If to be
is to communicate
Perhaps
to be healthy
is to communicate
with deep listening
and nonviolent speaking
regenerative integrity.
Both secular and sacred
natural and spiritual
scientific and inter-religious
universal truths and unitarian trust
Faithful to mind and loving with body
ego and ecosystemic
rational-compassionate
Either/Or-Both/And
bicameral
bipartisan
Taoist
NonDualist
Not-Not Zeroist
strength/flow
space/time balance.
That first black and white
grainy
strangely fluid
floating
flat screen view
of the early developing individual
inside EarthMother’s womb
Reminds me
of that first
full-spectrum green and blue
strangely white cloudy
moistly floating
slowly revolving
flat screen view
of home planet
still developing
evolving
revolving Earth.
A LeftBrain dominant individual worldview
from a RightBrain bilaterally individuating
Self/Mother
Home/Other
co-arising contextual perspective.
I find it difficult
to see these embryonic becomings
as if emerging from
monotheistic v panentheistic
ego-transcendent v ecosystemic immanent
imminent
degeneratively emergent
anxious Original Sin.
Original corruption,
degeneratively mortal design
implies our Creator,
our recreative natural/spiritual processes,
our Yangish MonoGod,
our Yintegral PanEntheistic regenerativity,
Made an anthropomorphic
inhumane
unloving
win v lose
zero-sum calculated mistake
Original Sin
concludes that humane spirituality
is dualistically severed
from divinity’s naturally regenerative
integral
organic
synergetically co-relational
win/win potential
before any umbilical cord
is surgically severed.
This, in turn,
confuses a LeftBrain dominant
either true or false
way of competitively adding v subtracting
win/win multiplying nonviolent regenerative health
for both mother and child,
Earth and her EarthTribes
Back before white privileged
LeftBrain dominant males
disproportionately developed English,
Further back
before linguistic empowered language
evolved from economically enlightened
numeric quantification
scale
organic rhythm
syncretic nurturing pace
integral sacred felt space
curiously intrigued
emergent win/win
co-relational
metric
fractal DNA patterns
of co-attaching
healthy co-investments
Infant organic neurosystems already knew
Earth’s bilateral inspiring intelligence
was troubled
when the following were no longer nondualistically sensed
as self-referencing
regenerative
integral
synonymous win/win experiences:
life as love
resilience supporting resonance
nature outsiding inside spirit
body-mind
EgoBaby/EarthSystemicMother
Passionate compassion
humane-divine
secular-sacred
ego-ecosystem
autonomy of interdependence
oneness of zero
linearity of spiraling circles
fullness of empty
Historic Culture
justice of peace
equity of integrity
Health optimizing wealth
Me of We
individual relationship
colonizing creolization
competitive cooperation
Either/Or reconsidering Both/And
linear bipolarity co-arising circular dipolarity
Prescriptive Thoughts emerging from descriptive Feelings
cognition of intuition
perceiving EarthTribe receiving
secular space throughout sacred time
Imagining my journey
since my first black and white
prematurely grey grainy
strangely fluid
floating
flat screen worldview
of ego-home planet
still developing
evolving
revolving
health wealthing
sacred
full-spectrum
spiraling MotherEarth.
Overly familiar with her defiance
patterns of fetal alcohol confusion,
neuro-systemic habits of resistance,
I, the consummate ecofeminist,
was sure my daughter felt
I was shutting wounded Ivy out
when she wanted me
to enter her toxic on-line
stream of Sponge Bob consciousness
When she came to me,
in self-care mode,
while I was meditating
reading
reflecting
writing
breathing deeply in,
then out
One gasp for hope
at a new pandemic time,
searching for one hour
without unmitigated despair
at this unhealthy contagion time,
one calming day at a time,
one therapeutic glimpse at a week,
one unimaginable month,
one lifetime of a year,
One retiring stage,
one quickly ancient life,
one emerging seamless love
at this time.
In exasperation
with her insistent interruption
in my sacred space,
I exclaimed
“Ivy, I can’t take care of you
if you won’t let me
take care of me!”
To which she replied,
“Can I sit here
quietly
next to you?”
I was skeptical,
cynical about cooperative deep breathing
with screaming screen-time Ivy,
but “You may,
if you can”
And so she did
sit next to me
at the head of my bed
where her paraplegic brother slept
post-seizure,
She leaned her black curled head
against my old white man shoulder
peacefully
breathing side by side
And that is how
we resiliently entered
into this passing
evolving
rising and falling,
erupting and disrupting pandemic
of Earth’s green
and sacred
virally emergent
health care.
Integrity can feel overwhelming
when compared to underwhelming
disintegration
Nascent powers of joyful integrity
have emerged perhaps too late in life,
which feels sad,
at best bitterly happy
to take so long
to move from wounded child
into integral binomials
Like thinking universally
feels unitarian,
and global consciousness
grows interdependently intersectional
and even inter-religious,
and ecosystemic health
feeds polycultural joy
breeds polypathic integrity
Synergetic as win/win transpartisan
co-empathically felt
thoughts anticipating co-operative
happy dialogue
While economic co-investments
joyfully contribute
to shared green/blue
spiraling
revolving
revolutionary political co-passions
In-between
reconnecting
religioning theological
regenerating ecological win/lose
wounded children
and win/win
joyfully healthy
quietly smiling elders
Feeling sensually sinful
thinking neuro-sensory soulful
silently smirking
sainted biosystems.
Where all humane souls repent
of contempt
for our EgoSelf
against our EcoOthers
And celebrate,
or at least commend,
express gratitude for,
our inner enlightened
and empowered
co-passionate communication,
dialogue,
discernment
Bilaterally
and multiculturally informed
by
of
and for
global climate health
and polycultural wealth
of peace.
Rituals
are sacred
when they reconnect
what LeftBrain dominant
straight white privileged man
has transcendently and monotheistically disconnected
Earthly nature
divorced from Heavenly spirit,
power
from light,
empowerment
from enlightenment,
autonomous theological identity
from interdependent ecological experience,
personal health
from transcendent joy
Like segregating
sexual health rituals
from sensory wealth of regenerative spirituals
sacredly enriching both Yang LiberalLovers
and more mundanely conserving
Yintegral every day
red-blooded green conservation
PolyCultural rituals
of resonant positive is not negative,
resilient health is not pathological
cancerous wealth
Lives fulfilling YangYin in-between
balancing rituals
reforming divinely sacred empowerment
and profane ecosystemic
enlightened health/wealth
co-passionate care
Rituals,
sexual and sacred
are ultra-nonviolent
celebrating EarthMother’s sacred
holy
holonic non-zero zen womb
of Yintegrity double-binary
ProGenitive balance
with Yangish LeftBrain
patriarchal EitherTop/OrBottom
conservative reaction
to protect healthy/safe conserving EarthTribe
through co-empathic therapeutic wounds
of historic win/lose zero-sum thinking
Unaware of positive
socio-eco-psycho-bio-theological flow
panentheistically co-operative
intersectionally co-invested
dipolar co-arising
bipartisan Left/Right
PolyPathic = Not(NotPolyVagal)
P=N(NP) strategic win/win
ritualistic systems
for resilient/resonant
global peace outcomes
Rituals
both naturally enlightened
and spiritually empowering
for health/wealthy EarthTribe,
cooperatively DNA-enscripted
organic mindbodies
formed and reformed
by co-passionate neuro-sensory systems
Seeking pleasing
pleasure rituals,
like making slow-grown
universally uniting love.
It seems unlikely
Left Hemisphere’s
Either 100% Positive-On
Or 0% Negative-Dormant circuitry
Could change
toward polypolarizing
Right Hemisphere’s
Both Full
And NonZero Empty
CoPassion
And Silent Soul feelings
Devoid of unilaterally dissonant monoculturalism,
monotheistic judging voices,
depressing anthro-supremacism,
predicating overwhelming chaos,
underwhelming complexity
of unnatural lose-Me/lose-We despair
for fading
formerly healthy memories
of ecosystemic robust climates
For our already wounded children
and their affective climates
of high lose/lose risk
negatively correlated
with fading win/win opportunities
to rediscover
great Green EcoFeminist healthcare
For our future poly/mono-cultural
health of LeftHemisphere rational
verbal appreciation
For RightHemisphere wealth
of green eco-systemic
regenerative
resilient body-health/mind-wealth
strong/flowing
mountain/valley
convex-ego/concave-ecology
Ritualizing sacred green redeemers
Prophets of holy panentheistic
regenerative healthcare
Composed of dynamic spiraling revolutions,
emerging systems
remembering lunar ecocycles
of LeftHemisphere enlightenment,
RightHemisphere both/and co-empathic
passionate wisdom,
dipolar co-arising light/dark
Reweaving health/wealth
ReConnecting co-empathic evolutionals
like Yang/Yin
liberal love/conservational mental yintegrity
co-investing Left/Right
in Green poly-systemic health
resilience of hidden appositionals
in co-operating co-passion
BiPolar sexual orientations
including dipolar co-arising transcendent Saints
AND TransPanTheistic seductive Sinners
Straight poles
and transgender holes,
tops and bottoms,
aboves and belows,
co-enlightnment and affective wise empowerment
together seeking blue/green global climates
of health-caring balance
In a NonZero systemic zone
Open to secular holistic
AND sacred panentheistic understandings
overwhelming global
bi-hemispheric
health/wealth care
both Eco/Theo-Logical
ReWeaving
ReConnecting
ReGenerating similarities
in double-negative equals positive balancing
win/win optimizing
resilient global healthcare
openness,
open wounded nest
That positive Polynomial (P) worldviews
LeftHemisphere dominant
are also
negative NotPolynomial (NP)
views of RightHemisphere
win/win healthy v lose/lose pathological
heuristic both/and theoretical experience
DiPolar co-arising
liberal Yang lovers
and conservational-integral
GreenBeauty ecofeminist
global healthcare
eco/theo-logically
enlightened/empowered
To inter-religiously interconnect
multicultural values for health
with our polycultural STEAM experience
of resilient green ecosystemic
resilient
global
Open Systemic
holistically healthy-wealth
ReWeaving
ReConnecting
ReGenerating
mountains/valleys
convex/concave
complex/chaotic
holistic/empty narcissistic ZeroZone
for EarthTribe’s global wealthshare
equivalently balancing
green/blue healthcare
ReConnecting
ReWeaving
interdependent red-blooded
USA patriotism
for Green MotherEarth,
reconnecting
reweaving
sweet
sacred Home.
The often unnoticed first strategic step
in bullying
is to isolate.
Religious
political
economic
and/or sexual bullying
begins, already,
feeling entitled to pervasively disempower,
dissociate,
disinvest,
unenlighten,
excommunicate,
lock up,
terminate from employment,
send to the reservation,
asylum
ghetto,
wrong side
of the LeftBrain dominant
self-righteous tracks.
Deeply separate,
divide and, thereby, expose
and bully
that Other,
or those Others,
who need to learn their place,
separate and deservedly unequal,
to relearn their divinely-inspired space
of oppression
neglect
punishment
For being wrong,
too needy greedy,
too ignorant,
uneducated
simple
quiet and sneaky
queer
unbinary
effeminate
pretentious
hypocritical
weird looking, sounding, smelling,
frightening
angry
threatening…
Such alien Others
are first isolated
at least by disreputation,
then abused
First neglected
shunned
Othered
alienated
unaccepted,
Then ridiculed
used
raped
vilified
Blatantly and falsely accused
of being motivated
to dismiss
and impoverish
the monoculturing Bullies
through stealth
or by speaking their lying,
biased
self-serving Truth
Which is always ignored
until They get too uppity
again.
Bullies
and their Victims
are, thereby, deprived
of experiencing compassionate
cooperatively appreciated
and co-invested
dialogue.
Bullies
and their Victims
thereby declare and suffer wars
where everyone,
including plants and animals,
soil and water and air quality,
suffers and loses
except, in the bookkeeping department,
the military-industrial
short-term corporate profit Bullies
Who will not realize
their self-victimizing
long-term health and safety losses
until degeneratively isolated
from all prospects for a livable
sustainable
humane
sacredly compassionate
EarthTribe health and safety
future climate.
Am I unhealthy and unsafe oppressed,
suppressed,
repressed,
depressed?
Not really all that:
competitively impressive,
first through last impression
newsworthy,
enticingly marketable,
profitably commercial,
slickly corporate,
predatively intelligent
More camouflaged
unnoticed and undefined
unrefined
and, frankly, perhaps unstable
because of my environmental circumstances?
as liberal lovers
would have failing to ego-thrive anthrosupremacists
monoculturally privileged
and multiculturally misunderstood
underprivileged
shunned
and Othered
And/Or
Am I health/safety oppressed
because of my personal
bad ecopolitical choices?
like having unprotected sex
instead of going to the mall,
Not really reflecting on
wider and deeper context
like True Faith
and Healthy Happiness
monotheistically delivered
monopolistically endowed
StraightWhiteMale privileged
monoculturing LeftBrain transcendent
AnthroDivine judgment
falling shy
of unconditional regard
As win/lose divinely inspired Capital investments
support PatriarchalGod’s purely patriotic hierarchy
not-so-blindly selecting
who deserves Restorative Win/Win Justice
second
and third
and fourth chances
And who should not
escape Lose/Lose Retributive Dissociation
(repression, suppression, oppression, depression)
A social sympathy so thinly simpering
judicial powers are too comfortably scampering
to throw away personal freedom keys
with polarized dispassionate Disdain
Icing on Earth’s soggy cake
for feeding climate rabid
polarizing
angry
traumatized
lose/lose anthro-victims,
producers and consumers of Othering.
To get out from under-cussed non-classedness,
must I truly choose
between circumstantial ecological Voices
for resonant healthcare,
Or personal theological-felt internal Choices
for resilient wealthshare?
Do natural
polycultural healthcare systems
not co-arise
egowealthy green EarthPeace
spiritual co-investments?
So yes,
I guess,
answers to my oppressed prayers
by our liberal lover circumstances
and my conservational personal
integrating/desecrating
either Saint
or Sinner Choices
Do LeftBrain ignore
Both systemic conserving circumstances
And internal liberating intuitions
RightBrain questioning
interdependently unrecognized
NonVoices.
For tonight
celebrating 163 birthdays
among the three of me,
my husband,
and oldest son’s May birthdays
within four days of each other
For tonight
unestranged,
and, if we each prefer,
for the remainder of our lives
more together,
less apart
We are here to understand
and express appreciation
for and with each other,
not to fix anyone’s misunderstandings
or positions
or perspective
or ignorance
or sin
against God
or Country
or common sense,
or love for each other,
or all of the above.
That way,
if we get confused
about which of these
White God
Red v Blue country
or common sense
Pillars of economic and political wisdom
we have so shamefully violated,
It doesn’t matter
because we’re not going to try
to understand Othering tonight
And, if you prefer,
for the remainder of our co-invested lives
more together,
less apart.
If you want feedback
about Past or Future You,
please ask
Because, for tonight,
we are here together
to hear how you are feeling now
about appreciating abundant you
as you are
And about appreciating us
as we are
And any memories of our past
we can revisit
with full integrity
appreciating you
as part of us–
your Me
as our interwoven We.
So, if you want feedback
about how and what you are doing
and not doing,
about who you are becoming
or not becoming,
you will have to ask.
If you get feedback
you cannot appreciate,
at least as yet,
Please, let’s help remind each other,
calmly and kindly,
that giving unsolicited feedback,
including how to solve your stupid problems
for you,
violates our rules for tonight
and, if you prefer,
for the remainder of our lives,
more together,
less apart.
These rules apply to you,
about yourself,
and about us,
and include me,
about me,
and about us.
I invite your kind
and calm reminder,
and my own
this night to appreciate
and celebrate who I am
as I am
and who you are
as we are
compassionately co-invested
Without judging ourselves
or Others
Without shaming ourselves
or blaming Others
for what we have failed to understand
and to express co-passionately,
To water our flowers
and rewarm our best days,
and not feed the cold dead weeds
of our worst days
before this our night
more together,
less apart.
gdill52 