Uncategorized

ReCentering Domestic NonViolence

This brisk, sunny March morning, I return from delivering my son to his adult daycare van.

Upon opening The Norwich Times, I delight to read the new Center for Safe Futures “will be taking a huge step forward in how well we can serve the growing number of our neighbors who need help with domestic violenceā€¦”

After reading the article, I am delighted about this significant half-step toward a more integrated and holistic service structure to improve safety and well-being outcomes for victims and survivors of violence, assault, stalking, physical and verbal hate-crime abuse, black-market sale pricing for using powerless and unheard and unseen and uncared for human bodies commodified to provide third party capital profits, and other disturbing forms of predative trauma.

Violently polarizing drama threatens trust in neighborhood-felt survival, and our civil, compassionate community thrival, every time we hear, and, god forbid, exhaustively watch depressing, national history-making news brought to us by our uncivil, wounded and wounding retributive criminal justice systems; uncaring, unhealthy, and certainly not holistic empowerment systems for nonviolent reconciliation.

My colleagues on the Norwich Youth, Family, and Recreation Advisory Board have become used to my eagerness to celebrate half-steps toward win/win strategic restorative peace while simultaneously sternly reconsidering our missing nonviolent communication step away from retributive win/lose justice systems. World wide webs pitching prey against predator, cultivating my despair about polarizing dissociative drama rooted in divisive demonizing trauma systems that do not empower resilient health and safely resonant domestic wealth.

Down near the bottom of the first front-page column I read, “Service providers and community partners will work together to break the [systemic trauma] cycle of violence and abuse.” Wow! Now this is an unexpected good news mission statement!

On second thought, it does echo messianic scriptured messages about the Christian Prince of Peace’s salvific mission, and that, so far, feels like an aging, poor in spirit, and increasingly despairing half-empty step toward downsizing EarthJustice expectations for global nonviolent peace and justice.

In my wild decaffeinated morning meditations, this eagerly anticipated aspiration, to break the win/lose bonds of systemic trauma, reminds me of a huge covenant change proposed for discussion at All Souls UU, in New London.

“We covenant to dismantle racism and all forms of systemic oppression.” I wonder how we would practice such powerful “Beloved Community” passion. How could our faith communities help break the vicious cycle of violence, abuse, and emotional neglect fueling neurosystemic trauma?

Perhaps Restorative Justice and Peace Reconciliation practices of nonviolent communication could empower transparent and vulnerable dialogue between defendants and predators, so often brought together and stuck together by addictive codependence–which feels safer, and economically healthier than aching loneliness, emptiness, hopelessness, despair of punishment, shame, blame, Othering judgments that we do not merit unconditional warm regard.

My own therapeutic feelings of hope, informed by Multicultural Community Mediation, focusses on safer and healthier and emotionally wealthier compassionate relationships. Empowering intention and win/win designed retention I cannot find in this article. It misses a redemptive half-step that could prophetically declare we will not tolerate the “vengeance is mine” heresy that perpetuates future victimization. Excommunication brought to us by judicial and police systems inciting weaponized trauma among those voted least likely to succeed by disassociated peers.

Is it reasonable to hope this Center for Safe Futures, and all the best intervention and prevention practices advertised by an expanding Family Justice Center model may be fully baptized in the peace-making waters of Restorative Justice?

Will domestically healthy and safe mission statements survive the ribbon cutting to become resiliently saved from past systemic trauma sins of our Straight White Patriarchal fathers?

I guess I’m still waiting, as my acidic coffee stomach turns cold with impatient curiosity, for some other brilliantly brighter good news front-page article announcing the multiculturally grand virtues of neurosystemic trauma-informed therapeutic projects to ReCenter Healthy Bodies and Safe Mind Wellness Futures.

Compassionate futures that restore virtuous communion circles of therapeutic repair–and not viciously retributive, accountability trauma hierarchies continuing to promise more efficiently enlightened from-above services, still half-stepping toward managing a universally disunitarian pandemic of dissociative despair.

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Uncategorized

Funeral For A BiPolar Alien

Friends,
Trumpians,
EcoFeminists

We gather here
to no longer hear divisions
across a win/lose
zero-sum aisle
so we can see revisions
within a win/win
nonzero-exponential
future free of buried guile.

Green flowing fullness
no longer mourned
for lost love of deep polytheistic
polyculturing wealth
buried in deep
indigenous
metaphoric meaning

RedBlooded LeftBrain anthro-alien exceptionalism
may open whole resurrection systems
to universal anthro-healing skillsets
widely re-educating
re-birthing
re-incarnating analogical
ecological
theological shared purposes

For getting,
and not forgetting to get,
out of bed healthy
and potentially happy
win/win optimistic

Even on this cold
wet grey Monday morning
buried inside claustrophobic
windowless
closed door
meet and meet
and greet and regreet
and regreet meetings
curiously scheduled
and rescheduled
and unscheduled
and overscheduled burials
of hidden win/lose agendas

Continuing sacred graveside
all afternoon
on into early dusk
late life
of peace returning
eventide outside

Benediction
for formerly divided
green ecofeminist aliens
and our redblooded
health happy wealth
of inside/outside allies.

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Uncategorized

To A Superior Judge

I could not do what you are mandated to do
every day on society’s justice bench,
weighing retributive justice
against restorative healing.

I cannot look at police
and correction officers’
routinely criminalizing vocations,
and injudicious levying of fines
against the young
and black
and brown
and homeless

Punishing prison sentences
for the most obvious trauma victims
of chronic blue-shirt bullying,
theft,
not really clever lies,
racial profiling,
diminishment
and derision by militarized
and miseducated
mercenaries of a rabid Estate.

My son,
now twenty-seven,
was not expected to reach full emotional maturity
until his early thirties,
as evinced by research on ADHD.

However,
that pessimistic projection
may be optimistically skewed,
not accounting for trauma histories
common to significant learning disabilities,
nor a special education black male experience
in a racist and homophobic “corrections” society.

Economic and political maturity
security
integrity
may never arrive at the Promised Land
for the young black male
separated from his birthmother during infancy
to be parented by a mixed-race gay male couple,
having to defend not only himself
but his out gay younger brother
from predative peers
under the radar
of teachers
and school administrators
disabled by “zero tolerance”
means zero compassion
retributive justice
dysfunctional trauma systems.

This is the third time that police officers have failed
to include in their self-righteous reports
that they took hundreds of dollars out of my son’s pocket
and put it in theirs,
and triumphantly reported only a fraction
of the high quality,
organic cannabis found in his car,
while the majority disappeared

Not reported,
not seen,
not returned;
stolen from my young
black
homeless,
high school diploma with a fourth-grade education,
son.

If my oldest son could easily choose to work
at a full-time
living wage job

If he could get to work on time,
on the right remembered schedule,
with a reliable car,
and feel like he was not being judged,
ridiculed,
and bullied by peers
and supervisors,
shamed and blamed for not being smart enough,
clever enough,
quick-witted enough,
middle-class white enough,
man enough,
successful enough,
then he would not choose to spend long hours
and sleepless nights
delivering the only therapeutic self-medication to others
that has helped him numb the pain
of childhood,
community,
chronic post-traumatic stressors
which have led to his current social,
economic,
and political ostracization,
and potential imprisonment.

I am a certified multicultural community mediator,
so my training is about how to most effectively support
those experiencing trauma
and actively looking for restorative peace
and resilient social justice
therapeutic outcomes.

Mediators begin with identifying the victim(s) feelings
safety needs
and healthy wants,
and then explore the probability
that perpetrators too are victims
of childhood,
community,
and environmental
trauma histories,
fraught with
win/lose zero-sum
contextual stress
critical and chronic
non win/win events.

From that lose/lose potential perspective,
my son has been repeatedly victimized
by police officers
defensively trained
to tolerate their own predative
bullying behaviors.

If anyone would benefit from jail time,
and/or fines,
it is the perpetrators of organized,
anti-social crime.

But, again,
from a restorative justice perspective,
blue-shirt officers, too,
have been victimized by a militarized,
miseducated retributive justice system,
rooted in judgment,
blame,
and shame

And not compassion,
curiosity,
and contextual intelligence

Which is why I could not do
what you are mandated to do.

With unconditional regard,

GD, MDiv, MPA,
and heartbroken DD’s Dad

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Uncategorized

Straight White Privileged Silence

Listen to sterile silence
nursing homebound fans
wavering white noiselessness
of silent futile passing

Absence of passion
hope
care
happiness
or creased
and reasoned sadness.

Hear this void of madness,
lack of hunger
or parched thirst
for conversation
splendid nutrition
scandalous emission
empowering immigration
enlightened emigration
or angry fear emanation
of forced solitude migration

Into mortal loss
of sensory reception
political deception
economic perception
theistic inception
septic conception.

Smell nothing.
Taste everything
becomes dust
delustered rust
lust for transcendent
disembodied consummation
omnipresent transportation
omniscient evaporation
full latitude
for fragrance-free
plastic platitudes
feckless attitudes
disdainful blows
to further fertile emanations.

Sing where nothing
settles into rounding octave rings
to never
ever want to dance
in robust spirals
again

Against depressions
felt repressions
thought impressions
known suppressions
unheard deflation
worn through integration
transcultural conflation

Of panentheistic elegant Zeroes
absorbed by a monstrous
monopolistic silent
slick One

Listening to sterile silence
nursing homebound fans,
white emptiness
of silent
restless passing.

Glare at it.
Rake it in.
Sleep with it
if you dare
to care
without an inch
or squeezed moment
to spare.

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Uncategorized

Another Love Letter

So, this is a love letter
from me
to you
for us.

Quiet Cream
and well moisturized Tan
were my first warm
and appreciative glimpse of you

Engaged listener.
Looks gay men in wounded eyes
while listening,
then speaking,
searching for
and finding acceptance,
at least for here
and now.

While both our neuro-systems ask,
with each breath inhaled,
Am I safe?
Each breath exhaled,
Is this healthy?

Or maybe,
ummmā€¦
“I’ll have to think about that.”

Not so much
as a glance my witnessing way,
Wondering,
Is he why I am here?
I hope

Would I be appropriate
to here become
for just one Other?

You were not distracted
easily
from eyes
and voices
surrounding your place
in this 44th chapter
in not patriarchal,
but truly not green ecofeminist either,
Gayla BTQ versatile,
exclusive top,
promiscuously inclusive bottom,
anonymous,
romantic-erotic,
occasionally sacredly orgasmic,
political sex health history.

I wondered
then
as now
where we could fit

In gaps of loneliness
of not being fully known,
exposed,
spiritually and naturally naked
transparent
vulnerable,
fully co-invested,
transculturally cooperative,
co-empathic
co-passionate,
quietly completing each other’s unsaid senses,
thoughts,
integrity,
warmth,
refulgent quenching wetness.

Then, that first smile
just for me.

I am lost to your white teeth,
left-sided dimple,
eyelashes heavy lidding brown-eyed welcome
despite it all

Trust in integrity’s healing potential
after considering all losses,
stressors,
past troubling relationships
in gay white male privilege.

There we were
and here we are
ongoing

Me
writing this love letter,

You
curiously waiting to hear
and see
and feel,
to touch
and be touched by,
something possibly on your way,
a lovely surprise

Because
No one writes love letters
evermore

Painlessly including
those in quiet ecstasy
for quiet Cream
and well-moisturized Tan.

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Uncategorized

Make America:

Does
Make America Great Again

Also mean
Make America Straight Again?

How about
Make America White Again?

Maybe
Make America
AntiFeminist Again?

Another possibility,
Make America
Christian Evangelical Supremacist
Again?

And,
more elaborately,
Make America
Business As Usual
Patriarchal/Capitalist
Autonomously Empowered
and Exclusively Enlightened
Again?

GREATness
is soooooooo much more
morally ambiguous
than public HEALTH
and global climate SAFEty.

I would feel so relieved
if my RedRight friends
and family
would patriotically fly
and pleasantly post
Make America Healthy Again
banners,
hats,
bumper stickers,
condoms,
masks,

And MAHA foreign
and domestic
green policy statements.

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Uncategorized

UnVoiced Questions

S/he wonders why
when we breathe in
our left sides
feel right mind dominant
when our rights inside
feel LeftBrain capital deviated,

Dysfunctional
disappointing
disharmonious
sad and lonely
dissonant
disturbed
unbalanced
uneased

Constipated
blocked
trumped

Stuck
obstructed
oppressed
suppressed
repressed
not fluently holistically impressed,

Pressured
disabled
disenabled
feminized
marginalized
enslaved
disempowered

Unenlightened
unarticulated
not understanding
not cooperatively experiencing
co-investing in questioning

Why we continue longing
for bicameral win/win engagement
of all our leisurely
peaceful
integral senses

And yet yearn
for vicarious entertainment
without discernable killing Time
guilt for giving up
on Earth health
restoring just systems

Losing out
on holistic Ego inside
Eco-outside Other
stereophonic redundancy
reiteration
remembering
reconnecting
religioning
reimagining

Feedback and forth
in-between engaging Others
entertaining Ego’s vacationing musical
sometimes vocational whimsical

Sometimes multi-sexual,
sometimes inter-religious,
sometimes eco-political,
sometimes co-invested

Yet unspoken
lyrically right spaced
and left lined
healthy mind
mined
mimed
mused questions.

S/he also wonders why
LeftBrain dominant monoculturalism,
like warring monopolies
and terrifying angry monotheism
and fear of His unfeeling monotony
and mono-monied values
sound like madness marching
in vicious politicized squares

While RightMind prominent S/He polycultures
feel polypathically polymathic
virtuous ecological recircling potential
and polyvagal music rivered
polyphonic inside shivered
energetic peace duo-potency

Not so much at war
dueling impotency.

S/he questions
If thick and robust LeftBrain engagement
could not possibly become
more stereophonically peaceful,
reiteratively co-passionate
RightMind communal,

Yet intimately at rest,
vicariously imagined
EarthCentric reality remembered
resilient

Entertainments,
vacations,
Healthy-Happy Holidays,

BiLateral questions
ego/eco-systemic communications,

ReCreative
BiCameral consciousness
of co-operating primacy
for peaceful co-relationship

S/he wonders
if her RightMind co-relational primacy
deeply listens for
and widely speaks of
his LeftBrain dominant Ego
capitalized AnthroSupremacy

When wiser win/win dialogue
degenerates
into win/lose debate
between healthy
cooperative
engaging Her not-not questions
and wealthy
competitions with HiStory
entertaining co-passionate Him
positive bicultural answers.

S/he wonders
if sometimes,
and perhaps always,
the opposite of peaceful integrity
is aggressive loneliness.

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Uncategorized

Protecting Healthy Environments

Integrity’s celebrated potential climax
lies togathering
inviting solidarity
in MeWe co-arising intersections
of nature-physical health anticipation
gracing,
not effacing,
spiritual-mental wealth perspication

Musing resonant LeftDominant voices
singing musical RightProminent choices
of and for
causally effective
sacred communion resilience

Of dialectical process
LeftHemisphere thought antithesis
co-operating RightHemisphere felt
hypostatic thesis
win/win seeking
bipartisan
bicameral
bilaterally integral synthesis

Dipolar co-arising
thought health/felt wealth
of polyvagal neuro-systemic
win/win safety
in resonant
resilient
brilliantly functioning
flow extending climax.

Synergetic revolutions
overwhelm oppressively obvious feelings
that RightWing Othering partisans
empowered,
but unenlightened,
are hopelessly desecrating corporate capitalists
commodifying cynical political economic beliefs
that will ultimately lose/lose
degeneratively
nihilistically prevail

Inducing Predative Othering partisan alliances
against public,
democratic,
and global climate,
polycultural systemic health

Actively seeking more resonant therapies
for resiliently win/win cooperative
multiculturally musing
amusing
co-passionate mental embodied health
expanding deep
sacred panentheistic wealth.

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Uncategorized

Strength We Find

Some body
wants some thing
some space
some time
some Other body’s place

Some individual
ego-incorporated
organic wealth
health systemic
mindbody wants to resonantly thrive
to resiliently survive

Some body
cannot compete with BusinessAsUsual
resolve
against trauma-induced Need feelings
with sufficient therapeutic compassion thoughts,
co-investment plans,
co-operating dialectical designs

To accept denial non-responses
to transparently
vulnerable
sacred polycultural
inter-religious
health/wealth invocations,
EarthGoddess reflective
resonant
resilient invitations
into peace
restoring EarthHealth
systemic justice.

Some body
wants what?

For what health
wealthy felt resonant reason?

Why can’t we gratefully accept
history’s tone deaf manipulations
economic oppressions,
political suppressions,
polyvagal dissonant
neurosystemic repressions,

LeftBrain overpowering
militarized
commodified weapons
of unenlightened
Great White Father
patrilinear capital competitions

Left hemisphere dominant
pedagogically verbalized
ecologically secularized
theologically desecrating
wounding
divisive monotheistic impressions.

Some body
needs to become empowered
through our shared depression
panentheistic oppressions

Further disabling already trauma compromised
lifetime resonant health
is never also pathologically dissonant
internally imploding
absence of indigenously resilient
ego/eco-systemic embodied
bilaterally resilient wisdom

Musing,
integrally fusing,
left hemisphere cognitive verbal dominance
suppressing right hemisphere interdependently
intuitively felt inside synergetic Voices

Indigenously wrestling
with sacred singing and dancing
spirit/nature
mental/physical jubilant choices

Panentheistically sacred
healthy democratic
ergodically resonant harmonic
bi-ionic co-binary
mind/body energy

Compelling Truth/Beauty
Yang/Yintegral
bilateral
binomial
bipartisan co-arising
light/power co-reinvesting
in seven regenerational
EarthHealth Muses

For humane ego-centering
divinely ecosystemic
inside wise resonant muse
spoken word resilient inside Voices

For outside sacred music
restoring healthy inter-connecting
eco/theo-logical choices

For abundantly non-oppressive
non-violent communion co-passion

Green resilient health/wealth
co-investing life
for love of natural nondualistic

Yet non-zeroistic
nonviolent Taoistic
indigenous wisdom

Of some body
wanting some thing
some sacred place
some health caring space
for expanding indigenous wisdom

Cooperatively co-governing
Yang/Yintegral
co-pedagogical
muse-elegant
integrally resonant
right brain prominent
eco/theo/egological

Some body
wants some passionate thing
some sacred space
some inspiring time
some Other inspiriting body’s
MeWe cooperatively resonant
bicamerally resilient
co-empowering music
muse
moving on
graced place.

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Uncategorized

NonDueling Conductors

A Straight
White
Elder Patriarch
came in to where I RightBrain sing
my Gay
White
EcoFeminist way

He seems to want to stay,
to overpower my say
and will to sing
our musing pray

Becauseā€¦
why?
I wonder what he feels
about me,
us,
about his own deep harmonic longing
to listen for our sung together feelings

Music therapy
composed of what we economically
and politically Trust,
wanting mutual
and actively co-invested
full singing circle harmonic Wins right now
to Win more easily tomorrow’s healthing way

And what might this PatriCapitalist feel
he does not want?
Perhaps less Win/Lose
ZeroSum power and light assumptions
actively distrusted
settling for more traumatic apartheid,
denial of interdependently woven relationship,
nature v spirit non-indigenous dualism
divorced from his own prehistoric felt experience
longing to avoid further nihilistic Lose/Lose
trauma
decay
pain
loss
degeneration.

Am I distracting
dissonant
too RightBrain gooey
for serious performance competition
with Your church choir’s
true blue bought and sold
commodified liturgical purpose?

To put on a good LeftBrain entertaining show

Rituals about cooperatively enjoying
our win/win WholeEarth health-care receiving
and resilient wealth-care giving
by conducting bicamerally harmonic potential

For healthier democracies,
more cooperatively owned EarthPartnership,
more inclusive multicultural polypaths
for universally unitarian polyphonic
constellations of integral systemic Voice

Yang yintegrally
WuWei
less Western sociopathic trauma
best forgiven through compassionate
indigenously polycultural
wellness sung and danced

Win health Voices
to Win resilient wealth Choices
for green ego/ecosystemic leadership

Con-celebrating BlueSky/GreenEarth
light and power felt
warm harmonic need
for more and better
inter-religious
intersectional
interdependently reweaving
healthy democratic communion

Which is what I need
and want to say
about how I seem to feel
when a Straight
White
Elder Patriarch
comes in to where I RightBrain sing
my Gay
White
EcoFeminist way.

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