Uncategorized

Less Challenging Dances

I find it easier
and, admittedly, more fun
to climb through tough terrain,
piles of leaves,
loose rocks,
debris,

If
and when
my goal is not to push sweaty through
by force of independently superior will,

But
to dance
with EarthTribe’s diverse
and miraculous co-creations,
sometimes feeling monstrous,

While marching
up our co-arising
complexly gorgeous,

Some might say “athletic”
hill.

And, when more still,
too quiet to dance,
advance,
transport myself
from points A
through fully alphabetized Z

I sit with members
of my inter-connecting choir
to sing my solo
inside dialogues
and depressingly competitive debates

Rituals of stuck
in ambiguous refrains
and angry rounds
of songs I’ve come to care for
yet fear to unload out loud

Taking turns
to catch up
and on
and on
without permitting any advice
ever
regardless of how unilaterally wise,
nor comment
before this circling non-dialogue
completes the time allotted
for this therapeutic day
of deeply listening monologue.

And then my dance
begins inside
as sung by curiosity.

Open ended,
round and full of comprehensive stretches
across all open intersectional space
and sufficient
efficient
inter-connected time
to rhyme our stories
sung in resonance
of universal therapy
for uniting traumas.

But curiosity
does not predict
responses right
and wrong
or either serenely left
or redly fight.

Curiosity draws
us out toward undiscovered
yet felt recovered
resonance
reconfirming choirs of angels
singing Earth’s therapeutic climates
of bravely danced
resilience.

Standard
Uncategorized

History Lessons

Victims of Straight
White
Patriarchal History
are usually not hopelessly unenlightened
and permanently disabled

Ostracized by Self
and/or Others
from healthy democratic
co-redemptionVictims of Straight
White

Baptized
and medicated
and meditated
into Truth seeking Beauty,
Sacred Voices seeking Secular Choices
reflecting cooperative EarthTribe’s
most win/win integral
indigenous Wisdom.

The unStraight
unWhite
unMale
are not unPeople
living outside touchable
tangibly co-invested
co-operatively healthy
wealthy society.

We have always been inside
Earth’s natural/spiritual mind
nondualistically embodied
economic
and political structure

Which co-created us
democratic
co-passionate communicators
from past regenerations
toward future generations
seeking wealth-optimizing cooperative health.

Our co-empowering solution
to emotional and cognitive apartheid
is not always forced to colonize vulnerable prey
for failure to rise
to some self-empowered
top OnePercent

Overpowering those Others
deaf,
blind,
and voiceless
in superstructures
of echoing monocultural oppression
suppression
negative repression
rather than positive impression;
anxiety defeating anticipation.

Healthier democratic resolutions
can transform win/lose competitions
into win/win cooperative social structures
as We The EnLightened People
of democratic compassion
become organically organized beings
within our health wealthing
EarthCentric Tribes.

Such environmentally transcendent transformation
does disempower StraightWhiteMonoCultural privileged
monochromatic views
of monotheistic
autocratic
secularizing Purpose

Divorced from sacred democratic Meaning,
attenuating resilience
and resonance
with marginalizing
disenabling
institutionalizing
consumptive
dysfunctional
predative colonizing intent
of Might Makes MonoCulturing Right
for anthrosupremacists.

A StraightWhitePatriarchal capitalist
consumer model of historical education
assuming monotheistic
“From Above”
autocratic powers for controlling communication
cannot peacefully
or therapeutically
or justly
or sacramentally
avoid a co-passionate threat
to healthy co-producers

Wealthing positive deviant ecofeminists
leading organic EarthTribe
with unrelentingly curious
co-gravitating
co-arising
dipolar nonpartisan solidarity
of EarthTribal organic compassion.

Standard
Uncategorized

MonoPolistic Issues

The MonoTheistic conclusions
self-righteously drawn
by too many Straight
White
Male corporate leaders

More comfortable with their asset management skills
than uncomfortable with their power overish tendencies
of systemic capitalism
historic kleptocracy
transcendent autocracy

Is dark-skinned slavery,
dark-minded disempowerment,
defensive proprietary oppressor
zealously predative mistakes
assuming lack of sacred
enlightenment
in profane Other.

By contrast,
the PolyEcological resolution
of EarthMother indigenous wisdom
is multicultural co-investment
in healthy democratic
win/win wealthy polyvagal neurosystems

Finding universal
uniting salvation
in resonantly resilient
health care energy

Massively co-mediated
co-empathic
co-operatively owned
and nutritiously nurtured
addiction to EarthPeace
multiculturing healthy democratic
healing justice.

When our religious beliefs
don’t mention
and challenge
systemic racism,
then we suffer
from anti-ligion,
dissociative division,
Other punishing injustice,
more than we restore worship
awe
connection
with all Earth’s multiculturally healthy
resilient diversity,
Truth and Beauty
of cherished sacred life.

Standard
Uncategorized

Resonant Muses

Tensions between professional teacher
and therapeutic integrity
are as old as cultural wars
between knowing scientific theories
and feeling artistic expressions.

How many times have I heard
I am a teacher
not a therapist?

How many times have we noticed
I can’t LeftBrain effectively learn
when I don’t feel
and hear,
can’t touch
and smell
and taste RightBrain healthy resonance
and long-term safe well-being resilience?

How long might it take
to wrestle with why “professional therapist”
sounds and feels
like a patriarchal capitalist
overly-commodified,
so suspiciously predative
oxymoron to my own compassion needs?

To feel
to personally
deeply and widely listen
learn
know thriving
co-empowered
humane
sacred solidarity futures,

Therapeutic wealth
of integral
educational health

Rooted in Left/Right bicameral balance
informed by polypathically enlightened
multigenerational
indigenous wisdom experience
of past
felt and touched
humane regenerators
courageous resonators
curious integrators
amusing muses
impassioned musicians.

If we are all disempowered empaths
with multicultural learning goals
I might better understand
universally therapeutic
polycutural
polypathic
polyphonic
communally polyvagal neurosystemic
and ego-preferred polynomial values

Are healthy
when ego-centers
transform from disabled
RightBrain interdependent prominence
to re-sourced
re-created
resonant
with indigenously sacred
transparent meaning
of integral well-being experience

Rediscovered in secular professional purpose
of compassionate vocational healing
co-intelligently restoring well-being relationship

Bicamerally re-storying
bilaterally communicated
binomial co-arising compassion

Of LeftBrain educated Truth
exhaled
after engaged by deep peace
inhaled
sacred Other listening
for integrity’s empowering
enlightened cooperative potential

Yet still,
today,
disabled EarthTribe Beauty,

Wrapped solidarity rapt
in synergy’s promised professional
therapeutic Trust,

Harmony’s impassioned Muses
echoing time’s evolving Thrust.

Standard
Uncategorized

Disabling Corporate Culture

Dynamically spiraling fractions
of potentially integral energy
win/win cooperative
and win/lose disruptive

Against peaceful eight octaves
of eight
is one hundred per day
full-octave spectral revolutions
during bilateral peace-sentry nights

DoubleBinary
for fractal 4 = NonZero ReGenerative
indigenous spacetime dynamic
century sensory wisdom

Integrity’s sacred RightBrain ReWeaving Potential
to Climax Reset
for yet another Business
As Naturally Usual
Fibonacci Octave-Neural Outcome
Holonic Spirited day

Ecstatically filled
with intersectional FractalGroup
primal family

Organic in/out-sided experiential
WinWin
Holonic LifeHealth Play

With regenerate pattern
synergy rhythmed
ribboned
spiraling bilaterals
of health structure maps
for fractal collaterals
like sacred integral
territorial DNA

Redeveloping another dynamic
experiential
pedagogical
eco/theological envelopment
of Music,
Myth,
and MetaPhonic
MetaPhysic
MetaPathic
MetaPhoric
bicameral
historical euphoria

LeftBrain seas
in 3/12
three dimensional
hourly and daily
temporal space
pace

While RightBrain hears
in 4/4 sacred surfing fractals
for annual
seasonal un/redevelopment
cooperatives

Deep RightBrain interweaving
binomially thoughtful maps
with flowtrend feeling
integrity territories

DoubleBinding
dipolar co-arising
regenerative four-seasoned
structured time

For healthier pedagogical maps
deep RightBrain
interdependently sacred connected
by transparent vulnerability
ability to recommunicate
resistance to monoculturally marginalizing
autistically ghettoizing
mental hospitalizing
unhoused
unhinged OTHER populations

Oppressed remains
for cooperative peer-educated persistent
monocultural domination
of middle class straight white
PatriCapitalist AnthroSupremacy

AND, in this polycultural win/win
therapeutic cooperative
co-passionate resistance,
we thereby restore public
and climate health education systems
engaging in wealthier deep learning

So, oppressed Earth’s great climatic health
returning
as polyculturally woke
fractured fractal wounded wealth

EcoTherapy for re-educating
history’s English privileged classroom
for unstraight
unwhite
un-monotheistic
un-vested
discommunioned
traumatically suppressed people,
for oppressed organic
living
integral planning and implementing
secular purpose
and sacred meaning systems
more favorably impressed
by Teacher Mother Eartha

Dynamically spiraling fractions
of potentially integral
octaves of harmonic energy
win/win resiliently cooperative
and win/lose
degeneratively disruptive.

Standard
Uncategorized

Silent UnPrivileged Stories

When I was a Big Brother
for Jason,
an African-American 10 year old male,
we went into his apartment
so he could look around
for a long overdue library book.

As I accompanied him
from room to sparsely furnished room,
looking in nearly vacant closets,
cupboards,
drawers,
the only book we found
was a phone book,
looking silently neglected
much more than actively abused.

My first white male privileged
feelings about his Mom
had to do with blaming her
for probably not even feeling ashamed
for her irresponsible choices
while economically and politically administering
their bookless house
in this pre-WWW information age.

But, then I began asking questions.
What could Jason tell me
about his Mom’s life
when she was his age?

What were stories
familiar to her,
read
or retold
or experienced
and re-experienced,
therapeutic or traumatic?

Through this widening narrative moment
of multigenerational conjecture,
hypothesis,
questioning,
contemplating,

I also learned to question
what traumatic straight white male stories
are experienced by gay
and bisexual
and transsexual 10-year-olds,
regardless of racial identification,

And by 10-year-old girls,
perhaps regardless of racial identification,
or even further amplified
by being doubly,
and silently, outside
straight white patriarchal privilege.

I found myself
suddenly
tearfully
incapable of briefly imagining
much less deeply,
unflinchingly contemplating
the trauma
of growing up poor
and lesbian
and black or brown
or too red
or too yellow
without any books
or stories,
read
or retold
or experienced
about how her 10-year-old life will matter,
could be healthy, someday,
would ever be felt safe,
unless held shamefully silent,

Not appropriate material
for books
or retelling
or experiencing straight
white
male dominant stories,
economic
and political narratives
about retributive trauma
and not multicultural
restorative
democratically inclusive therapy.

Standard
Uncategorized

Advent of Climate Depression

After required Thanksgiving Day
and depressing night
I awoke surprised
by release into ego-homelessness.

What could sad night despairs mean?
Reiterating loss of identity
mysteriously appearing on this habitat’s coldly absent roof
of sacred grace
space.

Why would capital depression,
RightBrain suppression
and historic patriarchal suppression
suddenly gang up more gracefully,
less threateningly,
on ZeroZone ego-homelessness
freely chosen
before rudely thrown out
for lack of paternal place.

RightBrain fullness of soul
remains ZeroZen timeless re-identification
one empty homeless side without exterior shelter.
But, for how long could eternity reweave
temporary housed DNA souls
becoming Earth’s healthy resilient lifeline?

Advent invites homeless nurturing adventures
into matriarchal kindness, silent advances
into wildly blind blizzards
binding sun’s enchanting rainbow promise
of watery return to Earth’s temporary spring sanctuary
refueling DNA’s homeless
yet robust
absence of living boundaries

Toward, rather than against, Earth’s healthy wealth
future identity transgenerating
transubstantiating temporary sanctuary
in humane health-identity space,
Earth’s co-arising sacred time
of ego’s secular summer
for ecology’s climate climax.

Mutually homeless failing falling theology pilgrims,
EgoYang and EcoYin polypathic souls
overshadowed
by Earth’s great green sanctuary assigned
to re-study timeless regenetic root systems
playing WinWin ZeroSoul revolutionary games
for homeless trusted identity, sheltering
from wildly wounded wandering
within chronic asylum anxiety,

Lost in lonely inside forests
quaking,
outside breaking,
patriarchal fake-sanctuary voices
inside cooperative matriarchal wombing choices.

A lot of cold windy Dad talk
trumped
in each infant WinWin womb
by Mom’s resolute inside nutritional walk.

Homeless ego child
re-connecting this eco-womb,
preparing to journey home again
each sacred light of wintry advent’s dawn

After thanksgiving days
and depressing night
re-awakening surprise
of ego’s wandering
health-rooted
adventurous soul
revolution dawning in darkest brights.

Standard
Uncategorized

Can’t Make You Stalk Me

Turn up the lights
Fold up the bed
Turn up those voices
outside my head
Lay out for me
Feed me with lies
Just hold me up, your patron saint
Do matronize me

‘Cause I can’t make you stalk me
if you won’t
You can’t make your mind think something
it don’t
Here in my light,
in these early hours
I will pick up my heart
and not feel your power
But I can’t, no I won’t
‘Cause I can’t make you stalk me,
when you don’t.

I’ll freeze my eyes,
then you won’t see
The heart you don’t feel
when you’re not holding me
Evening will come
and you’ll do what’s wrong
Just give me till then
to give up this song
And you could give up our wrong

‘Cause I can’t make you love us
if you won’t
You can’t make your mind feel something
it don’t
Here in our light,
in these late hours
I will pick up my heart
and I’ll feel our power
But I can’t, no I can’t
‘Cause I can’t make you stalk peace,
when you don’t.

 

With apologies to Allen Shamblin and Michael Reid who cooperatively wrote one of my favorite songs.

Standard
Uncategorized

Love Seasoned Health

Negative Yin flows
pride’s depression
as Negative Yang down-blows
humility’s oppression,

As Positive Yin knows
bilateral awed impression
as Positive Yang grows
healthy-wealth wondrous compassion,

Winter in as Summer out
WhiteHouse down as GreenHouse up
Yin back as Yang forth,
BrightHole Alpha
as Matriarchal (0)Mega Womb

Depressed Alfalfa
as oppressive OliveOil,
in another LoseLose childhood dream.

These four faces of change
are like four-horse seasons
of worship,
liturgical summer life
through winterish death
of ego’s LeftBrain Robber Baron dominance.

Negative Yang with Negative Yin,
both self-oppression and other-depressing,
represent winter
as advent of creolizing chaotic rebirth
through grief and messianic weakness.

Positive Yang with Negative Yin,
self-compassion with residual depressing memories
of winter’s coldly violent revolutions,
nightmares of loss,
hibernation of interdependence,
usher spring’s replanting schedules,
organic developments
for environmental and interior rebirth.

NewBorns cooperatively search
and knock
and find
summer’s PositiveYang-PositiveYin
co-passion with awed self-esteem
climax,
Yet late summer Musing maturity
already predicts Autumn,
early harvest stages
of WiseElder beloved community discernment.

PositiveYin with NegativeYang
speak up
for a healthier Left with Right ego-eco balance,
a return to secular/sacred worshiping
health quantities and love qualities
of ElderRight procreator
with YoungerLeft co-awed
intra-interior personal
inter-exterior political compassion,
impression,
harvesting our best WinWin seeds,

Rejecting LoseLose historical experience,
Negative Yang with Negative Yin
eternal winter
predicting
both Ego and Eco-demise
rather than
PositiveYang health
with PositiveYin wealth,
wondrous FullSun compassion for myself
impressed by awe with sacred EarthTribe Other.

Regarding what we will
now more polyculturally
polypathically plant
this polyphonic WinWin
ZeroZone Spring.

Standard
Uncategorized

Dillen’s Continuing DMV Adventures

I wrote a sad but true urban legend called “Dillen and the DMV” last week.
Here follows an update.

Background Review:

One of my health care employees, Dillen, has wicked ADD, borderline intelligence, not qualifying for disability supports, which are few
and those few minimal at best anyway,
but also challenged by things like getting to work on the right day at the right time,
challenged by processing verbal communications,
whether written or spoken more slowly than Business As Usual pace and pattern would permit,
challenged with struggles to establish and maintain healthy positive social relationships,
much more challenged by intimacy,
so often settling for companionship that does not foster mutually therapeutic co-mentoring,
challenged by his felt urgency for speed while driving,
challenged by States Attorneys who persuade him it’s OK to accept guilty as charged
for driving 45 in a 35 mph zone on his way to work,
never mind that so were all the cars in front of and behind him,
not to worry that this will inevitably result in a 3-month suspension of his license
because he can get a Work Permit,
except, oops,
never mind,
the DMV will not give Work Permits to suspended drivers
with more than three moving violations,
encouraged by State Prosecutors to go right ahead,
send in that Work Permit application
with his $100 nonrefundable fee
because the DMV is really all about punishing DUIs,
of which Dillen has none
because he doesn’t drink
because, in part, he knows it is bad for his mental health,
especially his chronic issues with depression.

In “Dillen and the DMV” I write to the DMV Commissioner,
the Chief States Attorney, and the Attorney General
about this series of unfortunate events.

Update:

I hear back from the DMV.
This letter patiently reviews Dillen’s multiple infractions.
Two involve having others in his car with marijuana or concomitant paraphernalia,
(why not just “supplies” or “equipment”?)

“Marge, did you order the paraphernalia for the copier machine yet?”
Word choices in the public sector often distract me.

but Dillen was not charged with driving stoned,
because he wasn’t.
He was the designated driver for his “friends”
who did not have their Medical Marijuana cards on them.

Then there was the time he might have been going 35 or 40 and hit black ice,
totaled his car
which ended upside down,
for which the local police felt they must issue some form of moving violation,
after all, we do have those towing charges
and the need for all those emergency folks to stand out in the freezing ice storm,
and there are these two drug-related violations on his driving record
so he was probably stoned anyway, right?

And then there was this time,
when Dillen was pulled over
ostensibly for speeding,
but really this was about driving on a suspended license
without a Work Permit
which he didn’t have because
(1) DMV didn’t have a current address to send him his notice,
so he didn’t know he was driving on a suspended license, and
(2) no one had told him,
including the Police Officer who pulled him over,
there is this Work Permit thing
which would have covered his butt
on this particular adventure in high speed suburban crime.

However, this letter from the DMV Director of Programs leaves out some details,
as does my summary.
Then the Program Director reassures Dillen and I of her concern for Dillen’s mess,
which someone else might have called unemployment
and yet another round of couch-surfing homelessness,
but CT’s pesky State Statutes wouldn’t allow her to refund his application fee,
and, besides,
the application form says right on there that it won’t be refunded
even if the application is rejected

Apparently for reasons that remain in the shadow of the public eye.
My two page letter was too subtle for government comprehension
of our own collective abuse and neglect.
She confirms the DMV does have explicit standards for rejecting applications,
including more than three moving violations,
but fails to apologize for designing her Program’s communication plan
to be sure that disproportionately young urban minority low-income males
with mental health and self-medication issues
would be fleeced of their last $100
ripped out of their hungry pockets
to apply for a Work or Education Permit
that State Statutes prohibit her,
so sadly,
from handing out like mother’s milk to a starving baby.

She also does not speculate about why State Prosecutors Dillen has met
are all apparently unaware of stipulated public, but effectively private, criteria for rejecting
pricey applications.

She also fails to mention what she might do to correct this situation
of not providing transparent public information
in a way that allows respected residents of the State of CT
to make a fully informed decision about wasting their money
by further investing in the future miserable outcomes
of shoddy DMV Programs.

She also does not explain where we,
the tax-payers of CT,
were when concerns about the need for job security,
especially for those in hard-to-employ populations,
where we were when needs for food and housing,
healthy wants for continuing education and training,
including the need for continuing education and training,
including the need for reasonable transportation,
even in the winter,
where we all were when these were not being weighted sufficiently against risks,
allowing licensed drivers with complex histories
to continue on their journey
the best they can.

Personally, I know Dillen responds much better to a warm hug,
a patient smile,
and expressed appreciation for continuing to improve,
and encouragement to continue with work
and sticking with a healthy daily routine,
which does not include speeding,
even if everyone around him is racing to nowhere good.

Yesterday I was mesmerized for several hours by a TV series
“Underground”
about the Railroad prior to the U.S. Civil War.
A champion anti-slavery attorney
confesses to his Northern wife,
as a younger attorney he used to settle estates,
including estates of slave-holders,
which sometimes led to the awkwardness of arranging for resale of people,
families,
often resulting in the tearing of children from their mothers’ arms,
and other similar heinous crimes against nature
and mental health.

For some reason
I kept thinking about that clerk at DMV,
reading Work Permit applications,
after depositing the enclosed nonrefundable $100,
looking at the high security publicly invisible list of reasons not to help
depressed people living mostly in their cars
have a modestly better chance at life,
as if what is a right for him or her
on his or her way to work and home again,
is a too luxurious privilege for a fragile at-risk criminal population,
enslaved by their need to self-propel their freedom futures.

Standard