Dark chances,
unhealthy and unsafe trauma
HiStories

Degenerating predative dogmas
not wanting to let go of ballistics
even for dawning light’s sacred promise
to grab full-immersion hold
and heal dark mythologies
lose now and again later ecologies
repeat rehearsed
inside-only voiced
dark passion narratives

Speaking out alarmed Betrayal
from those you were taught to Trust–
[it was Her job!
I have an unconditional contract
on a warm wet naturally wombed
and spiritually unwounded
birthright!

Defying Other’s Anger
about my gift-economy Hypocrisy
about my sacred Golden Rule restriction
win/win positive aspiration,
invoked by nature’s spiritual
Hippocratic Oath
to at least do no damage
losing trusted breath in
so losing full breath back out
again
and again
and repeat breathlessly again.

My own most difficult,
occasionally traumatic,
distressingly long, slow
letting go transition

Feels almost inevitably headed
for natural health-Lose
spiritual health-Lose
despair

Unless we all keep trying our best,
not just me
cleaning up your mess
to suffering servant impress

All us AnthroPrivileged victims
aware of traumatic over-populated
rabid traumatic
and pandemic health risks,
and runaway
emerging PTSD
and dementia
and suicide
and matricide
and ecocide

Make it almost impossible
to respect ourselves
yet not fear
retributive justice officers
and judges
and monolithic Yang-Jehovah

Dispensing punishments and fines
and shame
and blame
where the only obvious victim
I can see
is me.

My dark protagonist continues
to be victimized,
even now in aging memories

Every day past light
leads, at dusk,
to dark future
leads, at dawn,
to soon past light…

Yet my attachment to enlightenment
encourages me to disregard
co-arising dipolar dark empowerments
bicamerally re-associated

Yet awkwardly, sometimes
with high-risk trauma histories
monoculturally LeftBrain
EgoCentric predative Yang

AnthroPrivileged Voices
stuck on healthy and safe past orthodox
value systems
personal
and economic
and political
and separate and unequal
bi-sensory
and anti-sexual competitive dogmatic traditions

Not spiritually or naturally learning
so not wanting to let go
even for dawning light’s healthy promise
to grab resilient hold
and heal dark
post-traumatic lose/lose
zero-sum global
ecocidal winterish nightmares

Dipolar co-arising
unconditional warm sun rising
well-moisturized
copassionately co-invested day dreams
and horizontal dances,
core-chakra interpersonal win/win
exercises
nonviolent practice
practice
practice

Until we get our cooperative peak experience
sacredly awesome
and restorative ecojustice
left and right again

BiLateral
BiCameral creolization
in timeless tides
of over-swelling
regenerativity

Not quite
so bleakly alone
trapped in silent screaming stark
Dark.