Christian Prince of Peace’s salvific mission, and that, so far, feels like an aging, poor in spirit, and increasingly despairing half-empty step toward downsizing EarthJustice expectations for global nonviolent peace and justice.

In my wild decaffeinated morning meditations, this eagerly anticipated aspiration, to break the win/lose bonds of systemic trauma, reminds me of a huge covenant change proposed for discussion at All Souls UU, in New London.

“We covenant to dismantle racism and all forms of systemic oppression.” I wonder how we would practice such powerful “Beloved Community” passion. How could our faith communities help break the vicious cycle of violence, abuse, and emotional neglect fueling neurosystemic trauma?

Perhaps Restorative Justice and Peace Reconciliation practices of nonviolent communication could empower transparent and vulnerable dialogue between defendants and predators, so often brought together and stuck together by addictive codependence–which feels safer, and economically healthier than aching loneliness, emptiness, hopelessness, despair of punishment, shame, blame, Othering judgments that we do not merit unconditional warm regard.

My own therapeutic feelings of hope, informed by Multicultural Community Mediation, focusses on safer and healthier and emotionally wealthier compassionate relationships. Empowering intention and win/win designed retention I cannot find in this article. It misses a redemptive half-step that could prophetically declare we will not tolerate the “vengeance is mine” heresy that perpetuates future victimization. Excommunication brought to us by judicial and police systems inciting weaponized trauma among those voted least likely to succeed by disassociated peers.

Is it reasonable to hope this Center for Safe Futures, and all the best intervention and prevention practices advertised by an expanding Family Justice Center model may be fully baptized in the peace-making waters of Restorative Justice?

Will domestically healthy and safe mission statements survive the ribbon cutting to become resiliently saved from past systemic trauma sins of our Straight White Patriarchal fathers?

I guess I’m still waiting, as my acidic coffee stomach turns cold with impatient curiosity, for some other brilliantly brighter good news front-page article announcing the multiculturally grand virtues of neurosystemic trauma-informed therapeutic projects to ReCenter Healthy Bodies and Safe Mind Wellness Futures.

Compassionate futures that restore virtuous communion circles of therapeutic repair–and not viciously retributive, accountability trauma hierarchies continuing to promise more efficiently enlightened from-above services, still half-stepping toward managing a universally disunitarian pandemic of dissociative despair.

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Weapons of Trauma Defense

When personal narcissism
and tribal autism
choose our words
as hurting
threatening
weapons of trauma defense

Rather than choosing wealth
of healing tools
for compassion’s therapeutic unfence

We soon find
that no one cares
to impatiently listen
outside our partisan walls

For whatever future win/win kindness
and EarthCare forgiveness
we cannot trust
will last.

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Religion and Other Strange Passions

Religions,
and other strange passions
exotic
and erotic
and hypnotic,
are at their healthiest natural
and safe wealthiest spiritual
best

Reconnecting compassion
between yesterday’s remembered
conservational enlightenment
and tomorrow’s anticipated
liberating empowerment
restoring EarthPeace healthy wealth.

A peak spiritually experienced Warrior
dances.

A peak nature experiencing Muse
sings
of sensexual joy
in colorful
and fragrant play
thrival

Conserving cautionary work
for anthroprivileged survival
with birds
and frogs
and insects
and other mammals
giving peaceful voice
to health resonant choice
to mind/body rejoice.

A peak nature spirited Sage
sings while dancing
and thinking about reconnecting

All these thoughtful feelings
with healthy timeless resonance
and pathological
closed down dissonance

And wisdom
to resiliently search
for inside cooperatively
co-invested outside

Nature’s sacred compassions
at their healthiest
and best sacred Muse wealthiest
reconnecting Warriors

Dancing
between yesterday’s inhaled enlightenment
exhaling tomorrow’s singing
dancing
healing
restoring Earth’s organic
orgasmic empowerment.

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The Senior City Center

When I entered the City Senior Center
with my Open Mic proposal
to increase resilience
and decrease apartheid dissonance

I could hear no music,
see no dancing.

The quilting room
and the game room,
even the pool tables,
were as quiet as the library,
which at least held four contemplative people
scattered in their own secluded spaces.

Like visiting a sad monastery,
without tai chi,
chi gong,
walking meditation,
and/or yoga classes
filled with abundant creaky grace.

Back then
The Senior Center felt like a sad retirement home,
day care for some,
a reprieve from unmitigated loneliness
away from an empty nest,
a dusty divorce,
tiring widow weeds,
snarky dark separations,
untimely and unwanted departures.

A place to avoid risks
of dying unhappily
in sequestered
marginalized 24/7 isolation

More anxious now
than anticipating
long weekday evenings
dark nights
and bleak winter weekends

Where no outside kindness
for aching bones
and sinus cavities
could be found
in one’s private old age tomb.

Fading
failing
irrelevant
uncherished rooms feel frightening,
sometimes angry
waiting to die stations
for prisoners of neglect

Victims of systemic trauma
aging alone
in a retiring
and not repurposing
silent place.

Now returning,
as we cooperatively rebuild
our Senior Wisdom Center,
former inmates remember ourselves
as guilty criminals,
blaming and shaming
and judging our sins
of lacking compassion

Throwing our humbled lot
in with all those Otherers
accused of Earth Matricide

Smothering our organic Center
with extractive plunder

Abortion of our regenerative Planet,
HOME plant
exploited for anthroprivileged
economic
and short-term apartisan gain.

I couldn’t feel
much active hope
for multi-regenerative communion

For sacred transmutation
of bad
and mad
and sad
becoming win/win cooperatively owned
and managed
root systemic glad

Back before we became a Senior Wisdom Center
conjoined with the City Arts Center
exploring neighborhood after-school and weekend
Open Mic
and Community SingAlong Dances
and Flash Mob WellBeing Engagement events.

This switch
from segregated Senior Center
and unhoused lack of any Youth Center
to Senior Wisdom Center
supporting neighborhood MusEcology Skill Centers

Began with cooperatively engaging
healthy CrownChakra songs
while dancing wealthy RootChakra
cooperatively co-invested rhythms

Dipolar co-arising mind/body patterns,
win/win indigenous governance systems
more friendly to universal health care minds
seeking resonant opportunities
through unitarian wealth care bodies
drawn away from risky win/lose trauma
repurposing toward resilient win/win
co-passionate engagement.

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